Facebook, Terry, Eiffel Tower discussed on OC Talk Radio
It's good to be here once again this week doing one of my very favorite thing said interviewing friends old and new and today we have an old friend today. My guest is our good friend terrier she. It's you know it's been almost two too much terry. Since <hes> the last time we did a show together that was be because it was <hes> a new year's resolution show that we did. I don't think we've been I don't think we've we've waited this long in between seriously yeah so for those of you for what what I was GonNa say that just that reminds me. The truest truism is that when we run on the job something you lean down pick it up but when you get older and you drop something you look at it for a while and contemplate. Do I really need this and you know he and you know the fact that it is a real truism because I will down and say do. I really need that or something. I could leave for someone else. I don't know how that related up to our show back again but I'm sure I'm sure it's it it. It doesn't relate to anything except it's a good story so for those of you who are not familiar with Terry and his good story. He's he's the author of seventeen books with the new one coming out this fall <hes> he's a sought after public speaker award winning landscape architect of English Country Gardens <hes> mentor to many and the most most comfortably introverted man. I know <hes> I liked that comfortably introverted. Do you like that actually do it. That's a that's a great grace yeah yeah that's for your eulogy. I'm I'm working on it now comfortably as I like that yes so today <hes> Terry and I plan to talk about what what I'm referring to is one of the fastest growing phobias in the United State and it's being called Thommo or the fear of missing out and I think what we'll do is get right into the topic bring on Hirsch and chat about the fear of missing out you'll hirsch. What's it's up radio? I'm ready to hang on. Let me check my email. All Join US okay. That's good 'cause you. Don't WanNa miss out on what's coming. You know it's funny I could actually that's true. I could actually do the same thing even hosting the show face because I'm I'm. I'm in the post office today waiting in line which is what you do. You're waiting in line in the post the bigger places you wait in line to mail simply because that's what I'm going to mail something so you just wait mine the mail something but every single person and this is on my little eye on which is supposed to be very progressive advanced vegetable on my everybody's looking at the phone. I'm thinking what's wrong or just waiting in line. I know I know I would just talking to Settle Eddie that the club about that today so I have to get something done while I'm waiting waiting in line. I didn't get that really yeah well. How about the way tonight's where there's televisions? I've seen television. I don't go into banks anymore but I remember one time. I was in a bank and they had a television for the line so you could you could watch the latest soap opera voice. I was in your state in California and got gas in a rental car and they had tell televisions in the guest pumps I know I know they do the television guest osmose pack. That's that's usually the way that question is formed but so so I got a question for you did you. We know that the acronym Foam Oh just F. O.. M. O. is actually in the dictionary as a word I I looked it up on dictionary dot com and is defined as a feeling of anxiety or insecurity over the possibility of missing out on on something such as an event or an opportunity as in if I say no to the Party invitation I get a bad case of foam oh correct and and and if I'm not invited I get a worse case and we'll we'll talk about that. Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah. I thought I don't know I mean you're GONNA launch. In some way that I just saw I just saw tedd top this week with <hes> <hes> shorts very short called the paradox of choice and he says that we live in a world where because we have so many choices there's not freedom in it really at all it paralyzes us right and I get that he talks about you know Mike Jews wore out so I went into by jeans and when I bought these teams there was just a pair of jeans but I went in to buy jeans and there was a hundred types of genes. Oh I now he said I just want jeans and they said no you have to try and all the jeans and he said when I just had one pair teams I was able I was content with the fact that they weren't perfect jeans but they were genius but now that I had hundred choices or whatever I had to try them all on my phone some that by God they were great jeans but they weren't quite perfect. Can you say at the end I walked out after having more choices than other less satisfied had that I was with my imperfect jeans last time without and without buying any new genes your he thought he had the by the jeans but the point is he. There was nothing satisfying about having a hundred choices. Oh I know I know remember the days it was cheerios and cornflakes and that was it was all there was I read. This is a true story. I went in because I like triscuits to buy triscuits. You know there's like twelve club choices of triscuits no I I all I wanna do is triscuits the yellow box the yellow box that's love with there's no with his best to fear of missing out. In other words they give you all these choices because just in case just in