United States, Mike Brown, California discussed on The Two Of Us

The Two Of Us


And its relationship to creativity mental health and emotional well-being. And as always I'd like to give a trigger warning these are adults show. So the themes will be complex and interesting and maybe at some times be triggering if you've attended this position today put this on pause and bookmark it for later. Otherwise Dive Right In today. I'm actually Overjoyed to be introduced and what's going to call you my long lost friend chocolate the Friendship has gone. It's just the you're in another part of the world than you used to be absolved. And you're in a country with its own challenges some of these say that so you should say that that's a understatement but yes, yes ton of challenges. I would say so you're in the this United States of America. I am I am in and not only am I in the United States. I'm in the middle of Silicon Valley Home in California, which I think the last time I I looked this up the the sort of if it was if California was its own country club in terms of the money generated, it would be the 7th most sort of profitable country in the world will be number seven. Which has its own problems. I found that quite a stunning fact. I've been enjoying some of your poems on Instagram and I'm like, oh, I can't quote the whole oshaka. I won't about the one of the poems. I just think is phenomenal is the poem. You said you might change the title of it is the one called stuck. Oh, yeah is a perm and a half and is it? Is it is it you don't know what Devils had to be tamed for me to be here now. Yeah, it was. Yeah, it was even who just saying that it you know off the Genesis of stuck was you know, and it's it's it's tied to all that's going on now with with the police brutality and and and I wouldn't even say its BLM but it's off, you know, I was sitting here God there's so many different aspects to this but there's this idea that you know back order for as a young as a black person coming up in in in the United States and police brutality and just all of these things that you sort of wage order to move forward. It's almost like you've got a tuck this stuff away. It doesn't it doesn't mean that you forget about it or anything of that sort, but you can't move into this world. I mean it's dead. It's a racist environment is a racist. Well, you can't move through it if you're attaching all if if you've got it all stuck to the outside of your body, then everything's going to stick off. So you almost have to tuck it away. The problem with that is that there's these moments like this like Mike Brown like almond dobre like off George Floyd Brianna Taylor that make these things pop back out, right and you've got to figure out how to manage that and manage the anger and the same ad and the fear and all of that and then tuck it back away cuz I got to get up and go to work the next day. I've got a raise a child. I've gotta do all of those things and that's what kind of the stuck came home. Right? Cuz it's all it's all kind of stuck and there's one day I was sitting here and just randomly this wealth of emotion Port over me, and I'm dead. Crying and and it wasn't for any one particular thing and what it really when I sort of peeled away the the layers I've put stuck so many things away. I didn't remember how many of them they were and how many times I had. I I could have been the Mike Brown's I could have been to George fluids, right the amount of times that things have happened just walking down the street and police stopping me are being pulled over in a car and and I've written about it here and there but it was just moment when it all came and I think to a certain level. I suppress this memory of these four policemen, you know running up on me in my apartment. I was carrying Pizza. I had a pizza box and my key is coming into my apartment and You know it just it I think I partly suppress it. But in that moment, it came back full fledged. Like I remember seeing the nozzle of the guns Irish, and and I think what all of this sort of brought up in me is how easily You know, you know there's another poem I have as about a a stop at a police car and the whole idea that I don't even know this guy. Bob understand the I I do understand the language his uniform speaks, right? And there's a line in there where I said, you know, I'm wondering all these things one of which is I'm wondering how quickly this Earth beside the car could bury me right? And so in that same sense, it's sort of like I I sort of like went right back to that moment and it was just a month which that could have been, you know, it could have been completely different and I tried to capture it in that poem stuck while it was here while it was you know, while it was Earthbound so to speak and that's where that that sort of poem kind of came out of and sort of like, let me let me catch it now before I stick it away I thought It's really important cuz we were talking before the interview talk about started about the thought impact of the afterworld on our inner World in a very broad way and that poem describes it really well. And I remember having a conversation with a friend of mine who's a photographer and we were talking about different sorts of oppressions to the body and that the more privileged you have the less you need to erect an invisible force field around yourself off when you enter into that world and entering into that world doesn't mean when you leave the house. It means everything including your computer your television, even when you close your eyes so that force field means stuck that force field means the burial of feelings in order to do that. You say dog Take your kids to school get the milk from the store right brush your teeth.

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