A new story from The Bill Simmons Podcast


I like that pick. Who do you got, Craig? I wouldn't accept money from Michael Pittman this year. I don't want anything to do with that. That was your number one guy last year. That was that was your the pendulum. You're my true love last year. Yeah, it was. It didn't exactly work out. Not exactly his fault. I still think he's a good player, but I just I don't love Anthony Richardson on the ground is maybe the best running quarterback we've ever seen through the air. He might be the worst. And I don't like anything I've seen in the preseason from Richardson passing. This offense on the Colts this year feels like the Bears last year. It's going to be like running the Navy offense. I don't want anything to do with Michael Pittman. He's way too expensive. Also, you didn't mention this piece of Pittman. I mean, not not the most durable guy. And Richardson has a couple of those throws like I'm wide open over the middle. Now I'm jumping up for the pass that's over my head and I'm getting blasted by safety. Stay away. So I really wanted to take Jonathan Taylor here. But there is the McCaffrey 2022 trade possibility where all of a sudden he's on some awesome team and somebody has him for 19 bucks and fears. So I'm not taking him. So I was really proud of this pick. It's Kadarius Toney. So there's three outcomes for a fantasy receiver like Kadarius Toney, right? One is he just never lives up to the hype and it's just super disappointing and you just regret that you take him. The second is that it's amazing and it actually works out. And he plays 16 weeks, including the playoffs, when you need him those last three. And it's just you struck while you hit a home run. And then there's the third one, which is the worst, which is the guy who tempts you, he tantalizes you with two or three weeks where he has like in week four, he has six catches for 190 yards and three TDs. You're like, oh, my God, I did it. I fucking landed on the moon with Kadarius Toney. And then in week seven, the red flags up. And then it's like he missed an injury rehab session. He's been suspended by the team for 72 hours and then he misses week eight. And then there's another injury. And then now he's just hogging my roster spot because I have no idea if he's going to come back or not. But he was the guy that had 190 yards in week three. So I have to hold on. I don't want it. I'm out. I'm just out. I don't want to deal with it. I still dream about I still dream about his game against Dallas in 2020. I believe it was week four. He had like 150 yards. He looked like the best receiver I've ever seen in my life. That one. I still think about that game and I still hope to get there one day. You know what? Kadarius Toney is a drug. He's kind of like Salvia. He distorts time because Craig and DK talk about Kadarius Toney's greatness, like Michael Thomas's greatness, except, you know, Salvia, it's like 10 minutes. It feels like three hours. I'm like, dude, he had two good games like two years ago. And I'm just I'm completely he was also like the third most important player on the Chiefs in the Super Bowl. Mind you. And she won them the game. The Chiefs played him for like five steps in the game. He was in two weeks to prep him for the game. Oh, my. Don't even get me started. You know what he is? What? He's the new Josh Gordon. I mean, different, different issues, but he's just so tantalizing and teams talk themselves into him. And you just I just don't trust it. I don't hear Josh Gordon, but he's allowed to play. But he just does it anyway. This this category is called I wouldn't take him even if he was free. He practically is. You can get him for a dollar or two. Who cares? It's worth a flyer. But it's a gateway drug. This is the problem with the Chiefs, DK, as I look at them big picture, because I talked about this Lombardi on Sunday, but I picked them in the Super Bowl last year. And the theory was their receivers are just good enough and Mahomes is so great and their offensive line is going to be good that he'll make it work. But now I feel like we've passed the point of no return to the to the degree that if they don't hit with Tony or one of their rookies doesn't actually, like, blossom into a major, major dude who's catching the ball than Kelsey? I cannot figure it out. Who's that? What receiver do you trust the most than the Chiefs? Probably Sky Moore, but again, we haven't really seen him yet. You know, he played in the Super Bowl. Yeah, he he lined up wrong in the Super Bowl and still caught a touchdown. But to me, yeah, I think so. The curious Tony thing is more of a bit than us being actually serious, but he I will say the way he moves is very, totally a bit. He's he does. He has rarely watch him play. He's like, all right, this guy's pretty special. And I was on the sideline. I think the one thing that the one actual analytical thing I will say about him is I think he's good on the scramble plays on the broken plays when Mahomes gets outside of pocket, extends plays. And that's really a huge part of Mahomes game. Tony's always seems to be in the right place when those plays happen. Maybe it's because he's in the wrong place where he was supposed to be running. But to me, that's the one like actual analytical thing I would say, other than he moves differently than everyone else on the field is. That's what gets me excited about. Craig, you know what? Fantasy football is enough pain and heartache and self-doubt and hating yourself. I don't need to also bring Kadarius Tony into that. I don't need to be tantalized by this talented dude. All right, next category.

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