case. There's something better for you so you can't walk out satisfied knowing that you missed out on something and you might have you might not have made the right choice ace but you know what that's an interesting sentence that you say it that way because he is not really a that's true. It's it's about making a correct choice or an appropriate choice rather than simply game consent yes. That's crazy that that that's crazy so I'm thinking as as preparedness I was thinking Thommo Promo f. o. m. o. but then I'm thinking about you and me and all our other introverted friends we have a we have different AC acronym. That's T. G. I.. M. Oh yeah thank God I missing out because I don't want to be involved yeah well. It's interesting thing that we were being <hes>. <hes> Um fascinating thing about all the <hes> tech companies coming under sort of scrutiny if the fact that in and they're very they're very blunt about the fact that the the programming for social media is is addict you right right it is and and we're wired that way and when that happens you're not completely satisfied and I satisfied. I mean <hes> you you can't come to a resting point never and say I am here now right. I am <hes> I don't remember who said Oh you know be here when you're here like wherever you are there yeah Yeah Mama Mama listened to me but this time of year is in other words be here right and you know I mean you know as when as when you're addicted you're not you're not dare tarred to be there because there's one is just because I wanna know read quickly what is going on and then move on because you know what you know. Drek directly tied into what you're saying or maybe exactly what you're saying is I was reading up on this Discu- on this subject <hes> I discovered that fear of missing out is is believed to be a strong driver for those who are addicted to social media which leads to what is called pathological Internet use pathological Internet use but as you said social media is designed signed to make you addicted to make you pathological so I yeah I know I know the people that that live on social media. They spend you know I have a friend. Who's WHO's WHO's sending a post? You know I don't know how I get it but I get a post. Two posts today on facebook and you know facebook is just for old people now <hes> the kids don't use it but does to post today and you know send me a picture picture of his backyard and I'm thinking cool. You know so what you're telling me if it's Perot people then facebook is for me is what you're saying yeah yeah except except I think it's a little bit over your head technically. I've really not quite so sure your luddite self could <hes> could manage your way through it. Actually I have a facebook page <hes> and a business pager personal page. No No no rob is this page and I post my saddest moment which is my blog and then I do <hes> and then I post a sort of inspirational quote but it's the fear of missing out thing. Is that <hes> it's it's because my my whole team is about what is it means to be present which means to be attentive in this moment <hes> literally to be see here. What does it mean to be here? And what is it that keeps us from just being here. What's what's going on? Why is it think about this from? I'm not that long ago. It was super bowls are so we're watching actually the super bowl this. This is supposed to be the premium of that right. You're watching premium of it I mean and and this is something you've been waiting for the advertisements during the Super Bowl then they even ah the guys the announcers divorce saying you don't WanNa miss the advertisers robots things. You don't WanNa miss what were happening in the future while you're at the thing you're supposed to be not wanting to miss. I ah it amazed me. That's the way we're wired. You'RE GONNA have to help me with that. I kind of didn't that that I'm thinking in the advertisement is about the future and I were whereas I'm not focusing on the president here. I am at the event I'm I can't I have been waiting to be at the event. I've been waiting to be and the advertisement. I'm supposed to watch his you. Don't WanNa miss what's coming ahead at this thing. Make make your right and I think wait a minute. I met the thing I've been WANNA miss. Why do I want to focus on this next thing? I go on a miss when I met. I didn't WanNa Miss Yeah. That's a great observation. That's a great observation. You know I was thinking I was thinking as I was pondering this. This it really is kind of a complex sub- subject and I was. I was thinking you know there's Thommo light may be and foam. Oh pathological and I'm thinking Komo light in this way. Tell me if you think this is foam allied or if this is Komo pathological and it's a common problem for aw travellers especially <hes> foreign international travelers and there is this uneasy feeling that you get if you don't see all the pertinent sites of of the trip that you were supposed to enjoy and somehow your trip is incomplete if you don't see it now so as an example I'm thinking of like Paris you know what is it and you. You know I came up with four things you you know you gotta see the Eiffel Tower lose the Notre Dame and the Palais Si- <hes> there's you know there's others that you could add to that but <hes> you know after having been to Paris few times that it really I never went back to the Eiffel Tower. I could care or less about the Eiffel Tower just a big hunk of steel.