Polio, James Roosevelt Sarah, Delo Franklin discussed on Citation Needed

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Automatic TRANSCRIPT

For those listening in at Home Eli crawled on the stage because we've never had polio joke before and we're going for all the horrible shit before careers brought to everything I for everything take that Bill Gates his mum I love some of you were so positive that you actually cut it you're like oh no I'm not non-approved Polian hello and welcome citation needed live from the Peoples Improv theater in New York the news right display what Tom might have told you when he sold you the ticket this is not Hamilton we sold a lot of tickets on Wikipedia and pretend we're experts because this is the Internet and that's how it works now I'm no allusions I'll be presiding over this episode but I have to fill out my cabinet of course I I've got a man who says he's qualified to be secretary of Veterans Affairs because he fucked married soldier once hand a man who says he's qualified to be the secretary of the interior because his mom wouldn't let him play outside he and he but to be fair I was married to that soldier well right now you were you we did have sex once thank you it's true once in the marriage that's right I've had sex with a woman crossed eve I've been can you tell you you gotTa stop asking them if you want or not when you're done I I did win though one no when you have sex twice different scoreboard also joining us tonight a man who says he's I to be secretary of state because he lives in one of those and a man I tapped to be secretary of agriculture based on all the shit growing in his facial hair Tom and say-so it isn't as secretary the one that you pat on the way to get you coffee how would you live in secretary that doesn't even make doesn't oh I'm going to share it apple at all I'm GONNA tear it up we'll tell all adorable my beard is like a small farm and even has a goatee those at home we have shifted signs so yeah yes if you want see the Shit Hits signs you have to come to the live shows one of them as a picture of poop and tits on all right now before we get started I want to thank all the fine folks here at the Peoples Improv theater who worked so hard tonight to make our audience drunk you guys I want to thank you for showing up to see us live like you people a lot better than the ones listening at home except the Patriots we also like to patrons a lot we liked patrons who are here more of the patrons who ah more already so tell us what person place thing concept phenomenon orbit will talking about today today no we're GONNA be talking about FDR and Eli Eli one is FDR stand for it is a that's actually in the F. So far so good chur now you don't scream shit out fred drill yeah nope no tell them you looked at the Douglas rose in verse cast like US Doing Frederick Douglas Lane can love getting credibility he's do now yeah no no he's he's doing good work now all right so tom you looked at the pictures on this article are you ready to tell us about FDR I am no I don't get up he wouldn't have it's fine oh there's GonNa be a lot of those yeah because he's okay all right so for the sake of those on stays that literally did not know what those letters stood for when we record skit tom who is FDR Ri well Franklin Delano Roosevelt is best known as the four term President of the United aides who led America through the horror of the Second World War and made a couple of very find deals I'll personally I think is a man who's Several mansions were only marginally nicer than my own when I think we celebrate a place like New York we're not talking about the garbage strike of nine hundred eleven or the garbage strike of nineteen sixty eight or the garbage strike of one thousand nine hundred eighty one or the garbage strike six or what from the present smell the city I can only assume must be the presence and ongoing garbage strike yeah hat I think it behooves us to squint through our watering eyes and look at some of New York's most iconic figure this man uh-huh and why C. and why seeing the what sorry too loud too loud way too loud too loud and incredibly close ends taller what figure rises up above the fray outcome what figures steps more boldly forward as a visionary leader whose triumphs and complements will go down in history as having non only saved America itself from existential peril but whose lessons have since been fully and profoundly ignored more within Franklin Delano Roosevelt Abe Lincoln Barack Obama all right gratitude Berg. He's I feel like he wants you to say him bring it on I love this song Kinda weakens the NYC James Roosevelt Sarah and Delo Franklin was fucking rich like let's just go ahead and get that one out of the way early like he was spectacularly crazily you wild rich his family came from money just generations of it on both his mother's side and his father's side the Roosevelt's were wealthy merchants and land owners the domino's were rich merchants and ship builders and Franklin grew up the kind of kid who played polo you know like the kind of kid who know Oh low guys hello later jump ahead he was the kind of quality like learn things like to raw and row and shoot pool alone on us you know like you know when you're driving past the nice high school and it's about three thirty and all those rich kids clogged the streets and their BMW's that their parents bought them Franklin was richer than those obnoxious fuckers his sixteenth birthday present was a sailboat oh Jesus who after the are then he throws they're spoiled kid Tantrum Malm wanted to steamboat it makes hard I contact with mom just like throws a Molotov walked onto the boat you mom fuck you hope you get polio all right so in case rubbing on you so case any of you guys are still labor delusion they say polio at is not how you get polio you guys that you can polio that one zero percent chance case you still laboring under the delusion that everyone is equal and Gosh we all have the same opportunities I want you guys to raise your hands if this sounds familiar if this sounds like your life so FDR was primarily schooled by a host of private tutors except when he was nine and he spent a year in public school in Germany was no problem since he was converted French and German from his frequent trips abroad when he was fourteen he went off to boarding school before he of course went to Harvard where received as in history for entering Columbia law where he didn't bother finishing because instead he just passed the bar three years later in one thousand nine hundred seven.

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