Softball, Ford, Soccer discussed on Parenting Great Kids with Dr. Meg Meeker
For most of the lousy decisions you'll make apparent I guarantee you we have a lot of families where you've got both mom and dad working sometimes both are working fulltime. Is it possible for them? And I know it's a really really touchy subject, but is it possible? A when they're spending just evenings and weekends with their kids to have close relationships. And if so how because if you're talking about the family being the inoculation against, you know, peer pressure and other things how do you do that? You know, if you're single mom, or if you're a married mom, and you know, everybody's working outside the house. What advice do you have for those parents number one? I would limit activities for kids. I wrote a book called as your kid. Nada gerbil didn't sell it's like spending away. Nobody wants to tell. Everybody wants your kitchen activities. It gets back to what you said earlier about the competitiveness of of parents today. And it's crazy what we do in the name of loving, our kids marshland kids who are good soccer players are good softball, players encompassing. The entire weekend was Ford's is crazy. It makes no sense whatsoever. But again, you go on good Morning America. And give six minutes of that. They look out like look at you. Like, you got a screw those because everybody knows activities are good for children. I think activities are destructive for job or I think one activity per kid is plenty in. So parents you have the purse-strings in the family for those of you who are both working. You have to be very judicious about how you spend your time and family time is tough. It's tough to cut out for the single parent. I have such empathy for those people. I don't know how they do it. I really don't tougher them. Tough. But it gets back to the degree of the relationship the authenticity in the honesty and the relationship you have with each of those kids doesn't both parents working help. No it hinders. But given the state of our society today at something you have to deal with the deal with his best to him. And I I hold heartily agree with you on. I think that one of the things that's woefully underestimated in importance is the time with our kids, and that whenever we sign them up for something where sacrificing our time with them, and you know, the sad truth that well, not I don't know if it's sad truth, but ninety nine percent of the kids graduate from high school and either they get jobs, they go onto college. And they do none of this stuff. They don't figure skate, and they don't play soccer, and they don't do. So they give it up, but what they have given up. But parents have turned over. Is tremendous amount of time with their kids and their kids lose out. And I think it's parents we need we need to understand that you talk about in your book that there are times when parents should step in and help our kids, and there are times that we hope back and not help our kids. How do you help distinguish those? To judge from call. Make it really is because Kidul work. Yeah. I can quote myself. We've seen the enemy. They are small and they're unionized. And they have a game plan. They can work you. They can punch your buttons up in part of it is just knowing who you are as apparent when to step in and help do we want to help our kids when they're hurting. Yeah. But sometimes you help them best by just listening to them and walk them through the steps choosing your words carefully. And that's why I think I think people this is a book that people will read in go back, and they'll pull it off the shelf say I gotta get that straight. Again. What do I do again because it's tough. It's a tough judgment call in every kid's different in every situation is different..