TIM, Chess, King Pyrrhus discussed on Leadership and Loyalty


And he has been featured on every possible media you can think of. Tim is a returning champion in that he's been on the show. I think he might. He might hold the joint record of this is his third appearance. Not usual. But you know, every time he comes back, what he brings is enormous amounts of value. And you know, in this new book of his, which we were talking about when we've been talking a lot about in part one, this book here, a new kind of diversity. We've been talking in the first part of the show, by the way, if you didn't catch the first bar, going back and listening, I promise you there's a lot of value in there. You know, we talked about this generational idea we've all been taught about diversity, the diversity, gender diversity, ethnic, what's the word? And the diversity and ethnicity, sorry, little cranial flatulence there. So we've got all these different kinds of diversity, but you know, we were talking about how the every one of those ethnic groups or any one of those gender groups is kind of like it becomes a click. And we have to break through those. We got to build bridges, not walls. And we were talking a lot about how to do that. And we're talking about how if we don't do that, we lose out and in part one, Tim gave us a great example about a young man who worked for a paint company, a very famous paint company who took on his own idea, created a million plus followers on TikTok and then got fired instead of being applauded. Yeah, and promoted the company obviously lost out in maybe don't even realize or didn't even realize it. So we talked about all those kinds of things. Now we want to sort of bring it back because I want to talk about, how do we bridge that gap? How do we have those conversations because I mean, let's, let's be clear, leadership has changed at a skills level social skills level and morphed vastly over the last 40 years. Leading a team today is vastly different than it was before. And we had talked about in the first half that you've got to be able to have conversations with people who are diverse from you, whether that is cognitively diverse or any other kind of diverse. So let's talk about how do we start some of those conversations. I know you've got this idea of metaphors or images that create conversations, help us out. Yeah. One of the chapters in this book, a new kind of diversity. I talk about 6 conversations that I believe will work because they have worked. So these images that dove just mentioned are habitudes. We call them habitudes, images that form leadership habits and attitudes. We really do believe pictures are worth a thousand words. So you launch with an image, you don't have to use a PowerPoint screen, but one of the images is one that I've talked about. I think I mentioned it even before on this show job. It's called chess and checkers. And it's basically built off of this premise. When I play the game of checkers, I pretty much treat all my pieces alike. They're the same color, they're the same shape, the same size. They move alike. I treat them all like. When I play the game of chess, I have to know what each piece can do. A bishop is different than a knife and a rook than a pond, and that a king and a queen only in no strength to each piece can I win? I think mediocre leaders play checkers with her people. Treat them all alike, and they get average performance. Great leaders do the work. Chess is more work than checkers to find the knights and the rooks and the bishops. And they connect with others at the uniqueness of their strength and their personality. And those people flourish under the leadership. So the conversation is, you know, are we playing chess or checkers here? And if we are, what are your superpowers? What makes you at night? What makes you a queen, et cetera? So I'm being cheesy here for the sake of time. But it makes sense. Yeah, it does for us. It's helped us immensely. Another big one is pyrrhic victory. Now here's victory pyrrhic victory. It's named after king pyrrhus, an ancient Greek king from centuries ago. The term pyrrhic victory is actually in the dictionary. We just turned it into a habitude. So here's the story behind pyrrhic victory. King at the ancient Greeks were fighting the ancient Romans, and it was 40,000 Greeks versus 40,000 Romans. Just pounding it out. Pyrrhus, king pierce eventually brings an elephant, they bash through the wall, and they finally win the battle of asculum. However, when the king is overseeing the he surveying the results of the battle, dead bodies broken swords and shields and so forth. One of his captains comes up and says, congratulations, king Paris on your victory. His response was one more such victory, and I shall be lost. Now, we all know what he was saying there. I may have won a battle, but I think I just lost more than I gained. Doesn't this happen intergenerational conversations? A listeners, if you got a teenage son or daughter, have we not won pyrrhic victories. We won the argument. We lost the child. We just, we just lost them at the heart level. This can happen with young and old teammates at work. So we need to make sure we're not winning pyrrhic victories. We need to ask ourselves questions like, what do I hope to win by winning this argument? And I think the ego question, dove, is why? Do I want to win so bad? Why would I put so much stock in this silly issue that is not, I'll tell you a good example that I think people would appreciate. I have a dear friend that said, Tim, I read your pyrrhic victory. He said, I just want to puritan victory on the phone. One of our customers called us and said the shipment had not arrived on time. And I argued that we sent it on time, and we went back and forth on who, you know, on time, not on time. He said, I was so vehement on winning the argument that we sent it out on time, and I had the number, the tracking number. Finally, the costs were said, all right, thanks, bye. She hung up the phone. He felt good about winning the argument. He just lost a, it was not short of a $1 million customer. Because his ego got in the way, and he was more intent on. He should have said, we saw it on time, but that's not the issue. We need to get something to you. You know what I'm saying? So number two, let me do at least one other. What do you do? I just want everybody to just pause for a minute.

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