Depression, Dr Ayman, United States discussed on The Jasmine Star Show
Me. I'm Puerto Rican will throw you under a big yellow bus in two point five seconds black. Bless you might actually be California. Get over it out. I'm GONNA do right now. Don't judge me only only picturing like US standing at my house in a bikini and that's actually not I haven't been making us and tell us okay so we knew that right. Oh girl I hailed from the school of pieces. Don't don't get don't get it twisted but sir she comes in jeans with a bathing suit and a little cover up but she's going to pull party. Of course she is. She's fancy like that fancies relate really. It's actually a beach party for a twelve year old at Bolsa Chica. Fancy is not that I will girl get right. Come at me and I will come at you with a twelve year. Old Often. The J. cracking up but this is this is happy hour which is so appropriate when we're talking about depression yes I do love this but I love all these tools. I they wanted this to be a conversation about like what did we do we. I love to follow people. That are just a little bit or a lot ahead of me. Like they've kind of figured something Athena and there's a lot of stuff we have not figured out but with this. I feel like we've worked really hard on making ourselves better and healing healing ourselves around the depression so I thought we have to talk about what we've done ads. So you talked about the therapy but there's other stuff like when we were chatting in my office you talked about the mastermind wherein that's done absolutely in. I think that people listening could say well. I don't have support a family or I don't have a supported spouse right. Don't have sport of children and that could be true and let's back up one tiny second Dr Ayman since we're serving religious. Dr Ayman has a series of questions if I have applied them and I think it has had the most profound change in my perspective this in addition to other things but if anybody's listening and be like I'm tired of hearing these girls talk. I I want to make practical. Let's get into the practicality before we actually talked about the decisions we made as a result the practicality right so when you are having a negative or overwhelming thought the first things I write it down. There is something about writing the additive stopping and writing down. It's as if it's like an exorcism it comes out of you and then you see it forces you to look at it and Dr Very specific about that so you write it down okay so you write it down and then you ask yourself. So let's use you as an example Campobasso. If you would write something on your get what would be one thing that you're struggling with okay. So they're being one hundred hundred one hundred so I would say that that. There's a lot during to think of wine if I wanted to personal or business if I did business I'd say I can't get it all done fast enough off and if I don't I'm GonNa be Irrelevant K.. That's what you read in your paper. Okay in the second question is is this true. Aw Aw love. Acquisition and instantly. I know it is not true now. There could be people listening while it could be. Because there's sometimes I have deep thought dark mark thoughts that they'll very true such as my body will not release this weight so we got personal. We talked about my weight loss. There's as I get on the scale and it has. It moved for days and days Zor a week and I think my body wants to be fat like it will it will. I cannot lose weight and that fills true some days for me. Okay if we're looking at both the situation guy. I don't move fast enough. I'm going to be irrelevant. Yeah I am destined to remain this way. Yes and if we were to ask ourselves. Is this true and in even if you responded committee in the third question to ask yourself is am I a hundred percent certain of my response. Oh my gosh so right away it away right right away. Yeah it's no because we are not fortunetellers. We don't know with certainty if we are destined to be relevant over destined to be overweight. We don't know that right and then once we answer that then we know. How does it make me feel? How does let's just focus on business right okay? How does being irrelevant feel to you? It makes me feel small. It makes me feel scared. It makes me feel like I'm not enough. I'm less than or I'm good enough. And and once you and this is all written and once you see that. Do you think that those feelings will keep you from the purpose you have been sent here on the world. Yes and Yes yes last question. What would feeling the opposite of this? Like what if you were to look at that day. I'm going to be irrelevant. I'm not moving fast enough. We feel the negative emotions. What if you were to say I am moving at the right pace? I will always be relevant for a group of people. It would make me feel grounded in secure her and confident and excited or on the projects. I'm working on a these questions are good. We will certainly be listened them in the show notes. Stand okay so now. This is something I learned from. Our mastermind organizer Mentor Unicorn. James we are not our thoughts. He reminds me of that all the time. That the things things that we think are not us. They're just our thoughts so if we were to look at a piece of paper based on this like walking through from Dr Ayman we can choose to feel a relevant and lost and like things are passing. Are we choose to feel grounded and hopeful insecure. The choice is hours it takes just as much energy to feel fearful as it does decide I choose faith in setting Zion. This okay this is exactly you what I work on every single week with my weight loss coach and I think this is what has moved me so I love that. We're both are on the same. I didn't