A highlight from Encore - Emily Fletcher - Time to Reset and Examine What Matters Most

Untangle
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Back on. Untangle feels like home feels like old home town. You're one of the original co hosts and original teachers on our app and we just have such a strong history. So i love that so much of two funny stories about the app before we dive in okay. One is a doorman in my building was like emily. I've been listening to you on my app on my meditation app. And i don't have an app for ziva and i was like what are you talking about. And he's sticky. I have this happen and you came up. And i was like what he showed me the app and it was meditation studio and i was so thrilled. It's now we have this special connection and then the other admission that i have to make i was shooting kids course last week after being quarantined alone home for five months with just me and my husband was oh and a set and a camera an improv. So as a little amps. And so i listened to my own pep talk from the app and i love it anytime at a big talk. I listened to it. And i don't know if it's great or narcissistic but it is what it is. It doesn't matter if it works. It works. I love those pep talks and in fact those fueled a new format for us. Because we now have unease which meditation studio and muser combined now uses the brain sending had been we have a collection of talks that are called news mindset. and they're all inspirational and motivational talks. And i think they were inspired by the original. Emily fletcher pep talk. So there you go right on. I'm so anxious to hear how you're doing personally with all of this. You're in new york city. How old is your son now. he's too he's too your quarantining with your son and your husband downtown new york city. Tell me what has it been like for you for the last couple of months. We are in brooklyn so we did live in a tiny little apartment downtown for many years nine ten years and we are just every day. Thinking are lucky stars that we decided to move before the quarantine because it was tight we only had one door and we both work from home and then with the toddler napping like we would have gotten divorced or killed each other or moved happy. Still been that tight place so thankfully we moved. We both have more space now. And so that's been a big blessing and also my son because he's too he wasn't in school and he doesn't really have friends like he doesn't care about socializing with other people very much he just wants to be with us. You just want be with him and so so many ways the cards have been dealt in our favor. I have so much to be grateful for. We have an anti her name is visa. She lives alone. She drives so she's been able to work through this whole thing. I know a lot of people didn't feel comfortable if they did have child care. But if they're childcare lived with the whole family or people in their family were working the native comfortable having them in and so they were dealing without childcare but we've been able to have childcare. He wasn't in school so anyway. Point of the story is that as intense as this is. I feel like every day. I'm just going through counting my many many blessings and recognizing my privilege now that said what has been challenging for me. Personally is i'd say eighty percent of my friends have left new york city. That's been devastating. Because i'm very extroverted. My friends are huge. Part of my life and i feel like especially in new york city. I don't know if this feels like this everywhere. But in such an urban place in such a densely populated town that thrives on the subway and broadway and museums and intense concentrations of people. It's really fundamentally. Change the fabric of the city. And i think any time something changes outside of your control of something dies prematurely. It's hard anytime something dies. It's painful there's gonna be a mourning process but especially when it happens when it feels like it was quote unquote outside of your control off. Feels like it happens prematurely. Feel like that's extra devastating when someone dies at ninety. It's sad when someone dies at five. It's heartbreaking it's gut wrenching. And so i feel like that's what i'm morning right now with the loss of my friend group the loss of new york city as we knew it were likely closing our soho studio so it just feels like a bit of a break up. That wasn't of your choosing and death simultaneously on top of that. There's certainly amount of fighter flight happening because there is a virus going around and even the happiest people even the people who are choosing the positives still there is some percentage of your consciousness that is spent on protection. I don't wanna get this is i. Don't want to spread this virus. It's been challenging in a lot of ways and also. I'm counting my blessings. At the same time i hear you. It is the way it is and there are some positive things about it but for sure. It is really difficult and what i feel happen. Twist that in the beginning people were very motivated to create funny videos and to do the best they can. They're resist early momentum around we are gonna beat this and that the longer it goes on what i'm starting to see him. People and as the numbers don't really change that much with the virus. I'm starting to see a lot of fatigue. Agitation people are on edge and people are feeling somewhat stock. it's just this heaviness that people are dealing with. What are you seeing. what are your clients seeing. And how are you helping them. We actually held a vigil. Was the original a few weeks ago. I think you to reach out about this and just for a few weeks have been thinking about this. It's neither good nor bad. It just is what it is but this reality that people are dying in hospital rooms alone without her family is people are not able to go and be with people who are passing and so yes of kobe. But just if they were to passive any reason likely your family or friends couldn't travel to be. They're likely not going to be a big public funeral and so i'm just thinking about. Why do we have funerals. Why do we grieve together. Why do we mourn in public the real healing value of that. And i think that like you said in the beginning. We were all in a bit of denial but also assuming this is like two weeks three weeks. Oh okay maybe six weeks allow amman ministers been own our looking at years and i think it's just been a slow burn. It's burning up our adaptation energy which we can talk about in the second. But i think that there is real value in mourning in grieving out loud in naming degrees in saying it and giving yourself time and space and community to purge these feelings because if we don't acknowledge that we try to pretend like everything is fine than that trauma goes unhealed and we just subvert it and then i think it comes out and other ways like psychosis or extreme stress or blame or political anxiety

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