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Happy aromantic spectrum awareness week!

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Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Happy ear Mandic spectrum awareness. Week everyone so as you can done by my all of you that this is what I'm going to talk about being mandic and what that has meant for me and before I even start obviously wanted to give a definition of being a romantic so as an eater minded person. I feel no romantic attraction to anyone but in gendron anyone who has era matic could feel little or no romantic attraction to be our only feeder minded construction to be invasion. Eric Asians are under a very address. A consensus so hi. This is another part of my identity. I am either manic. Something that I've talked about before is being sexual route so these are two different things but for me the sort of good together just because align very well in terms of being on the same side of the spectrum which is like a we from what the world expects you to be which I guess is is a thing for many people who identify differently than what the Gentry society expects. You do identify as anyway so this episode. I wanted to talk about what it means for me to be eater MANDIC and how I had the inner dialogue with myself. Do you figure out that I'm either magic and not some other kind of romantic and just telling this my story? I guess so Even before I start I just wanted to see that figuring out my romantic orientation all my I guess being eater. Mandich was much harder than figuring out that sexual and I think if you find it hot during the sun was the difference between dramatic or indeed and sexual orientation the best way that my friend was romantic. Attraction is who you want delivered whereas sexual attraction is who you want to go to bed and from what I understand going to bed with. Someone is like a very strong feeling that people feel towards a specific worsen and they want to like do actions related to that so the fact that I didn't want to do any of that or didn't feel in physical attraction to what somewhat was very easy to gauge. In that game me I because all yeah this makes sense. I'm a sexual but when I think of what. So what do I want remanded we? It was harder because I think the biggest thing is that it's hard to define what falls under the romantic side of things right like I always while growing up wanted to marry you want to do have a family and Twenty to have that typical family that the DVD's shows showed me and my life showed me but off delake alarm dissecting and ask him questions. I realized that I wanted to have kids. And be a CO parent with my best friend. Do those kids. That is what I thought was a normal marriage but now I've learned obviously there's more to it but I kind of knew growing up that I'm not very romantic person but that was kind of considered okay like all of us know people in relationships where one is more romantic than the other. But these things will work out so when I was offered out that Sexual I side questioning like weed. So what's my romantic orientation and that was much harder because I had to. I define what I'm mean to be dramatic and in my head before I even questioned what what is romance. I used to think it's just like it's just the same as being with your best friend. I know understood what the difference between being relationship and being with your best friend was and now I understand does like more sexual stuff to it but also also that romance side effects which has gone d to make each other feel special. You make each other realize that you're more important than just a normal friend and for me. There are people who are very important to me but I consider them my friends. Because I don't think I would necessarily like to hold a hand or colluded with them on. I don't know I don't think I would be comfortable with them being in my Boston. Space all the time but I would stern want to be there for them if they need head and I know they'd be. Defa me if I need help so we have. We have that special bond. But we don't necessarily help the romance but in the bond so I had really said Don Indus- at Wedge Romance Means for me. Do I ever wanted to ever feed attracted to be ballooning romantic. Solder we and that was hard like I think figuring out sexual misconduct like half the dame that figuring out. I was ear MANDIC DICK. Because I had do sedan and imagine all these scenarios that I thought I wanted for the longest time in my life and actually asking myself if I would be comfortable in the scenario so I did think that I would like to did someone at some point but then when Assad known anonymous like would I be comfortable going out for dinner with someone under the under the. I guess like todd that this romantic evening. Not just assigning front as friends and allies. That I wasn't I wasn't comfortable with someone thinking that be a more than France. I don't know why but like when I think of that. It just doesn't feel normal natural to me. But here's the thing I like. Seeing romance in movies are like my friends when the In Romantic reminded situations alike are happy. Feel I feel happy for them but every time I imagine someone sending me flowers or rolling my hand dig. Miana Dido meeting them out on a date. I feel awkward about a dozen fee lake. The puzzle pieces fit and I think it. Was this awkwardness. That made me realize that. Yeah I'm reminded because I've never seen someone on that someone who are one dude. Do these things with do will hands. And maybe cuddling just st exclusively word for the longest time. Because I've realized that people who I'm really attached to people who are thinking closest friends once they start dating. I am happy for them. If they're happy I can see that they're happy and then that makes me happy but does no sense of jealousy or does not that I feel is like oh you should only hang out exclusively with me. I like you should only have special bonding dimes with me. And not this other person but yeah just like. I'm not saying that when people put their boyfriends girlfriends like that significant other partners above the best friend that it's okay it has not okay and tactfully. My friends have done that yet but I do know that the might be times when my friends choose their board knows over me but I think for now like that hasn't happened to me so I haven't felt jealous about them spending time with the significant others but if that does happen ambrish all my friends will understand that. I do want them to be deaf me because I will be there for them in important situations but honestly. I do expect my friends do that. I don't expect my friends to see. Yeah I know you're in need of my health but I'm a significant other and they are more important. The News oops. I'm not coming to help you. I don't think any of my friends would ever see that but That was the main thing the main thing. If meteorologist era and Dick was media leising that people who? I'm really close to who I consider my close friends. If this dating someone else I would not be jealous. And that's how I figured out. I was romantic because I just never fed piece of of being more auden friends with someone. I've just know that even thinking of that with someone kind of puts me away from that whole relationship. Because I'm like no. This was supposed to be a special thing for us. But now you've made it remind. Dick which is not something that fits my. I Dunno my brain structure on my understanding of life so being in Amman Dick for me means that I have never felt traumatic attraction to someone and every time I explained someone that I'm Era Mandic. Explain it to someone that. I'm your mandate is sexual. People always see like all. But you shouldn't give up and you shouldn't close the doors but here's the thing. I am not closing the doors like I'm not denying feelings. I'm just seeing that. I've never felt it and yeah if I feel it. I will definitely acknowledged side. Because that's what I've learned by questioning everything that my feelings are my own define and our own do understand and if I feel something I will acknowledges because if I don't do it now and come up later it will definitely come up later.