A highlight from Past and Present Prudence


She was previously a senior staff editor at the new york times where she is now. A contributing opinion writer. Welcome to the show. Thank you so much for having me. I am so glad to have you here. is so excited to regain the joy of reading dear prudence. Now that i no longer rate dear prudence and i have been enjoying Your turn at the helm immensely. Although we'll say finally hit the point of Like whether it's adhd or pandemic inflected forgetfulness. I can't quite be sure. But occasionally there will now pop up like rita classic dear prudence and it will be from my tenure. I will think right. I've never seen this letter in my life. I have this brand new to me. Like i read it with fresh eyes and i'm i have no memory of either reading or answering it. I can totally imagine that just because bear so many letters and some crazy situations and a lot of them kind of just end up leading into each other and like feeling familiar. It's a delay. Like i genuinely as you know as a fellow advice column enthusiast. I read just about every dear prudence session that was available. Like through the archives You don't years ago. When i was working a different day job and so a loved it immensely and i missed it and i'm really glad that now. Apparently my mind is leading me. Forget all of my own answer. So i can read them as if for the first time like i told you i think i. As soon as i got the job. I stopped reading your columns and i wouldn't listen to your podcast just because i was a big fan of yours and i was afraid that unintentionally. Just try to imitate you and be you and now that i've been going for a couple of months. I felt safe. So i went. And like listen to all their archives. I'm good now. i i think. I shared that fears. Well like i was really afraid of doing that. And i wonder now looking back. I'm like i think. I know how to stay myself like as you said. I bet you can remember year you and i may. Has it. been roughly what you kind of anticipated had there been sort of new joys of writing the column that you didn't get from reading the column so i don't know if it's the honeymoon phase. It has been more fun than i thought it would be. I'm just really really enjoying it. I feel like i mean it's work but when i'm doing it i'm in the mindset of like texting my friends like that's just how natural it feels because i'm just a person with a lot of opinions who honestly is pretty judgmental but i'm not i know how to behave in the world. I don't go around giving my opinions time. Not ask now. I've been asked and it just feels great. I was just thinking that it was like you also know how to behave. You never offer unsolicited advice and was delightful as it's like oh i've been asked to put my own and thank you. I will totally so yeah. I've been really really enjoying it. And i think one unexpected thing is that the questions are really good. I thought when. I got access to the box. It would just be full of lake. This is more of a comment then. A question and hate mail and just kind of incoherent descriptions of situations. It didn't make sense but it's like eighty percent like well written clear descriptions of people's dilemmas that are appropriate for advice. Call him so. That's been pleasant and kind of remarkable because you know as you as you kind of acknowledge the beginning like anyone can write an email to that account like. There's there's no filter there's no like you don't have to pass a certification like test to make sure that you're nice and thoughtful The fact that many many people like the majority are coming to you with like. I've thought a lot really carefully about my life and my problems and i would like your advices kind of lovely. Yeah people really seem to sincerely want to do the right thing There is one person who every week fills in every field of the forum. Like question tagline email address with make. Your answers shorter there long. And so i'll be reading. I'll be sincere questions and then see that like every you know eighty questions it's fine which But yeah that's the kind of thing that's sort of. Its low level enough trolling that. It doesn't necessarily like wounds you or stick with you in the same way other things but there's also the sort of like did you do automate that you have a little calendar reminder every week ray that like surely that takes up a lot of your time rate and also saw advances one sentence. I'm like give me some credit. They're not all long and boring well today. at least i hope that we are able to occasionally go long. That's been one of the joys for me about switching to a format that's only part advice once a week which is say i can really spread around and make like snow. Angels in my answers.

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