PHD, Facebook, Sash Papa discussed on Papa Phd Podcast

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I'm trying to figure out the way to say this but basically people who are going to take all of our attention freely and and that's really comforting when you don't want to take care of yourself and so thinking about people who really support me are able to be honest with And who is a mutual interest in in being friends And then you know just prying I think another big piece. I adopted a couple of dogs in at the start of my third year or at the start of my fourth year Everyone said that was a terrible idea. And that was one of the few times that everyone was wrong. Going back to that idea of taking care of myself You know if you have a pet you don't have a choice of not getting up in the morning. You don't have a choice of staying in your house all day long and things like when they have to eat twice a day so I should probably eat at least twice a day. You know and and companionship so those pieces that we tell people that sound so fluffy of like have a support system get enough sleep or you know be introspective. Those are often the hardest. They really are the pieces that matter. I was asking about family because for sure. It's one another thing that when you're abroad doing a PhD or just in another state if you are able to keep an open connection with your family for sure it's it's something that that can help depending on people's relationships with their families of course but well again we're in the in the middle of the covy pandemic People are more are talking more with their families than they have been in the past ten because of this strange and stressful situation Super grateful that you're sharing this with us and with the listeners. Because I believe the numbers show that a lot of the students out there are going through similar things and be it beat and panic attacks anxiety depression and these are in a way. They're insidious things like you were saying of all things the even lead you to not want to go get the help that you need. It's really really a big challenge for someone alone to deal with it so I would say and I always try to say if you're somewhere. Maybe far from family but during his university has resources counseling etc. And you feel that you need help in the genetic being able to deal with something. Just use those services and as much as possible because you need to. You need to take care of you. I and I would say also You know I think even though I get a lot of help I support. I still have a hard time thinking of it as getting help and so I started re framing it in my own mind of whenever I want to be more efficient whenever I want to be more effective getting support makes you more of both of those things so I think it's a little bit silly for us to use a reference manager when I'm writing a paper because I don't want to type in every single reference and have to change it around. I don't see that it's getting help. I feel that as I am effectively using tools that I have available and I think that's a big pieces that you know in Grad School. We are taught to seek out collaborators. Were taught to look up the best newest information and I think that this is a great way to do it. You know not that. The reason to get help should really be Improving your work but I think that it can be a good way to get started. Especially if you're not sure. Do I really need this kind of help or or am I just whining Probably you're thinking do I need help you do but You know just to get started. I would say think about it as how can I be more effective? How can I get more out of my life And and those kind of tools are really really great an analogy. That just came to my mind was. Phd is like a marathon and athletes go to the clinics to learn to jump farther little farther to run a little bit more efficient and they go to specialists to help them to do to do these things better and to go for that gold medal. And I think there's an equivalent there and it's a very very long winded effort. It's normal to get physically and mentally tired so you know what go get him brain massage so you can wake up next day and and be better you and get back on track for sure for sure that we're reaching the half point but you mentioned that one of the turning points it. I think this is really important. I really believe deeply giving back to to your community. You came from and helping others is a great way to grow and you mentioned that the turning points of when you you kind of went over this bump of of being in a in a kind of a dark place was you said. I decided to start helping other people. Can you just talk about what that is? And so we kind of tease. What's coming up in part to shore so it actually kind came from the fact that I had been doing some science communication stuff with a local planetarium. I was able to get excited about my own science again because I I did. Some hands on stuff with kids And then the start of my fourth year I I started to actually train other scientists to do these sort of pork chops and things and I and I realized that although I felt like I didn't have much to offer I did have skills. I did have experiences that other people could learn from an and that made me feel really good and during that winter and actually in January February. Some some new literature came out. That really opened up a new opportunity where I could take those really bad experiences that I had and and hopefully help people in a way that I wish that I had been supported. So we'll maybe talk a little bit more about how that kind of gelled into something into into a project that you're working on today but I'm really thankful that of you sharing your story and hope the listeners are enjoying the episode and taking notes because again I myself went abroad to study and you can be very alone and if you can get tools from people who've gone through the same problems we're going through. It can be kind of a shortcut to not fall into the same pitfalls. So thank you and and this you if you enjoy the insights shared on the show each week and would like to dig deeper into some of the subjects covered you can join the PhD Postgraduate Career Exploration Group. 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