Podcast, Danny Shapiro, Stephen Cope discussed on Family Secrets

Family Secrets


I've been thinking about coming here and doing this. Special live episode of family. Secrets with vessel is my guest and I was thinking about. I love full circle moments and this feels like one to me about three winters ago I reached out to vessel. We have a mutual friend. The Yoga and Yoga philosopher Stephen Cope and I was in a complicated state. I had recently made the discovery about huge families secret of my own after casually doing DNA test recreationally doing DNA tests way. I think of it and discovered in Pretty Short Order. That my beloved dad raised me had not been my biological father which was something that had never entered my mind and so I was in this state of really almost a kind of relationship to my own self my my identity. My Body my face in the Mirror. That felt traumatizing and shocking. And I was walking around. Really fueling the physical symptoms of that the dizziness the lightheadedness the floating and so I reached out to Bethel and he very kindly agreed to meet me and we spent an afternoon talking by a fire on a winter day. And I couldn't have imagined as it's been true in my life so many times that it would just three short years later and I would have synthesized this metabolize this experience into a book inheritance and then I would simultaneously create this podcast which was a happy accident. Just really briefly. I wrote this book about my family's secret about my being family secret and then all of a sudden people started telling me there's and the very first time that that happened. It was a friend of mine. The Buddhist Mindfulness Teachers Sylvia Burstein attened. She had just read the manuscript of inheritance and it prompted her to tell me a story of a family secret of hers and I was on the other end of the phone and I thought I wish I was recording this. And that is the entire way that this podcast was born but one of the things that I've noticed in now to going on three seasons of the PODCAST says thirty. This new season is launching next week. It will be thirty guests that I've spoken to which is not. It's not really a scientific sample. But I've noticed a few things and one of the things that I've noticed. Is that every guest of mine at some point or another no matter what their story is does use the word trauma and I guess. I wanted to begin by. There's a there's a line from the body keeps the score. Which I reread and re underlined and felt new things about I think the body keeps score is a book that you can probably come back to multiple times in your life and read it differently and have different different moments in it and different concepts in it that are underscored but I figured that you wrote the book probably in around two thousand thirteen and you wrote that. We're undo years over ten years. Yeah you didn't write it in twenty thirteen but but as you're writing this at this point you wrote. Were on the verge of becoming a trauma conscious society so I guess I wanted to ask you what you meant by that. Then and how does that sit with you now? Seven years later. Well I think that's a very tough question because live in this sharply divided world and at the same time that I know hundreds of people around the country who are doing amazing work. I know people who have these yoga programs in the Baltimore. Inner City schools and know people who have shakespeare programs in Kansas City. Kansas prisons and just mazing Singing the soldiers Working with horses with peabody is enormous layers of cautious and be getting it. And then our mainstream society becomes more and more rooted in is destructive capitalist world of how can we make more money and destroyed a little bit. Faster could make more money. We should just stop including medicine itself of course Psychiatry very much of living. Visit crazy diagnostic system giving people labels as make any says have no signs of validity and at the same time this other group of people go get paid by insurance. You know who don't part system beady discovering a lot and they see a difference becomes a larger and larger way And I don't get see them so it becomes a little right now so the comes larger and larger and yet at the same time there's more and more of an identification of an experience a piece of history apparent aspect of childhood as as being identified as trauma willing more and more. It seems I mean your book. Has its came out three years ago four years ago. And there's a reason why your book is occupied the top three spots of the New York Times Paperback Nonfiction Bestseller List for an entire year. People in airports are thinking. I know what I'm going to read. I'm not going to be Danielle Steele. GonNa Really Danny Shapiro. No Shapiro also. Because it's the next book you read books so what? What do you think that that that hunger is about does get? It's a tricky question. I see it I see. I'm so impressed at a live in a particular world people. Ask me all the time what's happening in the world. I don't know I just don't do people who I know and other people come to see me to people who I hang out his two people want to share that work for me and I always lightened face. Also very mindful people descended people. Why don't see he your stories. That don't know how large this and so I don't know but they noted that many places almost every place I go to. I mean people who do amazing things in terms of getting into your body telling the truth speaking openly try to lead authentic life interesting the also in Silicon Valley which is stubhub in some ways. Where there's all the money and all these immature people doing amazing things in craziest things and yet people are also really searching for hobby. Keep ourselves together or do we pay attention to each other and so very serious effort to understand how we can make it safe and energy places for each other my mind just went the quote unquote wellness movement as something that kind of adjacent to this. In a way where I think we meaning we who think about these things are thinking about the body more and more as the place. That is the locus of where it all gets expressed. I mean there's moment in your book probably several you talk about gut instincts right or am I remember. When I was reading this in King I have never in my life had gut instinct and followed it and been and regretted it and I have had gut since and ignored them and that leads to walls and trouble. I think the idea that we're listening listening to our bodies more. Yes we are. You know in certain circles at the same time..

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