193. Rebecca Crow - People need to actually just listen to sex workers
I record a lot of these intros and an actress ahead of time sometimes said that. I do like a like bulk recordings at one time and you may feel like it would be better more authentic if I recorded The intro every week so that I would be a lot more up-to-date than I am then. Today is a good example of. Why do not do that in theory? I well I'll just tell you what my I don't know. Should I do a trigger warning from my introduction? I don't know check the check. The description the episode notes if all the trigger warnings essentially dysfunctional family and death. I think is the is the headline in terms of the twitter warnings. I just woke up. It's a Monday morning. I'm still in bed so this I guess the sound quality of this introduction is worse than could have been because I'm not using my fence and microphone because I'm using my phone and recording in bed. I. That's a call the hospital today because my grandmother was at the hospital three days ago and we were told that She was going to basically die like they. Would you know they asked about the whole? Do not resuscitate thing. And she's ninety six years old she can handle medicine anymore. And so basically we've been mourning for three days now and I mean going through talking about memories and all the things you do you know. She's in Denmark. And there's a lockdown we we we couldn't go and see her and all those things and so we've just really been you know acting as if she's more or less own already dead and then we then we haven't heard anything so. I called the hospitals today. You know really preparing myself at 'cause I don't know how I'm GonNa react to this because she's I. I did read about dysfunctional families. And what happens when someone dies? That was it's so difficult isn't it because she is. There was the person that you thought they were when you were a child and you didn't know better. And then this the person that they probably actually were but due to their own trauma in their own shit they became toxic. And then there's the person you then this that you also mourning the loss of the possibility that maybe they could change and everything would be fine and then you also just warning that the fact that their life probably wasn't as good as it should have been so. There's a lot happening and at the same time. It was the the freedom of not having to deal with hers Psychopath Sadistic Husband you know knowing that I have no connection to him anymore and then also just wondering what was going to happen like the so much in you know. It's my grandmother's almost morning for the people that love her even though she made. I don't know I don't know how to describe who that's the thing. 'cause she was definitely. I did a whole show about her. The dead baby frog show was a lot about her And her psychopath husband. Very abusive husband Guess I'm saying that. This is so complicated. And how how do you deal with death in a in a dysfunctional family? And you know and it's someone that you haven't I've not been in contact with for years because I mean she. Yeah I guess she turned out to also have been a bit of a bit of a ticket as well. Anyways I called the hospital Because the last thing we heard was three days ago when her husband psychopathic abusive spend called and said that she was admitted and she was GonNa die soon and of course he made it all about him. The reason he called for him it was like. Oh this is so hard on me. And she's GonNa she's going to die and that means that I'm Gonna. I'm just going to have to kill myself because she was my everything and I know this this could potentially sound like oh a loving husband. Input Trust me. That is not what this is. It is fully about him getting the attention At a therapist. One say that it was very strange that he didn't Have Mun chosen by proxy You know the the illness where you make people sick so that you can get attention I called the hospital and the nurse was like. Oh yeah she's she's sitting in She's a sitting in a chat eating some breakfast joking around. All the doctors love going to see her because she's laughing she makes them laugh so much and she's so funny and the yeah. Thanks is going to go come home today and I said Oh but we. We would tell that she was going to tell the she was probably GonNa die within a couple of days in the nose went. What's no no no no no? That's not at all where we're at and I was like okay. Cool and as you said who told you that it was that a nurse and I said No. It's a piece of shit husband who's kind like. Oh no no. That's what's happening. Not laughing at you. Don't work she you know she opponent assumed that it was a normal situation was just like. I don't know what to do because we've all we've all sat goodbye over the calls of the week and we've been moaning and watching her favorite films dealt with it the way we could a now. Oh my God what I guess. My point was just that that if I'd call the hospital and they told me she was had passed away then. I don't know what kind of mood I would have been because I don't actually know how I'm Gonna I'm GonNA react. And then I would have had to do this. Introduction this guys who who the fuck knows. Okay that is my current situation. It has been a very weird time and also. I hope this doesn't sound like I'm in any way being This disrespectful insensitive to people who who do not have strange family relations have actually lost someone during this pandemic because that I mean even though mine is horrific too complicated and all of that I I still felt sadness Deep sadness mostly just because of yeah. I don't know if someone you justify why you feel sad when someone dies but I I'm just saying I my my heart goes out to my my love. My sympathy my empathy. I Dunno goes out to you. If you have actually law someone recently and it was just someone really cool. I am very sorry about that. I'm also very sorry to the people who have lost family members where it's complicated because it is the weirdest thing in the world just all of the feelings and the I have no regrets which I'm quite relieved over no regrets cutting them from my life. This has been one. Hell of an introduction is basically me being well some would say too honest Put that's whatever you can hear in my vice. Whatever you can whatever your perception of this introduction is that is the background. I'm in bed. It's Monday morning up just cold. A Danish hospital and had a chat with a very laughing nurse was told me that I've been mourning for nothing for three days now because piece of shit abusive psychopathic sadistic husband wanted attention so he rammed up how bad it was. Uh Us so that we would feel bad for him. it's tiring. I did a interview at the site note. Science Museum in London was talking to an amazing who'd written a book about robots. And we during the Cuban a a woman as those young Name the women woman in the audience stood up and asked about Something to do with sex work and robots and about honestly. I don't remember the exact question but is on twitter. If you go back a bit and I was so happy I was like yes. How Ya we're at the Science Museum? You know who is going to bring up sex work and I was so happy. Oh yes and then and the author the book. The robot expert was happy as well as like yes and it was such a lovely feminist moment. It was Rebecca who is our guest. Nfl and on twitter. And I guess it's a year ago maybe more but she's finally done the podcast during this down and she's just really really cool driven intelligent peasant and she says brilliant ended so important. It's so important to support a has say it's so important to support sex workers it is. It's one hundred. It is but that. Sounds almost patronizing as if. I'm supporting her by letting her do. My as that is not at all what this is. I am very lucky that she wanted to talk to me and Yeah just be of an amazing guests on this on this podcast. I'm just very happy to have Tony. Shit this has been one hell of an introduction. He's God please. Please enjoy my conversation with the incredible.