America, California, Siri discussed on Stand Up

Automatic TRANSCRIPT
You're not a bad driver this asian. I'm sorry racism in itself. This madness gets around. Using a g- it's added to get one of those. I i i tried to be achieved. Get a phone with a. Gps there was a horrible mistake for myself. One of those those iphones with siri. All you assistant. She talks to you she listens to. If you're american. She doesn't understand one. Would i say. I don't understand why i speak english. And they're talking to a huge. Like what do you need like surrey. Please call pizza. You want pizza. No no no. No no cancel cancel siri. I need pizza. You want pizza no series. I want i want pizza pizza. You want pizza. no no. I know syria. What's going on here. You want to pete. Siri siri peter. Siri siri you're not making sense or are you. Are you having an attitude you tell me. I don't know what the hell is going on. Here surrey just listen to me. I don't know what do you mean. You don't know bitch dialing mom what the hell is horrible. That's buckled down and buy myself a real. Gps get me around which has been working like a charm if you don't have gps you get your cell. Phone is the best thing you'll ever do. Just don't make the mistake. I made by from craigslist. I bought one of craigslist. And the guy who sold it to me didn't tell me that it was a spanish language. Gps which is not so good I didn't understand anything. she says. Look still gets around because the arrows on english thank god but otherwise it was just horrible and i hate to the first few days and then men. I fell in love with her. She just i. Don't i don't understand why more americans don't speak spanish. It's such a sexy language sitting there like all the men here. You want to feel like a man you get yourself a spanish. Gps no you don't understand. Traffic never sounded six years as punching random destinations and she guides mirage. So that do get seen in those those metro syria. That is and i'm just laying. Shucks tom tom. Let's say that all the time. Sexiest guides me around beautifully. I love that. I'm going to learn spanish because of that. I'm definitely spanish. Has gone up my list. I had a few languages in spanish. Spanish was like six language. I spoke four languages in south africa and then fifth language is going to be japanese and spanish but now spanish has gone up japanese. I've had to pause because of the earthquake. There's not that many of them traveling now. There's no one now. Like walk around. The streets. Just know but but spanish has gone up. Because i was getting good at japanese. Don't get me wrong. I was getting really good. Could see a great language is powerful. Because he's japanese from your chance to make you feel strong. Who do very strong whereas english english you speak from the from the head and chest do not. I mean speak head and chest. You wouldn't know this. You wouldn't know this if you listen to many coastal girls in america. I've been in places like california. We're woman insistent speaking english from their nose which is not the correct. Yeah like you guys have the only garrett tiffany and we were talking and then there. That's that's not the right way. You're not using your lungs. I know this. Because when i choked her she sounded exactly the same because dan she like. You're totally choking me right now. And i can't breathe and this is so not on. I'm going to tweet about this. This is like the worst thing ever. I sell dying. I'm jay horrible with japanese. A strong japanese speak from the chest. You know a lot of americans are learning chinese. I've seen chinese. I see people's you gotta learn chinese taking over chinese ni. How giannis is it's too late. it's too late to learn chinese. It's over no it's true it's true because it's also one of the hottest which is in the world. I mean how do you. How do you learn chinese now. Just over ten thousand characters and the alpha bitch ten thousand characters at twenty six in english and there's still people going what comes after q twenty six ten thousand. They've got that's super smart or they must have the worst sesame street in the world. Suck being a muppet in that country. Agnes see them on a monday morning. Singing to the kids. Seapower thousand. She's she some fountain alexey. Five years later share our shoe just horrible. Horrible japanese is easier three thousand characters and a stronger language. I mean everything in japanese is strong even the greeting you up power. Thank you domo aristotle power yes that's a great language. Say other things as well like could you about air which means goodluck dolphin reusable in everyday language it works. I guess it works. I could also see other things like new new are newark got ta which means look. The chickens are running around. You laugh. But i've used successfully on many occasions by many occasions. I mean once. I was in an airport standing at the baggage. Carousel and the this japanese guy came in. He stood next to me. We standing there. And i'm look at him and i've been waiting for years to speak japanese super excited. I was like this.