Listen: Prince Wilhelm, Kaiser Wilhelm, Queen Victoria discussed on Behind the Bastards
"What a nice product or service so is just described? It was nice now. Let's get back to talking about. Prince Wilhelm's misshapen arm so solo. Thin right yeah. His damaged arm was a matter of serious concern for the German. Royal Family Or Prussian at this point royal family. His his nurse rubbed massage oil on it. Daily to try and stimulate growth Wilhelm's doctors ordered that his rb tied to the site of his leg for an hour a day in order to try to force it to to grow normally. Oh my God. He is a back brace for his arm. We're getting to the back brace. Oh yeah now. The infant prince had almost no feeling feeling in the limb and barely noticed most of this While most of his treatments were ineffective but benign. Some were really brutal. And I'M GONNA quote now from the book. Kaiser Ville home the second concise as life by John Role when the infant was six months. Old Professor Bernhard von Long in back of the charity hospital in Berlin prescribed animal baths twice a week. Wilhelm's was left arm was inserted into the body of freshly slaughtered hair for half an hour at the wild animals. Warmth and vigor would be transferred to the arm. No I stuck him arm deep dead animal. No why did he was a baby. How is how would this grow up to be a good I this is like biblical curses? They're staying upon a baby. Shove fresh bloody corpse on the literal infant child's arm for an hour late Azazel someone in the room like we gotta make sure this is remembered because of what works. What if it works the best king ever I mean all and it's never gone wrong? Amazing that's brutal. He's he's the prince of Prussia so this is like the best doctor you can get at the time in the country. Germany at this point is renowned as having some of the best doctors on the world. That's like have medical science. What is that everyone else? I honestly I would rather die at twenty four then didn't have that be my medical regimen. I yeah died years ago. It's terrible now perhaps. The most damaging treatment came at the direct orders of Queen Victoria. And I'm going to quote now from John Vander Tender Kiss biography coin. Victoria's a piece of shit by the way just as it heads up I did the I I went to. I went to England Over the Summer Brag and we did the Buckingham Palace tour Because I just I just wanted to see what it was like and the ooh the revisionism on. There's there's no mention of wilhelm there's no mention of you know it's just too messy. They're like she was really nice. She hated when her husband died. Thanks thanks for the forty dollars a brea. Well here's a little bit. More about Queen Victoria headed the princess. Were talking about Kaiser. Wilhelm's MOM doted would it on babies and within a few days of his birth. She had started breastfeeding him to the revulsion of her mother-in-law Knowing Queen. Victoria's views on the subject. Where at one with hers she? The mother-in-law wrote the Queen asking for her approval and putting it into this odious habit much. The young mothers disappointment her baby was promptly handed over to a wet nurse whose milk irritated his bowels and cause regular regular stomach upsets so the queen of Prussia in Queen Victoria both hate breastfeeding. Because they think it's gross commoner thing to do and so they make somebody who's milk makes Kaiser Wilhelm Sick breastfeed the baby. You know what my mom did the same thing except with formula so you know. My mom is like You stay away from me. Here's absolutely. Here's some nasty chemicals. Good luck with your life now years later his grandmother. The Empress Augusta is other. Grandmother would light to Kaiser Wilhelm and tell him that his mother had refused to breastfeed him because she found his arm disgusting. Oh but he was nice. Oh that's Nice Nice. She's just a bitch who hates his mom and his blink. He said how does this kid not grow up fucked up women on. They don't like woman on woman conflict. It's not fair we don't need it it makes me upset. I my grandma that though to my mom yeah I it's it's less damaging when the babies that are getting like manipulated by the fucked up. People aren't growing up to be the emperor of Germany. Yeah I mean just regular fucked up. People are the best. Yeah we as it is. Yeah if anyone any power nobody turns Out Great disaster like every now and then every now. And then you get a Danny Devito but most of us don't turn obsessed with Danny the veto. What about love Danny? Billy's I don't know anything about Billy Zane. Is He nice. He's Nice. Good good for Billy Zane everyone. Let's replace Congress with Danny Devito and bill to white man. We can support at this point now in eighteen sixty when the prince was was one year old. His doctors began giving him daily. Electromagnetic therapy applying constant galvanic current to his neck for hours every day to attempt to stimulate blood flow in his arm arm. Electrocuting the infant Kaiser for hours a day did not work either. No kidding God. It's just like your child has has a disability. We're four pages in and we haven't stopped talking about the fucked up ways. They damage this kid trying to heal his arm. We also I got. It is hard not to feel for you. Like that's a lot to deal with your family's electrocuting you because they find you to be gross that yeah a nightmare. That's a cross to bear certainly on January second eighteen sixty one. King Friedrich Friedrich Ville helmed the fourth died and principal. Helms grandfather became Kaiser Wilhelm the first he was sixty three at the time two years later in eighteen sixty three when in the prince who had become the guys that we're talking but I know this is confusing I'M GONNA call when I King Friedrich Wilhelm the fourth. He's also a Kaiser Wilhelm. I'm only going to call the Kaiser Wilhelm from World War. One that we're talking about this episode the Kaiser for the sake of like making this makes sense share win the future. Kaiser was four. His doctors presented him with a terrifying and barbaric machine designed to help him treat another one of his ailments. C. Four Years After Birth Ville home had developed tortoise caused by the healthy muscles on the right side of his neck pulling his head downwards in that direction now this would obviously be way too visible an ailment to possibly let the king of Prussia half the future king of Prussia have to treat this. His doctors prescribed him what his mother called ahead stretching machine. That sounds save sad an hour a day every day in a letter to Queen Victoria. The prince's mother described it thusly a belt around his waist to the back of which an iron bar is