Eighteen, Madeleine, Daphne discussed on Get Your Glow Back

Get Your Glow Back


While the we say to ourselves. Yeah i think we all do that to one degree or another. And i was thinking about that the other day actually and i think it comes from in my case this question. Mia good guy right there so much about this question. It also implies that your worth is determined by being good so this can be good or enough. It can be anywhere. It doesn't really matter. It means that you're worth is determined by something that you need to do. In data to be worthy alley age. that's what we are advocating. A new get defined by your actions toward that just by being you. Maximum be the change is one of the sentences i think about every day and a more deeper becomes because i think about the case of be being and this is why grass and take a moment and is the most awful thing you can do because you then realize that you are are in just by being you have an impact rattling. This is what i keep on saying doesn't matter how south away you are. Not whether you're trying to be good or not. It doesn't really matter one way or another. You are impacting the world around you. You saw you know whether you have a face or smiley face. Sorry that means that just being who you are you having an impact that means that you met on that means that you are already enough right so if we can take that as the starting point van can ask ourselves okay. If i truly believe that i met how might i use my power To create an intentional impact and that's where setting intentions and and your values can make an enormous difference to how you pursue met full stock that we cannot deny. But that's so then we stop asking questions okay fine. I met her while huge. Then you ask. How do i want to. What do i want and then you are freeing yourself from this fear that you're not enough because you already are. The question is what will you do with your enough nece absolutely that. I've never heard anyone speak about it before so something that i was getting promoted saying but by parents is that we got stock. Say good boy girl. Is that an important thing in new wave of parenting that we need to see. Should we can break the cycle and just constant need celebrating them as being with them being good doing something right and honesty madeleine. I don't have regrets fears. I just believe we have the life we have because we meant to learn what we are meant to. I do wish. I had some of those insights and when i was younger. Just say that. I could have parented differently on my daughters are eighteen and twenty now and i mean there are amazing. I loved them. And i've learned so much from them and i wouldn't wanna change a single thing and yet absolutely. Do i now believe that the most important gift that we can give is to bring this curiosity and wonder to your child and ask them about their salts. And why they're doing things and like you said not pressurized on not your own way and your own baggage and your own conditioning onto them and that means that darned sight all you're such a good guy because then your daughter will ask okay. So what do i need to do to be a good girl when it's not something we want anymore isn't that we don't we could see ourselves struggled and are still struggling to take the reins to define our own mattering as it were and not for others to determine that and si- perhaps bringing more of curiosity to your time say. Oh that's interesting what you did that. Can you tell me what you did there. In rather than evaluating dunedin. That's really great for japan right. Yeah i think one of the things that i've been reflecting a lot on not to bring your own value actions and your baggage to your parenting. Which is why being self aware and conscious is the greatest greatest gift you can bring your child because then in time your child will learn to be curious about how they feel what is going on within them and how they are defining is than done. Because i think it naturally the it's probably the most common phases jesus parenting one-step done something Whatever that kind of just pops out doesn't it. And i mean i definitely say often i know but i am daphne much more aware and it's interesting but we can't get it perfect we as terms. I think this is tightly to an i boast. Fee cavalry is my language. And i feel like. I've use some detrimental language which obsolete Because i actually is out of the question. And it's out of reach and just alluded to the fact that i've learned many of the things that i now sharing you know late and my daughters were absolutely grew up with me saying oh my god. You're amazing that's amazing good. How clever fantastic you know. And now we're having conversations about it and that's okay too you know and they have helped me to realize that how i have used a lot of my fear a lot of my fear and i've transferred onto them not because i'm going even pass the but because i lost numb and i had that fear and i let that fear drives me and humans. I think that's the most important point for me always with myself and with others as be kind to yourself. We are all trying our best. I'm simply and so we need to be kind and curious. I'd just be interested in what more we can learn and explore and then share that always on the condition that we're not gonna give us a hard time..

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