How Queer Eye Star Karamo Brown Deals With Thirsty DMs



Welcome to just SIP. I am Justin Sylvester and today we have one of the FINEST BLACK MEN ON TV. Joining us for this podcast. This conversation was it was jeep. I found out a lot about myself. I found out a lot about the queer eye. Cast I mean there were some nuggets in this interview and I'm just so happy to have one of the most enlightenment join me today. On this podcast. Please welcome Kerama Brown. Thank you for coming. I'm so glad to be here. We are at just a SIP with the one Kerama Brown. Everybody thank you. I'm calling this episode sex drugs and Maury Povich book. If you guys have not gotten this book right now get it and do yourself a favor. Do not. Just get the book the Audio Book because you can hear it in his own words. I am audio book person. I listen to them all the time. Never have I heard so much heart so much love so much pain behind one person telling a story. I appreciate that Boo at all. So all we can you texting me saying. Oh my gosh that part this part and that made me so happy you have no idea because I put a lot of people when they write memoirs they say they're going to be open transparent about everything but then they don't and I was open and transparent about every single thing for sure I was like I'm not hiding anything I don't want you were giving me. Yama for two hours on the treadmill because we're so open and transparent. Who was the one person you were scared to read this manuscript because you? Kinda just laid out there. Yeah nobody to be honest with you because before I started read everyone knows that I live my life. One hundred percent on one hundred percent open. Because that's the only way I feel like other people can grow if I'm an example of the growth and so I let everyone know completely before I was writing this book. I'm writing it and I would like to include your you being a part of my life in this and if you're okay with it let me know right now. If you're not then I'm going to have to figure out a way to still sell your story switching. Yeah and every single person was like we already figured you'd be honest about it so I wasn't worried about anyone to be honest about it and good and there was one subject in there that you decided that you needed to pull back on so I didn't talk about my mother being abused in detail because my father used to hit her because she still healing and so as I was writing. I was noticing that it was bringing up a lot of emotion that she hadn't healed from yet so I was like you know what I'm not trying to trigger my mother. I love my mother's roll back and help her with the you know the tool so that she could support herself and then when my suicide attempt I figured I don't need to go into detail about that because if someone else's reading it I don't them to say Oh this is how I can do it. Yeah I wanted to instead. Stop at a certain point. And then say if you're having these feelings or if you know some of these feelings here our resources you can use. Yeah because a lot of times people don't do that. Yeah and I'm like if you pick up this book here's a way you can get the hell yeah. Was there something that happened while you were writing where you thought you were over something and you had worked through something but then writing this book you almost had to reactivate it and re re confronted you talk about a lot of things in the book about your name and being gay all these things? Sometimes we don't take on you know we don't take it on fully. Yes we kind of brush over it. Yes they we're fine but we're not anything in this book where you were writing so yes but not really because I do the work myself. I mean like career wise. That's I think I'm so good on. Queer is because having a background in psychotherapy social work. I can do the digging and digging on myself. The one thing I would say that kind of triggered me a little bit was when I got to the color. Ism Chapter in 'cause I talked about how my skin tone my grandmother used to say to me. Don't talk it up a family anymore. Which you know. She comes from a certain time. Where you to be lighter meant that you could have attained more success and so when I was writing that it brought up these feelings again because through Social Media. I get these comments because I'm engaged to a white man. Yeah that somehow me being engaged to a white man has somehow diminished my experience as a black man in this world and it bothers me like people say. Oh You Dana White Guy so you all of a sudden have lost part of your blackness and I'm like when I walk out the world people don't see me with a White Man. They see a black man and when the police stopped me they don't say oh you're dating a white guy we'll let you we'll let you go. You're good yeah. Don't have Kiki somewhere and a drink. No they say you still black band. And that's what gets on my nerves and so when I was writing that I realized that there are still issues with my color that it's a different former Colorado but there's parts of it that still bother me because it didn't erase yeah raise yes completely you know. It's funny because when I first came out. I think people had a problem being gate but now that I've come out and in the past dated a white guy when I go home with a guy they now look at me because I'm an interracial relationship you're from Houston Texas. That probably still happens to you. Oh my gosh are you kidding me everywhere? I go like the minute we pop up. This was really gets me people. Somehow he put me on like back up back you up. My man is successful but my had no hand in giving me the career the success the money in my bank account and it bothers me when we go out and people assume my career is somehow because of something. He's that yeah I'm like have lost. Meanwhile he's like a doctor somewhere else talked about this. You know what I'm saying. DoN'T COME FROM MR. Calhoun exactly well. Let's remind people where you started? Yes because rule. Philadelphia was everything. Yeah you were the first black openly gay man on television. What was that experience reality? Reality mother ru father who was the first. Let's