James, Cordelia discussed on Stephanie Trussell

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

I cried for a week after i look at the german girl whose business it is not she is strong a little heavy in the hips i am the age of her grandfather i do not want to talk about her dog killed in this doctor's office i turn back to dizzy please come in i say but as he says no she has cooked my food cleaned my house picked up after james for so many years i cannot count her job is to do as i ask but she will not do this i can't she says and she is pleading so i go back alone to the room where cordelia is on the table her eyes look at nothing james was right to bring her home to give me something to take care of you look terrible the vet tells me sit down the nurse brings me a glass of water and says something comforting i think of james long life together his shoot trees in the closet his clothes on the floor the dog is the last string to tie me to him and now snoop soon i will start walking into the bedroom staring at nothing listening for voices that are not there it's your decision the vet says i nod you can hold her the nurse says and she puts cordelia into my arms then she puts a pad on my leg like a diaper beneath the dog and i think this will be bad cordelia sniffs my hand licks it once i am no longer sure about the quality of her life she could still smell the world she can still love but then i remember the morning her legs not holding.

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