Bain, Al Korea, Momma discussed on Happy Mama Movement with Amy Taylor-Kabbaz
I think if profound to share with all of you. This simple idea has revolutionized the way that i am approaching all of this and is going to be the basis of everything from my programs. My books which is what. I'm really excited to share with each night. There is a new area but a very ancient area of study. That is being reborn at the moment. That is the study of the transition from a woman to a mother and the anthropological term. This is that is given to. This transition is mature. Essence now they geic journalists classical studies at university person inside me loves this stuff but let me break down and explain what this means. It is likened to adolescence. So adolescence is the transition from child to adult. It is a very natural thing that we all go through. That does not mean that it's easy or consistent h of us we all go through our own version of adolescence. Adolescence changes every single part of year. Your brain your hormones your body you'll sense of self your place in the world how people view how you view the world what you want bay who you think you are your relationships what you like what you don't like all of it it changes all of it and depending on the support they people around you have much of spoken to and held through this transition from child to adult really depends on how smooth is fear now anthropology traditionally there was also a transition from a woman to a mother that was just the same code matrouh seasons something once again the takes years this is the thing about mama hood we don't get to the first birthday ago woo did that acta myself now it's not the way it works in fact my oldest tends eleven in november can't believe it and i still am going through this i think the school is throw even more chaos in trail worlds but this idea of matrouh since is similar to adolescents in the sense of it changes everything it changes out brain our body our hormones a sense of self a place in the world do i people view us who i we view the world what we wanna do with our lives how we feel about relationships how we feel about us so all of it and lack adolescence takes many years to find yourself and go through that transition and like adolescence we need to have the support the communication around this they just the words and the understanding so all of us can suddenly set all k- i shouldn't be expected to return to work twelve months after maternity leave and be exactly who i used to be. I shouldn't expect that my relationships and my body and my passion is the same as it used to be. It's not a transitioned through that part of my life. And i'm entering the next one. You have no idea how many times i've actually cried as i've been raiding this research Talking about it. I was at a party on the weekend. In this poor group of women got stuck with me talking about it and my husband diverted said oh i was talking about mature since again. It's this adjust. Wish we knew this. It just would make such a difference because this isn't something that we will just get ova when our kids tend to or even when nice dots go if you've got a couple of kids like may you know on still figuring this out because i'm now a mother of three and the youngest is on before so i'm still redefining who i am. And when we accept that suggests coming to this point until we acknowledge that we have completely transitioned into someone new and then we literally sit down and say okay. So what does that mean for may as a career woman but does that mean for me as a sensual and sexual woman. What does that mean for me as daughter was made for me as a sister. Without looking at all of this we flounder. We keep thinking that we are who we used to be like the square peg in round hole. We keep thinking we who used today and if we giant except on a date level that we have changed and we won't be the same and that that is actually an opportunity to completely redefine who we are to literally sit down with the big butcher's paper and pen and say a came. So who am i if i changed if i've left that behind. Who am i going to become. What type of mother partner women do i want to say. It's life changing so a promise. You that happy mama. We'll be bringing you as much as i can find about this for as long as i can do this. This is what i'm he talked to us all about. What would happen if we could say to women. This is beautiful. You transitioning completely into a new version of yourself. It's gonna take maybe seven years to figure out what this means. Maybe more if you keep having babies but this is a k. at work you're not going to be shown who you are. You're not sure on whether you want to be doing that anymore. That cy k. And if we accepted and somehow feel excited by it about who we're becoming and really honest like it's a privilege to go through this to transition into the next stage of bain woman but when we don't accept that and we don't put on those moments into glasses and we join acknowledged that right now where i am. Everything is changing and everything has to be viewed through this then we really struggled and we keep thinking. Why is he still so hard. So i think there is a beautiful opportunity here for us to principals incite. Okay all right. So of changed. And i can't be who i was but maybe i could be even better and maybe this is an opportunity but we have to do that in between all the other things that momma who asks us right. That's what makes it so had is that we're not only told that we have to get back to our normal life as quickly as possible. Our bodies have to go back to what they used to be our friendships. Our relationships are six. Live al korea. All of it needs to go back to who it used to be. Congratulations you had your baby. Now go back to who we know you today the way also then bombarded with messages about how we should be as a mother. I just think if we could change this it would be phenomenal. And then the trickle down effect to our children.