affixed. The bar leads up the back of to something which looks exactly like a Horse's bridle. The head is then fixed in this and position desired by means of a screw which adjusts the iron bar. Oh why this is. I'm sad Robert. This sucks now. The young prince eventually went through facial surgery to correct. This which alleviated alleviated the problem at the cost of permanent disfigurement He was also subject to an arm stretching machine which was used on him for years and was similar to the next stretching machine deserted sir torture device not helpful. Yeah the only thing that actually did help. His arm to grow somewhat was of course of regular gymnastics ASHTEC's which worked go fig actually you just actual exercise yes that bell there. It's so I'm like I. I mean these these. These doctors have to have at least the foresight to give the arm stretching machine confusing name. So you don't notice. It's an arm stretching machine and referred to as the arm stretching machine but it probably had a fun German nickname. Dr seuss sounding thing now. In spite spite of all this horror films early childhood was considered he remembered it at least as fairly pleasant his mother and father were both doting parents which was unusual impression families of that era. Uh He was the baby of the Global Royal Family and for a time. Queen Victoria's favourite grandchild starting eighteen. Sixty three he began to regularly visit his aunts and uncles and cousins and Great Britain John. Vander Kissed Describes Him as a spirited child quote on his way to Saint George's Chapel Windsor he through his aunt Beatrice as much Out The carriage window was only five years old at the time and in no position to exercise any authority over him queen. Victoria's youngest child. She wasn't always remained her her mother's baby a name. Her nephew soon picked up when she told him petulantly that he must address her. As an aunt he snapped back on baby then board during the long marriage service while most of his relations were shedding emotional tears. He pulled his dirk which is a knife from his stocking and threw it noisily across the chapel floor when his young uncles Arthur and leopold remonstrated with him. He bit them in. The lakes aches. Sweet kid I mean I gotTa love that He. He Bites King Leopold of Belgium the slaughter of the Congo in the leg for yelling. Get him for throwing a knife during a wedding. which is awesome? That actually does sound like what you would have done. Yes eight lil little little knife. Thrower really might overnight thrilling. I love throwing nights. If I any time I get really drunk. I'm GONNA throw knives I you know I I I I know that to be true. It's I think I also had a shirt that said aunt baby in middle school. Yeah there's a Lotta these phrases or bring or bring back some some memories Beta. That's actually a sick burn for. That is a sick bird. He was not. Ah Not witless quick. Yeah that's quick for a four year old to not bad. Fuck you on baby I I can't I have no punch-ups Great Hell. Yeah kid now. In eighteen sixty four. The prince's father who is the crown prince fought in the pro Danish war and returned home a war hero. The future Kaiser's father would again win. Laurels in the Franco Prussian. War of eighteen seventy one which is what led to the establishment. The German empire some of the Prince's earliest strong memories the future Kaiser Strong Memories where his father sending back captured battle flags and glorious reports of conquest from the front lines so he grows up like with some of earliest memories being his dad being a legitimate war hero like he was really close to the front obviously not as much dangerous and infantrymen men but he was like participating in battles and leading troops in combat and stuff okay so as he grew into an adolescent. The young prince gradually overcame many of his physical limitations Asians. He learned how to swim and row and was quite good at it. His Grandmother Queen Victoria was ever on the watch for signs of pride from her first grandchild. She told the crown princess to bring him him up. Simply plainly and not with that terrible Prussian pride and ambition which grieved Dear Papa so much in which he always said would stand in the way of Prussia taking that lead in Germany which he ever wished sure to do. If only the Germans were more British if only the gym more were more humble like us. All we did was conquer. A quarter of the world's land surface Unlike these arrogant Germans chill and tolerant British. Yes yeah now. The prince's parents seem to listen to this advice starting in mid eighteen sixty six when the future. Kaiser was seven and starting school. George Hinz Peter was chosen to be his is tutor now hints. Peter was a calvinism which means he believed that only a predetermined St- elect few ever got into heaven and the vast majority of humanity was destined for hell no matter what what they did as you might expect. He was a gigantic Dick. He also looked exactly like the dude who played Taiwian Lancaster. On game of Thrones Sophie. Looks up his picture like exactly like like him. It's really weird now. Hints Peter's Educational Program Involves Twelve hour days of mixed study and exercise. It was in his words. Based exclusively Liane stern sense of duty and the idea of service the character was to be fortified by perpetual renunciation. The life of the prince to be molded on the lines of old PRUSSIAN simplicity. It's ideal being the harsh discipline of the spartans. Now it's here. I should say a few words about Prussia. Prussia no longer exists as a state or as the political entity in any way precious. Disillusion was one of the British requirements for the end of World War. Two prior to that pressure was the most powerful German state and the source I for all of our modern stereotypes of Germany and Germans as disciplined stern humorless and militaristic the Prussian military was one of the chief military forces in a Europe for centuries and became world famous for their discipline and skill during the US revolutionary war a Prussian nobleman baron. Von Steuben built the entire American military from from scratch. The core of our military's organization to this day is still based along Prussian lines. So it makes sense that the young prince would be raised in a strict militaristic spartan way. Okay but while Prussian disciplined made for an effective military it also made for profoundly damaged a young men which is why we WANNA do yeah hints. Peter declared that the growing wilhelm could never ever receive any kind of praise approval or encouragement for any reason. He was ordered to eat dry bread for breakfast when he and his."