The breakup is not a personal attack. It's what's best for that person. -
Automatic TRANSCRIPT
And just mental capacity when things don't work out. And let's face it, no one wants to prepare for a relationship to be doomed. It's just, that's what happens. Some part of our lives on our journey. And what do you do? Recently, I recorded an audiobook. How to turn a breakup into a breakthrough, and move on like a boss. And it's really a mental thing. You don't have to be a boss and a company or anything like that, but the attributes of a boss. Being in control, taking charge, going after what you want, getting to business, project management, you can take attributes of a boss and apply it to your emotional side. Because we don't want to stay in that space, right? It's not good there. If you stay too long at that space, all you're going to do is get depressed. If you look in the future based on that space, all you're going to do is feel anxious and we don't want you to feel anxious, we want you to be in the present and be your best. And I wanted to speak to people who often get overlooked. I find that sometimes we keep it a little a little bit more surface a little bit more general when it comes to talking about dealing with a breakup. Not everyone has handled it in a model way, you know, not everyone becomes friends, not everyone is able to just get up out of bed, brush their teeth, start their day without feeling like they're dying inside. Not everyone understands no is no. And you have to stop contacting me, stop acting like we're still together. And I wanted to bring that together in a safe space for people who are in different areas of the spectrum of accepting a breakup. Understand the triggers of what caused the breakup, the duels and don'ts of what you don't want to do that's only going to make things worse for yourself and what you can do to heal and move on. Granted, you might be the person who might still have a chance with someone. But I didn't want to focus on that. That's your journey to decide. This is about someone who it is clearly over and you are struggling to get a hold of it. You might look put together on the outside is still doing the same things, still getting your coffee, tea, going to the gym, getting your hair done. You still doing the routine on the outside, while on the inside, you're dying inside, and we don't want that. You have the capacity to heal. You have the ability to thrive in life and to move on. And what do we often do? Let's see who we can get involved in our life to kind of distract us, try that. Let's DM someone. Let's flirt with someone and see what happens. Try that. And everything that you've tried has not worked, and you find yourself going around in circles and more frustrated as time goes by. And I just wanted to, in my own life, I've dealt with people who haven't accepted a breakup. And I know how that felt on my end. Was I not direct enough? Why is this happening? Why are you so why are you still there, why are people stalking people? Why are people abusing people shaming people airing dirty laundry or trying to get them jealous? Like, why are you doing these things trying to embarrass them? Why are you doing these things when the breakup is really not personal? It's not a personal attack. It's what's best for that person. So either if you're the person that's struggling to accept the breakup, you're hurting, you want desperately that person back. You want that person back or you just don't know what to do. There's something for you in this book. And there's something for you. There's jewels of advice for you in this book. And my goal wasn't to make someone feel ashamed of how they feel, but to feel comfortable knowing that you know what? I've been trying to deal with this on my own, but I don't have to tools. I don't know what to do. I'm going to my usual moves in my own mental survival kit, but it's not working. I need new energy. I need a new way of thinking. How to do this in my life. And it can be tough when you feel like just abruptly something drastic happens in your life. And you don't know what to do. It's uncomfortable. The pattern was unexpected, even if you had an idea, you didn't think it was going to happen right now. So I just want to encourage you that it's not too late, and it's not too late for you, but we have to get you to focus on you right now. It's time to check out of the usual routine the things that you're doing and let's get to work. Because life still needs you. And it's about being motivated to live life. And this is just a small step in your life and there's so much more to come and I want that for you. So if you are dealing with a breakup or could have been a year ago, it could have been ten years, 20 years ago, isn't it time to get back to you? Isn't it time to laugh again? Get those laughs back. Get whatever you feel like you lost from that relationship back in your life. Get some your smile dance again, you know? So I hope this is able to help you. If you are looking for something to listen to, I encourage you to check it out. I just thought about how grew some it can feel sometimes. How you can feel isolated with your pain. And I didn't want that feel. I wanted to write a book to help people no longer feel isolated with their pain, but to feel inspired to come out of their shell and heal and move forward in their life. There's one thing to tell someone you got this, go for it, you'll be okay, but I wanted to take it a step further and help put steps in place to help you know how to do that. Be your own hero, you have the capacity to save yourself. You just have to look and see that you are wearing a life