Are You Becoming a Narcissist or Echoist - 575
On opposite ends of an extreme spectrum. And you probably are familiar with the term narcissism, and what it means to have a narcissistic personality, which is actually considered a personality disorder in the second part of the show I'm going to go into deeper detail on narcissism on the other end of the spectrum, though are what is known as Echo West and to be clear I I. Don't think that this is a disorder that's recognized by psychologists. It's kind of a concept. If you will. An Echo is someone who's made to make other people uncomfortable. They don't want to be uncomfortable themselves. They want to take up as little space as possible. Sometimes even if it's positive, right like they, they don't like to feel sad lonely or scared echoes ten to bury their own feelings and opinions. because. They just want everything to stay the same. To maintain status quo in their own lives echo as tend to be more sensitive emotionally. They're more vulnerable I should say to anyone's opinion of them. Researchers suggest that people who are considered equis are people who feel others opinion of them, very. Intensely like they, they cannot let go of a negative comment about themselves even if they no has like zero basis in reality. Now, when people develop close relationships with Narcissus. Especially in Echo S., they tend to bend to their needs. So if you have a narcissistic parent, you know that it's them all the time. It's everything you're you restructure your whole life to make sure that that person has everything. They need not to get upset. You learn to anticipate what's going to set them off, and then you avoid it. You can almost think of someone who. Is An echo west. As someone who's afraid to be a nurse assist, it's someone who it's like being humble to a fault. The term was coined by clinical psychologists Craig Milken. He's. And? He writes on them and narcissism. Here are some of the common traits of someone who is an echo west. They're afraid to take up any space. An Echo will avoid at all costs having the spotlight on them even to subtly college. Their accomplishments makes them feel like they're very selfish, very undeserving. They feel guilty they. They don't WanNA compliment. They certainly aren't going to make stance. So you know, I think about right now. How there's so much I guess you could say it. Anger towards those who are being silent about their beliefs like they. They believe black lives matter. They believe that people should not be going out whatever it is. They believe they're not gonNA say anything right now. Because they just are paralyzed by the fear of the attention on them, whether it's positive or negative, the second characteristic of someone who's an Echo Esther has echoes traits is a tend to have pretty low self esteem, which is interesting because so to do narcissist. An Echo West. This sounds like a pretty noble trait, but everybody else comes first before them. They'll take care of everyone else's problems. In fact, their life will revolve around fixing things for everyone else, even when it's at the cost of their own well-being. Now because an echo s doesn't want, attention doesn't want to be a to be about them. They have needs and desires because they're human being but. It's almost like a double standard, because they take care of everybody, else's needs and desires before they'll take care of their own, so they often will. Unfortunately neglect themselves when it comes to take care of themselves. Echoes tend to have very high levels of anxiety. As you can imagine, because everyone has an opinion, everyone has beliefs. Everyone has biases. We all have judgment we all. We have these things inside of us. But an echo west is so afraid of how that will make them appear. That they will push those things down, and those things have to come out someplace, so they come out in the form of anxiety, anxiety attacks, panic attacks auto immune disorders. Not surprisingly echoes tend to have poor boundaries. They say yes when they know they. Agree to disagree. They don't speak up. They don't take a side. They don't stand up. They don't. They don't do anything that's GONNA. Call too much attention to them. Echoing are considered to be deliberately and intentionally self effacing me. This is the person when you meet and you're like. Oh! I heard a lot about your. You're like Oh i. don't know who they were talking about, wasn't me they. will go out of their way. And may even doggedly talk about themselves. So that they can prove to you. Listen I am not self centered. It is not about me. I'm humble. I'm just like you don't pay attention to me like I. Don't think I'm special. What's interesting is when we get to the part about narcissism when I looked up things about narcissism. Here's the deal. We all have both of these traits before go much further you have some echo wisdom in you, and you have some narcissism in you where it gets dangerous is when we are in ECO list or a narcissist like that's who we are. We all have a little some of these traits. I know I've done that I. Know I've met. Someone said Oh. They're the amazing one. That's so nice of you to say. Look I've tried to downplay it so that they can I guess for this very same reason so that they don't form the opinion that I think highly of myself. Even though I do think highly of myself because I'm confident person, it's confusing. I think you understand. The dangers are when we take these things to the extreme, an echo west lives their life by the rule that they cannot and should not ever ask anyone for help because they would be noticed, that would take the attention from something else. Someone else's working on and put it on them, and it's just an unconscious strategy. To avoid rejection, it's an unconscious, very conscious way sometimes of distracting yourself from your own demands and worries, and making sure that no one else has to worry about you to. ECHO is are constantly afraid that if they have a need it will appear to others is other being selfish. When it's important to speak up. When you have an opinion when you can see that there is wrongdoing, an echo west will step back and be quiet. Hoping that someone else is going to do that work for them, because they can't handle the thought of either being wrong and people thinking they're being self centered. They can't. They can't handle the thought of having all that attention on them and the scariest place in the world for someone who's an echo west is to be placed on a pedestal, so you will rarely, if ever find someone who's an echo west. WHO's an outspoken thought leader in can happen? You will rarely see them as guru ain't. GonNa Happen You rarely see them. As the CEO or a a major leader in can happen, they may be in powerful circles, but rarely will they be the leader? And when it happens almost accidentally, they are constantly apologizing for it and doing everything in their power to express their humility. This may be the first time you've ever heard that. Term described or explained, and I'm wondering if you see some of those traits in you at times. Or are you all of those traits? Do you know other people who fall into that category of of thinking and behaving?