let's be very real but in reality television and when that title came out I didn't even know that also people's right in there and I was like what are you talking. About Ruben around forever and then I was like oh reality television got it and what was it like It's it's it's sad and it's also exciting because I was on the real world in two thousand and four two thousand five. Why in the hell has there never been an openly? Gay Black Man cast before me. Yeah that's a problem for sure because we have been around. Let me take some I go to Atlanta. I go to Chicago New York. Texas Tennessee and black gay men are around thriving doing the most amazing setting culture setting trends yet. I was the first so it kind of disappointed me because I was like there should have been twenty before me before me but then on the same rate I was like well. I'm glad that I could kick open the door so that now there could be more people and then I'm going to continue. Kick Open that door and also gonNA continue that every other brother. That is Gay I'm going to say come up with me. Let's let's do together. I let me applaud. You let me celebrate you. Let's let's do this. We don't do that very often was many. Don't but many do you do I do. And I think it's important that we encourage those who on their journey to loving themselves and to love others to know that we support them in that they'll get there. Yeah no in. Two Thousand and four people weren't living that loud. We were still kind of in the closet. You Know Oprah said. We was in the closet. Let me tell you I was out in the club. Run IN THE STREET. Oh do it in. Oversized Shala John Jeans and Timberlands and then each outfit sounds happy. I need you ought to put together like a collage when you go on TV and you live your life like that and then the reality stops and you're back in your real reality. Yes what was the? What was I guess? What was the backlash because you know with my family? It's like you can be gay. You can be you. We support you but the minute you put it out there. It's a little bit harder. Yes that and that's exactly it. I had family members who immediately were turned off from speaking to me my father and I we already had a rocky relationship because he couldn't reconcile our relationship with his religion and so because he he believed his God was teaching him that somehow I was not perfectly designed and not made in his eyes. He figured I can't talk to you but then on top of that me putting it on television embarrassed him and so he didn't WanNa talk to me. We got into physical altercations. It was bad and there was other family members. Come from Jamaica in house so it's like the Black Culture Jamaican Culture Cuban culture which unfortunately there are members subscribed to this sort of ideal of what it is to be a man. Yeah and then me being proud and well-spoken on national television somehow didn't define me as a man because of the fact that I had intimate relationships with other men and your only son and I'm the only son and so you know it was. It was hard but then on the flip side which I tried to do was focus on all the people who love me like I will just showered with so much love beginning letters and letters and letters from people saying Oh my Gosh I love you. You're amazing mice messages. Dmz ENDS. It was good. It was good but I'm not GONNA lie it. I took a dark path quickly because I felt like I lost myself because trying to battle the family and the good of here trying to be something more at Age. Twenty three was a lot. Yeah and so it got it got rough real quick she black Jamaican and Cuban. Sx is good. You better you show up with a PPO per somebody. Did it. Better be an ambulance late nights. I just can't even imagine it would add. Top passed already clear the room you were living your best life. Look my favorite line. In this whole book I found. It is when you said molly you in danger girl. Okay when your I'm not having an explainer people I'm GonNa let you explain it to them because it was one of the most profound things that I've read. What was that moment like for you when I found my drug of choice. Yes Oh my gosh. Tell me you history. Yes so I mean my father being rastafarian Jamaican Us We'd he recreationally and so it was always in my house shot. Okay I loved it. I loved trying. We'd because it made me feel social when I got it first time from him so it was a weird experience of like not having to go to a corner to get we'd just being able to say. Let Me Walk. My Dad's room and get weed and but then I realized I didn't like the feeling of it. I didn't like being lethargic. I didn't like it was down. It was a downer. I didn't like it so then I started trying to know you weren't going in your dad's closet to get some weed. He had a basketball side. Oh yeah he well he did okay he did he did. He had won by his bed but he also had like a basketball in the freezer. This yeah like big of weed in the freezer and so I'll just opened up the bag and I'd be like with my friends be like oh how much we need today and I would just take it out the bag and so it was easy for me to access it but I didn't like the Downer feeling of it and then I stopped that because I never had addictive personality towards that but though I had an addictive personality So then I started molly and ecstasy and that was cute for like the first couple of times I was like yes. I like someone rub up on me and I was like yes. We are living. Ooh And then as I would have to take three pills to have that same feeling. I was a you're sweaty. You're growth cute and then I got introduced to cocaine and that's what I said you in danger girl. And how old were you when you got introduced twenty five? And who was the bitch because at this point? Let's remind people if you read this book. He is now on the. You're in the press tour. You're in the Club appearances. Best Life as Kerama. Oh for real world yes and you start out on this dirty your sixty three you in between one hundred ninety three and two hundred and ten pounds and you get introduced to cocaine yes. What's at first feeling like

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