Facebook, Florida, Stanford discussed on Habits and Hustle
Helping yourself do what you already wanted to help yourself feel successful in any product or program should do the same thing if you want it to work in the long term suffer temporary things? There are lots of ways to get ourselves to do things temprorarily but for lasting change. Those things really matter. So what did you learn you find out in all your Nollie or research? Impractical like Florida things at. I'm like I'm paid or look like they would work. Didn't work at all but impractical experience. Where did these people took to the most the easiest ways you would think that making a big public commitment announcing on facebook from now on? I'm going to work out an hour a day or I'm going to lose fifteen pounds in the next ninety days and you hold me to it. Everybody and if I don't do it you would think that would work. It doesn't work very very well out all works to set you up to be really nervous anxious and to maybe humiliate you in front of your friends. So it's not finding a way to put yourself on the hot seat in front of others works temporarily but it doesn't work effectively for lasting change. So that's one thing that were often you often see in your often shown you think. Oh if I just you know in this moment I'm so upset. One of my students did this when he posted. I was like oh no. He had a drinking problem. This is after he left Stanford but we are friends on facebook and he announced. Hey everybody now commit to all of you. I'll never drink again to back. I really really really hope that's true but this is not a method that reliably works just taking proclamation on facebook now. What might have done is bring him support and empathy and guidance and help from others so that might be good but just the pronounce just putting yourself in a difficult situation. Socially to change your behavior in the long term I just don't see evidence that works reliably. What happened to the Guy I don't know actually I mean I didn't follow up and say you're doing that I hope he's okay We're now you know. Maybe I'll I think since that. I'm pretty sure it didn't work but It's it's things like that that people are led to believe Or they even to think. Okay if I just read. All the academic studies on Behavior Change. I'll be able to change my behavior. No if I understand neuroscience by read up on what's going on chemically in the brain then I'll be able to change habits. No Return. Neuroscientist would be the fittest must prosperous. Must grounded people. They're not so it's the other thing is that adds up to information alone does not change behavior reliably so it's not about an lack of information or even a lack of having enough motivation. It's about having a easy to do. Approach that you can do even on your worst days even on the days that you are stressed out you can still do the habit. You can still make progress. You can still feel successful and a way of designing those habits. And that's that's tiny habits is all about is cares it system. Here's how you designed for any habit that you want and it's yes you have to design the habit there's some pieces theresa okay. Let's make it really tiny. Let's find work fits in my day. Let me wired by celebration And that's not hard to do but people don't WanNa say there's a learning curve. There's a very gentle learning slope. A like what's the difference between doing ten pushups into? There's a huge difference. What's the difference between flopping all your teeth in one? It's a huge difference. It's just like when e commerce was really knew there were a different places you could buy stuff Amazon. Did one click. Then they won because of one click because they made it easy. There was a big difference. Between five clicks in one click and simplicity. There is a third maximum that I don't share in the book. There's only three and its simplicity. Changes Savior so just understanding that the easier. You make the new habit for yourself. The more likely you're going to succeed on so yeah I'm talking about simplicity. But isn't that simplicity and ease the same thing really? I mean mature. Sure sure to some extent. Yeah now you I break it down. Say there are five links in the ability chain. How much time does it take how much money they can and so on so? I break it down so I take things like motivation. I break it down and I take ability and I break it down and take prompt and break it. So these three really important components that comprise any behavior then to go further within that. Like what are the types of motivation? What are the factors in ability? And what are the different ways? You can prompt yourself so I love systems case. It was super natural for me to map out the system of behavior and then the subsets and then the process and create flowcharts. That are back out of the book that I can't argue in the book because really fine well because some people get intimidated. I guess by flow charts. So yeah I I. I do a little bit like I have to tell you when I was reading I was like to go through those charts a little bit like I was. GonNa like early pretty quickly to get to the information because I'm bad with it but like you know the thing that day willpower and discipline her. Also things right like people who are like really successful like a lot of people who may be listening to this or not it both are okay you know. I have a lot of discipline so I'm knock limited. I'm I'M GONNA work out at four and I'm going to knock check my email. They are very very structured and now throwing in this new door for them. Their whole structures obviously a lot. It's very throat off And they'll say off I have I'll use myself like okay. I'm going to be. I have a lot of discipline so discipline. I'm not gonNA eat that chocolate cake that my kids are eating because it's costly around my house. Now and it's it's it's like it's discipline. Willpower don't work long term. Brian and I've said that for a while that