A new story from The Ross Bolen Podcast


Of wow are we viking podcast now we are viking podcast now this guy's name is swain fork beard what name i am seriously i chose this dude almost entirely because of his name even if he hadn't done any psycho shit i probably just would have made some up and lied about history just to be able to do swin for beard as our psycho viking you haven't heard of because it's such a legit viking name swain forked beard he was known as swain beard because he had a long cleft beard meaning it like split you know you seen it you know what i'm sure so little bit about swain our boy forked beard on christmas day of the year ten thirteen danish ruler swain forked beard was declared king of all england and the town of gainsborough was made its capital he would be england's shortest ever reigning king but he played a big part in the early history of the nation how he got there swain fort beard revolted against his own father whose name was herald bluetooth you cannot make this herald bluetooth in the mid nineties his father was the king of denmark and swain seized the throne from his own father drove his own father harald bluetooth into exile and he died shortly afterward pretty cold blooded by our voice i'd say so swain yeah taken out your own pops brutal according to some accounts swain was a rebellious pagan who persecuted christians he betrayed his own father expelled german bishops from skinny and zealand others though say swain was tolerant of paganism while favouring christianity and many of argued it was politically motivated in his attempts to conquer the mostly christian england and gained favor with the english church he was married twice first to a woman named gun hilda which is i feel like the most stereotypical female viking name you could possibly come up with gun hilda i and then another woman named sigrid the haughty she was haughty his second wife sigrid anyway swain after seizing control from his father he starts feuding with olaf the first after olafs ascension to the norwegian throne in nine ninety five what's wayne is doing his allying with swedish king olav scutt kannung in the norwegian eric the earl of laddy these three allies defeat olaf the first in the battle of folder around the year one thousand wow and swain ends up becoming the virtual leader of norway although he you know nominally he shared sovereignty with his allies then he turned his focus to england in for twenty freaking years this dude swain waged war on england is was a brutal brutal time period for both sides women were burned alive children were impaled on lance's men died suspended from their private ports bo vikings were psychos yeah you don't want that in the year one thousand thirteen swain finally led a successful campaign into england after several failures and was accepted as king throughout the entire country of england forcing ethel read the second the guy who was king of england into exile but here's the unfortunate import after this lifelong quest to conquer england are boy swain dies of pop lexi a pop lexi less than a year into his rain a pop lexi is a unconsciousness or incapacity resulting from a cerebral hemorrhage or stroke so we just conked out wasn't even murdered he was or you know whatever he wasn't even run through the sword is my point he was he had a stroke or ab cerebral hemorrhage he died but he did get you know he got england before before he passed swain's elder son herald the second i find it very interesting that he still named his boy herald the second after his father herald bluetooth who he revolted against very strange anyway that guy herald the second succeeded him as king of denmark and his younger son commit was proclaimed king of england by the people of danna law however the english nobility sent for ethel read who returned from his exile in normandy and manage to drive kanoute out of england altogether kanoute soon returned and became king of england again in one thousand sixteen following the deaths of ethel read in his son edmund ironside these people at the best fucking names back then and he ended up succeeding his brother is king of denmark in one thousand nineteen individually also ruled norway parts of sweden pomerania and schleswig so kanoute the offspring of swain ended up having a pretty influential rain himself all over the different places in europe that was your psycho viking you haven't heard of swain fork bearded guy i was totally unfamiliar with.

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