Caitlin Caitlin, Kate, Caitlyn discussed on Chrisley Confessions
Hi, my name is Kate running. I'm from Arkansas. And and then I second year of college. I have recently had a job here in kind of decided that I definitely don't wanna go go home because that home I have a safer other who has put up with emotionally and physically he's been for years. Just for that. Her children could have raised over her head. I am very thankful for everything. She put up with her is I don't think that I can tolerate it anymore. How do you think? I should go about telling my mom that I can't come home and with their anymore because it's not her fault. It's my dad, but I don't wanna hurt my mom because she's an amazing new. But at the same time, I unless can't handle or she. Thank you. Caitlyn? Caitlin. Caitlin caitlin. First of all like to say super proud of you for being in college. And forgetting that job offer that is amazing. Caitlyn unless you have siblings at home that your mother has to stay there. I mean, what would be wrong, and you inviting your mom to come and see you. This is what literally breaks my heart every day. It is not a child responsibility to do a parent's job. It's just not. And I feel like we hear so many stories and of women especially women now mean can be in this position as well. I'm not saying that we have had we have had H I signed that was in an abusive relationship, but women will stay in a relationship with men are whether partner for financial security because they feel like they're doing the right thing that they can't do it on their own. Absolutely. And it is so sad in this world that we don't offer the kind of support that's needed. And that women feel like they are not good enough. They're not strong enough to make the move and stand on their own. So I would encourage you lead at this point you have to lead. By example, you have to lead for your mother, you have to let her see you out here, providing for yourself moving forward being an independent strong woman and try to pull her along with you. I mean, I know it's a it's a burden to carry that. You're having to parent your parents. But unfortunately, it is what it is. And as close as I'm sure that you are to your mother, and you said wonderful things about her on this call you don't know everything your mother's been through. And I would our encourage you rather than talked to her in a manner that well, why don't you just leave him? Why don't you just go and whatever try to understand where she's coming from offer her that support system and pray that she has the strength to make the move now that you're out of the house. These kind of things just bother me on so many levels. You can't abandon your mother. Your mother didn't abandon you. And you have to Julie said you have to lead. By example, you have to let your mother know that there's a way out you have to let your dad know that there's never a right time for him to put his hands on your mother in a moment of anger or any other time you, and I've talked about this over the years that the emotional abuse is sometimes more damaging than the physical because the bruises will go away. Right. Because it almost sounds like your mother and has been beaten down so much emotionally that herself esteem is not where it needs to be. And she feels like she can't do any better. You know, that she has no way out. So you know, you are becoming a young adult. Now, you are getting educated you have a job offer. So encourage your mouth. Other just to to find that strength into to. Maybe like Todd said have her come visit you and just to give you that one on one time with her. So your relationship can transition into something other than just a mother and daughter because you're now becoming a young adult. So your your relationship takes on a different role at this point, do you as a woman as a young woman, your mother as a woman, and you become friends at this point? You can have the deepest level friendship as as to women, and you know, that things are are some of the things that your mother's been through..