Robert Welsh, Bob Welsh, Welches discussed on Behind the Bastards

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Terrify half the population if it pleases the hotdog who got. Oh god. i'm so sorry. Put take away my long coney in In the case of heinz versus the united states. He's going to have to recuse himself. I was so yes he cannot he could not want anything to do with the john. Kerry campaign frankfurter was a liberal supreme court justice which might explain. Why robert welsh so much welches biography which is quite a text says that the young robert welsh hated felix frankfurter because quote. The young man from north carolina. Recognized hogwash when he heard it and hogwash spelled in all caps and also spelled out with a dash in between each word. that's it's a fascinating That's a canterbury tales of bullshit. Right there yeah. Magnificent did someone who is with the john birch society right this biography. Oh yes absolutely yeah. They're sort of editorial style. Probably by bob welsh in nineteen twenty. Two welsh left harvard just a year before he would have graduated. He decided that he'd learned enough. And it was time to make a shitload of money and this wonder can had a specific plan for how he was going to get rich. The motherfucking candy business. Hell yeah hell. Yeah am candies. Where the money is man. You know that's the thing about candy. You get older. It stays at peeling the people of the same age. I don't know why tried to tried to tried two times that one. So bob's brilliant idea. Was something called the papa sucker the papa sucker the speaking of fast times jokes because it is what it sounds like. What would happen when you dad gets a blowjob but it was actually a caramel lollipop designed to not melt in the summer heat. That's what would happen if your dad got a blowjob straight and like your dad's penis it was filled with dangerous chemicals which is why it didn't melt in the summer heat. That's good stuff not a good to keep. You have take the rough with the smooth as they say. Dangerous chemicals it's not melting. Especially when it comes to your dad's genitals sure you take the rough with. This comes to fortunate fortunate. This is really gone on the rails. But they're not great rails. So despite the novelty of bob. Welches papa sucker. His first business named the oxford candy company did not go. Well the cause seems to have again been the fact that bob welsh did not play well with others. He had an increasing series of tents disagreements with his board of directors in nineteen twenty nine. They had a fight over what he described as their desire to reduce the quality of their products to improve. prophets welsh. Quit and again walked away. So we're getting a bit of a theme like everything. I wanna do is torture children for morality tales. He he just keeps getting into disagreements with people be they. His professors are his business partners. And then piecing the fuck out. That's that's early life. Bob welsh not an easy guy to get along with. So he's also not an easy guy to dissuade from his sacred task of selling candy. He set up another candy company. This one in berlin and money was tied Because he had a couple of kids by this point so he took a second job as a salesman for. Ej bracken sons which was one of the largest candy companies in the world. They're the people who make candy corn among other bracco. So they're it'll to. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah and their history's greatest. Monsters got corn pumpkin. They make candy pumpkin candy corn substances in a bunch of different shape. Oh yeah you mean. The little pumpkins that are made out of candy corn. Yes i do like the very specific term substance ever. It's made of which you don't know and it's just a substance so me and try to convince me that like candy. Pumpkins are better candy. Corn sucks candy. Pumpkins are good. No it's just more is saying it's a larger piece at the same terrible candidates. Just a ball you know. It is great i have this. There's this so. The person i lived with for a while is a is a chinese national in. She introduced me to this wonderful restaurant in portland. That's a chinese street food restaurant and have this dish that i'd never had before. That's just corn and fried batter and green onions cilantro. And it's fucking awesome. It's so good. Like i don't know how it's It's good incredible. But you know what. Bob welsh would really hate the idea of you living with japanese nationals. He would hate everything. As soon as i said chinese he would have started screaming. Ever the this head no. I convinced him. My friend was descended. From chiang kai shek he'd probably have been all right with that he was a big chang- head that way around. Yeah that'd be nation. Now dan leaving. Why are you running. I feel like you had that one in your head for years and then you horned it into a joke about changcai check because no if only. I'm tortured by new versions of that. Same shitty joke all day. Jordan's made the joke. Fifteen times on podcast. I've just edited out every time. Yeah you're wise to do so. This second candy company didn't work very well because it was the great depression and people didn't have disposable income for candy probably was a bad time to start a candy. Business nineteen twenty nine And his his new company fell. Apart in nineteen thirty-three fortunately bracks was still making money and he was doing well enough as a salesman that they took him on his full time employees which kept him afloat for the next year or so in one thousand nine hundred eighty four. He started his third candy company. The mid west candy company of attica indiana and unfortunately. His candy was as bad as his company's name and welches. Third enterprise failed. So he still papa suckers no he he had to give the leave the papa sucker behind when he had a fight with his business partner. So all the pompous the worst loss. That's the worst loss right there. He's not getting a dime for many of the poppas. That are getting sucked. These which is a real shame so yeah. Three failed candy companies and in nineteen thirty five. Bob welsh files for bankruptcy. Which is you know. Pretty on brand for him. It's the financial equivalent of like running away when you get into an argument. So so far everything. Scans he returns to boston. And he gets a job working for his younger brother who was also in the candy business and a lot more successful than his older brother. The o welch company was a success. And this is what finally brought. Robert welsh the wealthy desired. He was made. Vp in charge of sales and advertising and as the company grew this roberts spent years travelling across the country to offices in atlanta pittsburgh's houston los angeles and seattle. Now a wealthy man. He began racking up positions on government. Boards the boston chamber of commerce. The cambridge chamber of commerce and eventually a role is a national councillor for the us chamber of commerce is. Oh anything that is you into a right wing lunatic more than getting rich off of somebody else's work yeah especially breath sports yeah right regular right wing thing how. They all get to where they are. Go ahead sorry will just. He takes a lot of credit for the company's success but judging by the fact that he had three failed candy companies in only succeeded when he latched onto his brothers. I'm gonna guess. James was the talented the might be the case. Yeah yeah d- if i recall correctly. Didn't they make some like pretty like memorable candies. Yeah no the james o welch companies made some some of the group. All time great candies. They all sound weird. I think is yeah and they had some sort of weird sugary rope thing. i don't know they. They made a bunch of candy cows. Yeah it's not like it's not like the god fearing modern candy that we have today. It was all strange and terrifying and involve owns little nibbles those little. Cnn even sell kids something with horror in the name. Now it's just the social justice warriors. Yeah cancel coaches runamuck. And now we have our hor- hound candy.

Coming up next