Linda Ronstadt, Chase, Rwanda discussed on Design Matters with Debbie Millman
That was a a crucible moment and when I write about in Journal. It's definitely through the the words of a much younger woman than I am today just raw. Of the sense of the vulnerability of being a child that the world would rather not see an in fact. Or the world might WanNa just hurt or. Or make disappear. And and for me, it was connected to the financial system that I was already of. That also did a lot of good in world and didn't WANNA see children like him nor his parents You decided to leave chase in addition to having a different sense of where your life could go i. believe that one of the criteria influencing your decision was a conversation with your boss wherein he told you that though you were the most productive young banker on the team. You laughed too. Loudly you dressed like Linda Ronstadt were too friendly everyone and he was worried that executives might mistake you for one of the secretaries. There are no words. Now I understand this was the eighties, but still what's wrong with Linda Ronstadt? I know and actually I thought I was cool dresser. I didn't wear the suits that were so. Much the uniform I did wear big skirts and sometimes it everybody not at Chase Oh there was truly the uniform of the blue or gray suit with a little bow tie that women would wear I just couldn't get myself to do it. Now me, of course, this man was rather frumpy dressed in a brown polyester suit as he was and I'm looking at him thinking if I stay I'm going to be like you. and. Might not think I fully understood the misogynistic and class front that was coming at me at the time. It was all such a swirl of confusion. Interestingly. I didn't go to hurt interesting I went to thinking if I stay I'll be like you and it will change who I am. and Are you saying that I shouldn't laugh. Are you saying I shouldn't be friendly? Are you saying? I shouldn't. Dress, with a sense of joy. because. I can't change all that, and then what was interesting is just a couple of weeks later. I get this call from the number two guy at the bank man named Tony Tracy. I know who pulled together a small group of as an of course that day if ever I look like Linda Ronstadt, it was that day and he's rifling through these resumes which one of you is Jacqueline. No regrets and I'm thinking. You know I raised my hand and the bartender all you did before chase was a bartender. And that was a moment where I realized many of the other kids. Had these fancy resumes and lots of internships and things that people of privileged did and I didn't. And I thought he was making fun of me when in fact, he saw a himself in me and that was the beginning of a different conversation where he said I'm going to put you on the fast track. We need women like you but I had already made the decision to leave, and so that was another important confidence builder before I left. Were you scared leaving we you worried that you were giving up your shot or we really sure that this was the necessary path to take. What I knew in my deepest part, myself was that I was twenty five years olds and that if I didn't go man particularly given that I had just been offered this quote unquote once in a lifetime. Opportunity. I would never. And that was. In a way, it made the choice easier. Of course, I listened to Joni Mitchell's blue album the entire time I was on the flight and cried. I don't think I was scared of what I would find but it definitely. frighten me to experience such a loss and I didn't know how that loss would here. One of the things that I learned while reading your first memoir, the blue sweater, bridging the gap between rich and poor in an interconnected world was how though you loved being banker? You've felt that banks were missing an opportunity in not extending their services to more low income people and that was part of your decision and moving to Rwanda why Rwanda. I did not choose Rwanda Life can look neat looking backward actually wanted to go to Brazil, but I was given an opportunity in the Cote d'Ivoire. Not On my game plan and I realized that that moment that I was either going to explore how to extend banking services to low income people or I was going to go to Brazil couldn't.