Luis Garcia, Strath and Sickness discussed on This is War

This is War
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I think they went out to the scene initially like pretty much right away in determine that. Nobody provides the crash and then they had to send a team out there to retrieve all the bodies. And then the next day after that, they wanted to retrieve the helicopter so that we, we had to go out there and. It was. It was tough at the time I wasn't thinking about. I was thinking about how are they going to Strath helicopter on a seven time. It didn't make sense. I thought it was goofy. It was dangerous. I thought it was. I just remember thinking it wasn't the best idea for me to go out there and retrieve anything. But when I got out there and they picked up the bodies picked all that up, but they didn't pick up people's personal stuff there still packs laying around. They're still gear and flak jackets and boots, and I didn't know anybody on that airplane or that helicopter. I didn't know one person, but it's so tragic to to just sitting there rife like trying to pick the stuff up and put it in a place where somebody might be able to get some of the stuff back to their family. Like there was little kids gave their dad's like little stuffed animals. To help them make sure they were safe. And they didn't make it back. And it just it hits me to this day because. Somebody, somebody lost somebody important to them. And even though I didn't know them, those were some Americans that lost their lives in that desert. And I felt a little shame to myself. I was mad that I was out there because I had to pick up a fucking helicopter. Like the severity of the situation didn't hit me into got out there and I felt for those families and there, there's people that didn't know that their loved ones were gone forever, but I did didn't know. Didn't know. So I just made sure that I can at least gather up their stuff respectfully and give it to someone who would care about. Luis Garcia returned home with about two years left on his contract and no real plan for what he would do wants to service was over when he got out in two thousand eight. The economy was in shambles and only get worse. He and his wife moved in with his parents while he looked for work, his hope was to get into a union. But by the time he was working and they could move out on their own. His marriage was beyond repair. He was divorced and intermittently unemployed, which he said was the perfect opportunity to throw himself a five year long pity party. I got out one hundred percent marine with the same friggin attitude and everything that you're gonna show me respect. This is how I do shit. I don't take a lot of talk back that shit. Don't fly out here. People don't respond to that. You know, I had to completely change my way of thinking when I got out and it was the toughest thing to do. People don't know me from fuck. In anybody in they don't care. I'm just another average dude driving down the street. Although he was eventually able to join the electricity union and joined a few veterans groups where he could speak with like minded people. Lewis had this uncontrollable rising bitterness over the way. Things had gone since his separation from the marines. Somehow he had thought things would be better or at least not harder, and he couldn't reconcile the fact that they weren't and he couldn't stand the fact that he couldn't impose order on his life. I hadn't done drugs. I'd appaled a little bit here and there, but I haven't really done anything serious since I was in high school. And I remember somebody giving me some of these little yellow pills, and I pop one of and I felt so good. I remember getting a little bursts of energy. I got a little euphoria. I felt like it didn't matter that no-one, no-one cared that I sacrificed how much for this country Christmases and time with my. Family and pretty much my marriage in thou. I'm not working all that bitterness and all that pity party shit that I was putting myself through just like vanished. When I took these drugs, I remember that and it was as simple as that Luis Garcia went from an angry vet who felt as if he'd been forgotten to mostly upbeat addict with a good job in a matter of weeks, the thing was, he honestly didn't make the connection until he ran out of pills, and I got to work that day in it felt like I had the flu. I remember I felt so sick. I was bent over. I was I had diarrhea could at work and I was like, what is going on? I just didn't know what was going on. And I started looking up shit on my phone and found out that I'm in withdrawal, and that you're probably addicted to these pills and stuff. I was like, there's no fucking way. I'm just sick, but I was like, you know what? Let's let's see test this out. So I called somebody up bought like ten or fifteen more those pills. I eight to them and all that. Sickness dissolved, and I said, oh, fuck I. So this is definitely a problem. And from that point on for the next four years, I would do anything for pain pills, just pain pills decimal my life, you know, my life pain pills pain pills upon pain pills. And I just I couldn't get. I couldn't stop. It took years. And then I finally got hit with a drug test at work and failed it. And the union basically told me that I could either keep my job and go to rehab, or I keep doing drugs and not be a union electric. With

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