Fraud, Lexus, Soccer discussed on Design Matters with Debbie Millman


So it's it's a worrying but it's also a grandiosity humility in thank you control the world or that. I'm responsible for all the bad things in the world. It's not like if something good happens like there's a rainbow and i'm like. Oh yeah it's what we take credit for none of death but we take responsibility for all of the night. I'm a why. I'm able to see the way that i see. It now is because i have been in certain situations that i was one of the best players or on one the best teams in the world and things went wrong and it was my and your business in there debbie. I was also struck by the notion in both of your books that you both have struggled with feeling like a fraud. Which is something that i also struggled with. Nearly every day in fact abby you have an entire chapter dedicated to the feeling in forward and it's hard to imagine the holder of the world record for international goals for both men and women. Soccer players could ever feel like a fraud. I mean that is tangible evidence. That's the nice thing about sports in math. Is tangible evidence. To goals is more than one goal. So there's like a clear winner here so so what do you both feel. Is the foundation of that fraud. Nece so that fraud ity word. I've made up. But like i think that the higher you are able to climb a mountain the less stable your footing is and i think that all people who achieved really high levels of success in anyway. We're not talking about just monetarily. I'm talking about Doing what they're wanting to doing the highest level. I think that feels so daunting. I think all people who find themselves in that position have to look in the mirror and one for how you this right. That doesn't mean that there is equal amount of knowing that you deserve to be there an understanding. I also think that women have a harder time believing that they deserve any kind of reward for their hard work because we've been kind of given a lie. Our whole lives that everything that we get is handed to us. Not so yeah. Those runs well and also to be people who aren't leading her out there leading and who have so many struggles right. I mean to be people who abby as a person who was being called captain america and they'll also struggling mightily with alcoholism. But you know. I am a clinically depressed motivational speaker. It's not it's a tricky tricky right. When i talk about. This concept imposters in jim fraud. Whenever you wanna call it. It is so much more relevant in deep in my friends who are women than my friends. Who are who are not women. And i and i do believe that's because we have always been a part of a culture where men can lead in can fail and men can lead and can have problems in men in that is never an issue but we all we live in a place where women are expected to be perfect whatever that means and so any woman who is in any particular place of power leadership who is also human feels scared about that and it and it's not a wrong feeling because women no inherently that the second bay make a human mistake the secondary their humanity comes to the forefront. They will be crucified for it now. Made up like that's what we do to women. We allow them to rise a little bit in the me. Take them down so whenever people talk about this as something we should just get over. I always think. I think it's something that we should study and know how to deal with. But i think it's legit back in two thousand seventeen. I curated an exhibit called. Text me how. We'd live in language at the museum of design atlanta. The collection was focused on the intersection of visual imagery and language. And how language is the connecting factor among the human race. It was built upon my belief that we live. In and through words we use words to express and define our reality somehow by having these concrete messages in one specific place where we can all view them at the same time. Maybe we'll get to enjoy that. Feeling of being fundamentally connected. Today's sponsor lexus has a similar philosophy. What of their core practices is.

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