you know. It's not about focusing on discipline. I mean yes. You can exert willpower and you can use discipline in moments and their times. We really need to do that but to use it day in and day out to get yourself to workout or in a certain way or resist certain foods. It's a very unusual person that can do that and so great. It's nice bills. Are those kind of people in the world but for the rest of us which is the vast majority. Let's not fool ourselves and think we can rely on discipline or willpower to make lasting change because we're just deluding ourselves. And I'm not even by the way I don't need to only talk about like weight loss or working out. It's just like an easy thing to talk about just enough but also about being productive about it now Having get it being productive activities me give an example from an hour ago in my own life so here I am my life. Hasn't been that appended. Because I do so much from home. And so on. But still the distraction of the news and everything so I just found myself not really settling into work and it was like okay and I was wandering around the hustle but I was like this is weird for me so what I did. I did a tiny habit. I set a timer for seven minutes and the habit is to set the timer and then it was like okay during these seven minutes. I'm just going to prioritize what I need to do today. And so then I prioritize seven minutes and it became really clear to me what I was doing and what I was not doing and then I just over the next project so the habit that I've learned is one that works really well for lots of people because I've shared a lot of people probably figured this out on their own is by setting a timer for when you find yourself procrastinating or spinning your wheels or whatever you can trick yourself in to being productive and getting started by just setting a timer can be three minutes seven minutes twelve minutes whatever and you set it in the tell yourself well by still just want to wander on the House after seven minutes I will but guess what once you start getting some momentum. It's so much easier just to keep going so that happened to me today and I think is because there's so much going on in the news and then within tiny habits we've launched this global training series. That is just taking off big time and thinking a lot about that and and so boom but I was able to fall back on this habit. Get myself back to work and back to being productive cow. It wasn't a matter of discipline or will it was just. Maybe it was a matter of discipline for like three seconds to set the timer. It's like okay. Set the timer Donna. Do It yes. And so it wasn't long term. It was just in one single moment. Take the next step and get on my way and so that that worked well. In that seven minutes you wrote it to do lists. You will have a way of prioritizing so I just dove back into my already kind of done it this morning but I realized I didn't do it very effectively. So how do you retire him? I use stickers on card so I yes I have a whole this is oh my gosh prioritizes ask. People are better but for me. The way it works for me is anything that I want to do for sure. I write it down on one of these little stickers yellow is just for a normal task and then I have cards that are devoted to specific projects so one is to my Stanford lab and wants to this global training series and I have a boot camp coming up and put each sticker on the card. And then if it's yet you still have confidential information on it. I think at Catholic anyway. The yellow ones are tasks. The pink ones are things. I must do today so for example. If you WANNA get into this is funny. I have a really good friend here in Maui. She's ninety one and I just feel like I should call eight and so that's not productivity but it's important to me and so that's pink that means I got today it's going to be bad and then my stanford colleague from School of Medicine. We got six warning planning research to help older adults with chronic virus. Her name's Dante so I needed to fall Nancy for sure on her email today because she summarized research meeting so I did that so once it's done. I said the sticker aside and so the the blue stickers are things that can do really really quickly like my colleague Cana. I needed to ask her about something. So blue means these are just. GimMe Caesar's So it's a way of a ranging stickers and having projects on cards and then just sore it and then the color coding as well so if there's a time of my day where I feel like a little momentum a psych let me just do the Blue Ones I'm GonNa do all the balloons Bam Bam and feels good. I mean right you know people listening you succeed on a bunch of small things you get him off your plate Bam Bam and I try to be the hardest thing I mean. Prioritization is really hard But I worked really hard on my systems for it and I found that a digital solution just won't work like a physical wasn't these stickers. Try to be realistic. Like I don't have ten pink stickers. I have three maybe a day and then I try to make the key for me as make progress on the most important projects. It's not just gets done. It's Although I do like that system to the I like it is. It's no what is important and then make progress on those things in that means. There's a whole bunch of things you're not going to do and that hurts. Labor hurts a lot sometimes. But that's just what you gotta do. In order to have impact in the world and to move things forward is you've got to say notice stuff or just set it aside or say maybe some day I'll get to this like here's a colleague from Stamford. I won't name the name. But that's somebody that's a nice to do child. He's a neurobiology. Stanford as I go one of my labs at. Oh you should reach him. I'm like sure but it wasn't urgent And maybe I'll get to it someday. But at least with the stickers and writing things down yeah now I don't have to have any anxiety around this being undone. I know it's not going to get lost..