A highlight from Disenfranchised Grief I

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Good morning good afternoon. Good evening wherever you find yourself in this entire world. I welcome you. How are you doing my friend. My warrior. I certainly hope this week is better for you. I thought you'd like to know that we've added three more countries that have signed on to listen to our show. We now have audience in botswana in africa and nepal in asia. And we're very happy that you could join us. We're now up to fifty four countries and one of the things that i very much like for you to do for me is to go to my website. Mary mack dot info and sign up to be on my mailing list. You can do that in the left hand column. you'll see a book. Click on the book and add your name email and where you're from and this way will always be able to stay in touch unfortunately in the united states there's a censorship that's going on here and we never know who's next in line to lose their platform and i don't want that to happen to us so it would mean a lot if you go onto the site. Mary dot info sign up for my newsletter and this way will always be in touch through email. Thank you for that. I really appreciate it now. Another thing i'd like to share with you. If you're not aware is recently i started. An ecommerce store is called the merry macs store appropriately. And i wanted you to know about it. Excellent gift that you may either give to yourself or to someone that you love who is grieving. The death of a loved one and it's a beautiful heart of gold mug. That's what we call it and it has the words i remember underneath it so beautiful. And if you go to the merrimack store or you can just go to marry mac dot info and find the tab that says store at the top. It'll bring you there and you can look under the heart of gold collection and find the beautiful mug. I really hope you'll take the opportunity to pick one up or to send it on to someone who would love it. Thank you so today. I'd like to talk about disenfranchised grief now if you've never heard of that before let me explain what that is. It's grief that is not acknowledged by society and you might say to yourself. Well what exactly is that. And what it is is different types of grief for instance when you have a suicide death. Or maybe someone's overdosed. People make us feel less than because of the way the person died. Ore they make us feel less than because we can not ourselves to that particular person so as we move forward. I'll give you all different examples of that. In february of two thousand and nine. I was interviewed for oprah magazine by a lovely reporter. Who wrote an article about this and in this article. I explained exactly what disenfranchised grief was and how to help oneself. When you're going through that in your life there are times when we're mourning. The death of a loved one and people in society will make us feel and we ourselves may feel guilty because we think we should be grieving for the staff. Maybe it's not our place. Maybe they don't have the right label but regardless your grief for anyone who has died is valid. That person meant something to you and it is appropriate to mourn them in a way. That feels right to you. So let me give you an example of disenfranchised grief safe for instance. Your ex pows has passed away. Maybe you're married for twenty five years but because of infidelity your marriage died. He remarried and that woman. Maybe she was a friend of yours. Maybe she was someone you absolutely knew. And you couldn't believe that he would fall right back into a marriage with someone like that but soon after he married he developed cancer and now two years later he's passed away. So exactly what do you do. Of course you had feelings for him. Sometimes when you love someone most times it doesn't go away unless you've been severely hurt and you might even have children with that person and they are grieving for the death of their father. But you're really not sure how you're supposed to take this. So if this has happened to you some are congratulating you for his death because they saw all he put you through and you did feel back to a degree but you have children with him. How are you going to support them through the death of their father now. People just didn't understand why you actually retrieving so you lost the support system that you really could have used. Your friends. couldn't see why you would even want to mourn that death and so they pulled away from you when you needed their support. What happens if the person is engaged to you. You're not really the spouse or maybe you're living together you've been long-term daters or you're in a deeply committed relationship. You still felt a significant loss. You felt so misunderstood as if not having a label and official label. Such a spouse didn't give you the ability to grieve the right to grieve and the support. Wasn't

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