How Not to Say Stupid Stuff When You're Stressed


Guys. It's Friday so we're dropping bonus in this week we've got to. We've got a good one as many of you have experienced. Perhaps I'll just be myself. I've definitely experienced this. Sometimes you get stressed you say dump stuff And that has it's happening to me. Still even after having meditated for over a decade but in in Buddhism. There's a way to deal with this. They call it right speech or mindful speech and the Great Susan. Hiver a meditation teacher based in the Boston area has thought a lot about this. She's written a lot about this and she recently joined me for an episode of T. P. H. Live where we discussed this subject and took questions from the audience? Tv H live for the uninitiated. Is this show. We do on on weekdays three eastern Pacific where we do alive guided meditation for a few minutes and then we take questions from the audience. The session that you're about to hear was with me and and with Susan and we talk about rights beach and being mindful of your speech and she also guides the meditation in the beginning. By the way. You're going to hear my son. Alexander playing in the background Since was recorded Live we don't have a lot of control but what's going on in my apartment at the time and Yeah so if you're okay with that listen on here we go Susan Piper. Hey everybody welcome T. ph live live from my living room if you hear background noise that is my son. Alexander playing with toys in the background tried to talk him into going into his room but didn't work so the role with like good meditators Speaking of good meditators we've got A great teacher today. Susan Piper beaming in from some of Massachusetts. I think they pronounce it. You know if you're speaking the king's English you'll be Somerville locally at some level and Susan. Thanks for joining. Us really appreciate it. I'M SO GLAD TO BE HERE. Appreciate you having our. It's our pleasure You you were a hit last time so it really great to have you back again and I wanted to talk about the subject. Which is I mean incredibly Germain and relevant these days of speech you know how we communicate with other people that Buddhist McCall it right speech Why why in particular is on your mind? These days do something wrong. I I don't know how can avoid doing something wrong in this environment. It's this topic. Came to mind because it's crazy out there. Y'All are people saying all sorts of things. They're people getting in arguments because we're isolated from each other. All we have a speech you know. That's our sole means of communication. It's all happening in the ether. It's so easy to project onto and everybody's uncertain humanity tends not to wear uncertainty well and we WANNA make up explanations for why. This is happening why that's happening and and were isolated. So uncertainty plus isolation leads to some crazy stuff. I online and at home. So how does a muting myself while you're answering? Because it's getting Routing the backdrop here so how. How can meditation help us with our speech? Well that's a very good question and so I just the definition of right speech which is a classical definition mean. Nobody has to be a Buddhist obviously to practice any of this but the whole Buddhist Path. of liberation is called the eightfold path. Right view right intention right speech number three so it's way up there and write speeches no lying. No abusive speech know divisive speech and no idol speech or no gossip. So we're everybody's telling you know it's really hard to find anyone who's not lying even if you think you're not lying people are just spouting things they actually haven't verified. That counts ally. There's I mean I don't have to explain that there's abusive speech and there's divisive speech and then there's Got Gossiping so it's hard not to do those things because we're human beings we get scared and we get angry and what what is needed before we open. Our PILES IS SPACE. Just some little space and then we can have some agency over what comes out and meditation is the practice of creating that space over and over again with every breath get absorbed in your thoughts as you know. And then you see that and you let go to letting go is quite delightful because immediately. There's a space and in meditation. You come back to the breath but in life you could come back to the good intentions of your kind heart or you know the needs of the person in front of you or the truth of your feelings about without that space. There's just reflexive nonsense. Speaking for myself I was just GonNa say speaking for myself. I'm still doing a reflexive nonsense. hopefully a little bit less So so we've invoke meditation when we do a little bit and then we'll at and let me tell people who are watching live. I know a lot of you. Don't watch live but those are watching. Live if you could send questions on this issue in particular. That'd be great Send any questions you want. We'll probably GONNA give us in preference to relevant questions but even if they're irrelevant. Send away so Susan Myself and you WanNa take over left to thank you so I thank you for being willing to sit and rest your minds so meditation practice very simple. Take a comfortable seat which basically means sit up straight. Unless you don't feel well then lie down and relax meaning while you're sitting up straight. Soften soften the front body the belly the area around the heart the shoulders times of stress. It can feel like the shoulders are like all the time but you can just let them let everything roll off your back. The mouth is closed and the reason the mouth is closed and meditation is. Because you don't have to say anything and that is a delightful luxury so let all the muscles of speech relax throat the jaw the tongue and let the inclination to speak relax to and enjoy not having to prove anything justify question and notice that inside there actually is no one talking anyway so it is quiet and you can rest in that quiet

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