even know that you were diving into questions like that but I just realized this is exactly why I've been feeling so good lately is because I examined that like every day every day and what happens is people that I don't have time like I'm I'm in the car pool line. I'm at the grocery store. I have two jobs. I have a side hustle. When might you just walk diarrhea and like writing my issues down like a luxury? Listen booboo you do not take care curve yourself. There are a line of people who need you. So if you're in that car pool line you need to pull on over and you say baby. You'RE GONNA wait thirty seconds just got do this real quick. If you're at the grocery along you bring your phone you write it all down and then you ask yourself in this moment. I choose to feel what that has been the most profound difference in how I look at everything now. Do I think that I have the capacity to move through depression as a result of this process. No do I believe with all all of my heart that I have the capacity to change an expedite the process as a result of this hell. Yes Hell yes is right. I want to point now. You just reminded me of this when we were talking about it earlier. You brought up. Brunei Brown's Gold Plated Grit Grit JAP now with first of all with goldplated grit. If I came up for me when I called you to tell you I wanted to do an episode about my weight but I was scared to do cells and I thought that was a little bit mean to you. You were like you're doing it and you're telling the story about how you a lot of cupcake's that we're your size for his birthday. That was probably the hardest part of that push. Kevin Love. You do push me in love so with that though. I told Jasmine I said I don't WanNa do this episode about my weight and for those of you who haven't heard it. It was a while ago. I can and linked to it in the show notes. But I didn't WanNa do it because at the time I hadn't started losing weight I wasn't on a weight. Loss journey didn't have any tools to help me at the time so I had nothing to give in that moment except the truth that I don't like doing video because I am overweight. And that is embarrassing to me. That's all I had had to give in that episode. And you said that's enough and you brought up this gold plated grit so first of all we you tell people what that means. Because I don't do a good job explaining it but second. It came up when I asked you to talk about some of this. So Bernie Brown. She is like basically our best friend she never know a and you love her. Here's the thing I wonder. Why are your house not mine? Your House is way more show ready. Let's be like I was like Brennan. Welcome to my my house. Come into my closet. Her love her voice. She's an amazing and she's from Texas. Yes without. She's like y'all and she could say just so like Zola's a lot about words and I love that but coming from her. They're they're almost like sacrosanct regularly. Oh look how sweet bless her heart. Okay so she talks about gold plated grit and gold plated. Great is our ability to talk about things after. We've already accomplished them so how easy it is for us just to diminish how hard is situated was when we can just say l.. Guys I went on this journey I lost one hundred pounds and and this is how I did it. What we do by keeping our story to ourselves is inadvertently protecting ourselves protecting our ego? We do not want to be vulnerable because the minute you say. I'm on a weight loss journey all of a sudden. You give people immigration to watch you when you're out dinner right when you decide to have Glass of wine in so gold plated. Grit is talking about something. In retrospect in the thing that encouraged amy to do which would come back to haunt want me to today I was GONNA show up. You don't have to have the solution you just have to. I admit it and so when you invited me to come to the show I was just like oh no I'm not passed it. I cannot talk about it and I thought to myself. Oh Good God. Woman gives the advice you need to listen to and so this is me talking through it and now it's on tape and I. I hope that if not next year in eighteen even if it takes me ten years that I can look at this can say this was the first time it was very public and open about what the journey looks like from the inside. I truly truly hope so and I love that you shared it even though you might be still going through it in different ways. And I'm so very glad jasmine that you have come on the show and talked to all the bus about it because this is exactly what I wanted. I wanted a conversation around it and I think that's exactly what we got now. I also want to wrap things up with some resources in some tools to help anybody listening right now to find the support that they need but also jasmine. You have something really cool that you actually wrote about about this on instagram. I did did and I was kind of debating whether or not I would bring it up but I think you know we can always edit. It doesn't work okay. Okay so I think that I WANNA make sure standards at testament that when you ask for help you actually get it and when you talk to people actually arrive in ways you don't expect so so this was opposed to that. I wrote on June ninth and this was shortly after the passing of Kate spade and simply Dane and I just knew that I was in a funk and I knew that I felt like if I was feeling this way probably other phillies way and unbeknownst to me that when I open myself up people not only to support and help. They started reaching out and connecting with others. But but it also been the opportunity for any to invite me onto this show so whenever you feel like you are not enough you are and whenever you feel like you need help you can always ask for it so do nine.