A highlight from Decisions That Should Wait

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Good morning good afternoon. Good evening wherever you find yourself in this entire world. I welcome you. So how are you doing. My friend my warrior. I certainly hope this week has given you a little more sense of peace. So today i wanted to share something with you a new site just four podcast so the address is www dot the mary. Mac show dot com appropriately. And i hope you'll take a moment to go there and see the new site and please do subscribe in the upper right hand corner to the podcast platform that you prefer. And also to rate and review the podcast. I know we have people from sixty different countries around the world. And i'd love to know how this has helped you. We have received wonderful reviews from ferry loyal listeners. And i wanna thank them so much for taking the time to review the podcast next. I wanted to remind you that. The mary max store has some beautiful products for yourself and others who are bereaved to give them as gifts or for yourself. So thank you for taking some time to look at that and you can find that at store. Mary mack died info sooner today. I like to talk to you about decisions. That should wait now. What do i mean by that. Well there are things in life that may need attending to after the data of someone very close to you. But i don't want you to do them quickly. Some of those choices are moving to a new home making decisions about their possessions deciding when to return to work for yourself or perhaps getting a new job finding a new location a completely new city or town that you might want to move to major financial merv such as selling your home and how you going to invest the proceeds of perhaps a life insurance policy. That was left her. You also what about all the investments you do have. And how would you like to handle those moving forward. You'd also need to create a new will for yourself especially if one of your children have died. Or if you've lost a spouse you might need a trust now and also a d. r. order. Do not resuscitate for yourself so these are certain things that will address today. But you have to remember that grief takes great toll on us. Not just our emotions also. Our physical body are spiritual sense and also the financial areas of our life. We need to tread lightly and care for ourselves. We need to be gentle with ourselves. We need to realize that most decisions we make after such a difficult loss will take time and consideration and that doesn't mean they should be handled overnight. We wouldn't want it to. There are many changes. That happened for us. After we've lost someone. Our relationships with the people in our lives can change. We might feel that. We are grieving in a different way than they are any different periods of time. You may be walking on eggshells around your husband ever since. Her child died because one day. You're happy and the next day you're not and then the reverse happens for him. Your priorities change your interest even change and goals. You have that you one set with your spouse they no longer exist and now you have to look at your goals again. They may be completely different now. You might find that you enjoy tiffen friendships than your traditional ones. People that you might have met. Ed support group tend to bring you more happiness. They understand you better and so your relationships will change. Also your routines change. If you're taking care of your spouse. And he was dying. There was a long stretch there when you were the caregiver and now that responsibility and that routine is no longer needed and there's a sense of asking yourself who am i right now. I used to be a spouse. I used to be a wife or a husband. I used to be a caregiver and now who am. I really don't know anymore and the routines that we had before how we gave them the medication and when we bring them outside and when they will be bathed all of those things are no longer there for you. They're not a priority. Obviously that's not something you need to attend to any longer. And also when a spouse dies or a family member we take on different responsibilities. We may not have taken on earlier for instance if you were not the person who handled all the finances then you need to learn that skill if you were in the one who drove all around you might have to learn that skill. Also i remember. When my aunt became a widow my uncle pete he would be the one who trove them everywhere and she had to relearn how to drive which helped her with. I was glad to do it. She needed to be independent. She needed to know that she could go wherever she needed to go by herself safely. And that was important to me if you were wife or husband and it was your partner. Who was the breadwinner. And that was your decision. Someone stayed home with the young children. Then maybe since their death you need to reevaluate what needs to be done. Maybe the children need to go in daycare. Because you need to go back to work for yourself to bring in enough money for the family now. The death of a family member cambrian gray changes in your financial world. You might have also received social security benefits for both of you at least here in the states or a pension of some kind from companies or utilities or even government agencies that you worked for and those pensions mako away. Now that the person who brought in that pension money is no longer here.

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