Full Body Chills


Put me on the world today. That's what they call it year. The Ward of the hospital that they send all the ailing who aren't about to get any better. I suppose anyone on award just calls it the ward though. We. Ain't. Special. I've been insane algorithms for a few months now. In and out of different rings, seeing different doctors, taking different pills and shots been shipped up and down elevators to different departments as if I was Christmas shopping at Bloomingdale's instead of dying. Doesn't matter what's wrong with me. Just matters that they can't fix it and I've got nowhere else to go. So they sent me to the ward. I heard a lot of stories about the ward being bounced around so much. saw them into lady down there cupboard and Burns from head to toe. Apparently, she was stuck in a house fire. I haven't ever seen her come out. And I'm at the same place sheet went. Heard the nurses they don't care for you as much as they take care of you. Like. A dog nobody wants. The food is worse. The beds are worse. The, Air Force. Breathing and all the same airs thirty other people who are dying same as you. That's another thing about the war. There's no doors or walls. It's just open air. Sure. There's curtains. But they're not worth a damn. The police is set up more like a barracks in a hospital. Aroma beds on either wall no more than four feet apart. You get to know one another well. I've been here less than a day and I know who can't clean themselves who can't wipe themselves who don't know why they're here and who even don't know who they are. I spent months of my life trying to find a way to keep living. One day here and death would be like healing. Maybe that's the point. This is a strange place to be. Beside me an old man told me I would get along great with his daughter who was coming by through clock. That was a few hours ago now and just a little bit ago. He acted like he just met me. Instead the same damn thing again. Closing. My eyes trying to block out where I was in being the people who didn't know I overheard a woman asking a question to one of the nurses. She May as well have been Allegra Street of Galilee. I peeped an eye open and the look of disgust. The nurse's faces was almost enough to kill me right there. How someone in a position of carrying could hold such animosity towards someone they don't know is beyond me. Is She coming I heard the woman ask who? The tone his voice made my skin shrink like I was back in school and the teacher didn't like what I just said. You know who? The woman sounded like she was pleading for something. The man's eyes rolled so hard they could a bold strike. The woman she said. I'm sure who had be think is coming is on their way. That was the coolest thing I've ever heard. Other play -cation and as generic as all hell. What is this place? Once, the nurse was gone. Raise my voice what I could raise it to at least. Who are you expecting hon? Silence fell across the room like a blanket. Every, I was on me the few who didn't have the wits. then. Every I turned away. I got no answer. I got no reprimand beyond the looks of concentrated consternation. I closed my eyes again. Just wishing I wasn't here. The woman I asked looked at me wide eyed. The mile employer. My is matched her own. Displaced seem befitting something. So highbrow. Doesn't sound so bad. That's not. I heard defeat work its way to her voice and then I heard nothing. At an hear another voice, the rest of the night. Immensely. Began to does. The lights dimmed in the hall and through the ward the very air became hushed. My ears have never once heard such silence. There was always some sound but not then. Footsteps broke in, my claps of thunder. A shadow appeared Mataya for stretched out and fuzzy becoming clear as the footsteps. Grew. Louder. A figure, a sleek black dress came from around the corner and carrying a strange case. The light stone, but her face was so pale, you could still see. It was clean smooth like a bar of soap. Her hair dark like the dress both hanging down to her knees. She walked between the bed rose. Her emotions were a natural and fluid but so elegant. Around the room, all eyes were on her. But you could tell they wanted to look away. She moved herself. So she was directly in the middle of the room. Then she turns slightly. Deliberately. To My side of the room. Every shoulder across the room from me sunk looking almost relieved like soldiers being told, they can go home. Whatever weight that side of the room dropped? My side picked up. Tension built to fear. She came and pulled out a polished violin. Finest looking instrument I ever saw. And Abo-. Her face fixed to a point on the wall unblinking anchored. She lifted bow to string and immediately my ears heard the most beautiful

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