Heather Mcmahon, Michael Jackson, Tomorrow discussed on Absolutely Not

Absolutely Not


The phone rang. Podcast is a deer media. Production welcomed the absolutely not podcast. Where we do the most in the lease at the same damn time. I'm your host heather mcmahon. Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to another episode of the absolutely not podcast. I'm your host heather mcnair. I some real chipper right now. But i gotta be honest with you. I am under mild. Dj i went under today to get a couple exile. I'll tell you all about that and just set. And i'm still groggy. And here's the deal. I woke up from my four hour nap to a text message. That said. where's your podcast. When i said fuck. I totally forgot because i had surgery this morning. So i'm cranking out this bad boy. And that's i want you to know there's no days off no days off no days wasted and no days off eight a needle the size of a yard stick up in my uterus. Today is able to sleep for two hours and then get back to work blessed to be here love. You mean it I am under a little bit of anesthesia. Told me to sleep it off today. They said you're gonna be groggy on my medical paperwork. It said do not make any big decisions today. I don't know how great this podcast is going to be. I don't know if i will say something. That won't get me locked up. I don't know if the irs will be here tomorrow. Because i'm kind of high right now. None on recreational drugs on. I was in a medically induced at about seven. Am this morning so anyways update so we did the doctor all this week and they were like your body's responding to the medicine but not how we had hoped i. It was seven exit. Three eggs are responding to the medicine. And you need the eggs to get to a certain size in your estrogen. Level has to be to a certain number in order for them to extract the egg and hopes that it will be a mature egg in order for you to then fertilize it to make an embryo and or put it on ice as just an egg. If you don't have a partner or semen again. I'm basically the scientists. Now i've learned so much so on my doctor's appointment on saturday there were like we don't know what happened but we only see one egg so i don't know if you should go through with this and i basically was like okay and the my doctors. I think you should still do it. It's a four percent chance at any of this will work. We don't know what's going to happen but you've already come this far. You're already on the hormones. Let's just see what we can get taken out. And i was really bummed about it. I was like this. I feel like i've been bamboozled. Like what the fuck again. I did this to be proactive. I wasn't trying to have a baby right this moment. And now you're telling me i'm not reacting to any of this like it was just kind of like a fuck you but then i went into today and they went in there to extract the one ag the lone ranger jeff. Were seriously considering not even doing this by said at this point. Just get the shit out of me. You know i'm supposed be in the turksancacoes for a photo shoot. Show me your move. But unfortunately this took president. So i might be able to fly down there later so all my girlfriends are down at wimereux fucking taking their tops off drinking my ties and i had to go under mild anesthesia have a yardstick shoved up. Hoo-ha little bitter about it. Swollen like a roast lamb on a greek easter so i came out anesthesia. That was wild wild and they said they found three eggs sets good. Hey the answer point four and now they're like maybe point seven now. This is not mean anything. It doesn't mean anything is anything tomorrow. I'll get a phone call from the lab and they'll say either the eggs made it like they were mature enough so i think what they do is jeff had to go jisr and a cup and i think they immediately take his jisr connect my egg and then they try and see if it'll mature so they make an embryo and they see amateurs i think or are they. Just wait for the big guys. I don't fucking know. I really didn't pay attention all i know is. I'm not supposed to make any major decisions today. But tomorrow we'll find out whether or not any of the eggs made it or the embryos wherever the fuck were making. We'll find out. So i wanna say something for the bottom of my heart. Thank you so much for all the kind words and the and the and the encouragement. And i just think it's a really cool community that we've now built with you know ladies are going through it. I've even had some dude message me like i went through the with my wife a million times. We did this. Or i thought. I could egg freeze or you know again. I like i went into this completely. Just thinking oh. I'm gonna freeze eggs. Are you know freeze my embryos deal. I am a she female empire. I am doing the most going on to are doing bischoff. And then they were like you may have a really hard time having a later on and it's been a real mind fuck. I'm so heavy right now. I'm so swollen on these drugs but it's okay. 'cause they're out we did it. Were moving on whatever it may be. I'm getting back to work. I'm going to be on a treadmill for the next six months. But it's been a mind fuck. It was cool though. I was sitting in the doctor's office on saturday morning at eight. Am to get the final word of whether or not we were going to do this yet. And i two girls sitting next to me and one of the girls like i. Love your podcast. I've just had my embryo transfer. Look i'm worried about it. We don't have the baby you know. We don't know this is a viable pregnancy. And the other lady next to me is like i'm on day six shots like podcast too and it's just been really cool that i didn't realize i felt almost embarrassed that i've been sharing this and i feel genuinely from the bottom of my heart. That's the wrong way to feel. Because then i realized how many other women were going through it again. You don't know what you don't know until you put it out there and then you're like. Oh this fucking sucks for everybody. So i just wanted say thank you to everybody. Who has you know been just been kind to be. And if you connected to. What's going on or you know whether it's do talk. We're talking about fertility or you know just life in general I really am very much appreciative. That this is a cool community of people who can check in talk about life in what sucks because sometimes sometimes it's great great. I'll tell you what though anesthesia is fucking fun. I get why. I get profile thing. I get the michael jackson thing now. They gave you a little yummy something before they will yield me and he was like okay. And we're insert the medication and you're gonna fall asleep. Three to like sawn logs. Then medicine didn't stand a chance. And the anesthesiologist was ripped. Who's probably older guy in his mid fifties ripped salt and pepper too short for my liking. But just a rip dude news chugging a protein coffee and just are all. Y'all he's like you're going to feel good. We'll sup click on out. I woke up a warm and fuzzy and essentially been high sense. I was going to take the day off relax and then i realized i still had shit do so. I'm here so if i say something fucking nuts. Buckle up because dr klein who was my anesthesiologist said you don't feel gucci today. Sogeti coaches and a cup and it was like baby during your Your headphones he's like. Oh faulk it and i told him i was like well. You need you. You gotta watch porn in this room. Now mind you. it's a sterile environment and the offices that i go to our. It's very beautiful medical office. They've done a nice job with it. But i mean he literally at six. Am having ages and a cup in a sterile medical office. I said i'm a pretty horn person but you know what i'm not horny about six. Am six to eight. Am now eight thirty on till the following eight thirty the next eight very six to eight nine horny at all at six forty five this morning jefferson to take his phone into a room. Sit on a leather chair. That a million other men have sat on and jerk it and it's so funny to me. I don't know why it is so funny to me. Dudes jacket off is defined as thing to me still. I'm thirty four years old. i'm married. I have sex on a regular basis. And it makes me giggle. And i was like jeff you bring your headphones are all shit. I'm off to liz. Liz on silence. So i right now. And then when he picked me up he's like how are you feeling like i'm good is a guy i was like. How are you feeling will let me do. His voice voice suck all more bab bad. I turned up the volume. I realized i had a jbl speaker in the car. I was blessed in that shit through the office. I i let them know what i was up to. And i'm make you did. Not but he thought that was so funny..

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