Mark Kelly, Gatos Kelly, Ashley discussed on Mac and Gaydos


News with Machen Gatos Kelly wore the chairman of the Arizona Republican Party said will stop gun grabber democratic Senate candidate mark Kelly dead in his tracks well mark Kelly's opponent senator Martha make Sally disavow Kelly ward's comments will ask her today. Thomas was in North Carolina hi Tom welcome but I Ramsey show. Hey Dave I do better than I deserve what's up. only because they can you say that actually. okay for sure to call. yeah. your entry into the point so I have a question my parents just recently retired and they are sixty eight sixty six years old. they have a nesting about one point five to one point seven million dollars and the issue is I'm I'm from a large family and a number five out of six my parents were basically I mean they're not rabbits but they're Catholic so there's a lot of us and three of the older siblings are kinda using them to bankroll their lifestyle so I was talking to my mom the other day. and basically she said they spent about it she could have been been exaggerating a little bit about three hundred and fifty thousand dollars in three years just financing you know whether it be you know down payments our house is private school for kids additions houses this morning stern there as well but they're just kind of rapidly losing money and I spoke with my parents about this I told them that I was concerned. they don't really not care but it yet since I don't care if they just want to see the kids happy so I got nowhere with them and then I tried to talk with my siblings about it and they were just saying how there's some attention that they care it's their money I have no business talking about the money that I'm I'm selfish basically you know I'd say I don't care about inheritance I just wanna make sure my parents are taking care of as they get older so I tried talking to the insane insane asylum in basically in on ostracized from the family just because you know I'm looking out from my parents what steps do you think that I could take to make sure that my parents have a stable financial future basically I think you've taken all of them and I don't think you can do anything. our parents are not incompetent are there just dependent codependent is not that unusual actually and so on and you know your older brothers sisters are parasites and so then that's not illegal either it's just a it's just distasteful say the least I don't think you're going to fix this I'm sorry I wish I could give you more hope than that and the only the only hope I would have is a couple of things and I'll give you a couple ideas but given the steps you've already taken in the resistance you've already met I think you've lost her footing to have a discussion with any of these people. I don't want to hear anything else from you much. yeah that that I would I would agree with that and I mean help one the siblings you know they they said they weren't aware to the extent of the situation that was and but the other one now I don't know so I mean if you could ever circle back around others two options one is a wonderful book called boundaries by Dr Henry cloud and if your wife is already making me angry that you know and if you ever have the chance to leave that with your mom and dad it would be healthy for them because they're not very good at boundaries and here is what it comes down to here's what the discussion might sound like after you let a cooling off period occur because right now things are pretty hot yeah but next time you know I don't know Christmas for next spring or something you circle back around your mom and dad just the two just the three of you not your wife in the room and certainly not your brothers and sisters okay and just say listen yeah can do whatever you want I don't care what your day. I was lucky I was worried about you and here's the thing I should let my brothers and sisters and you're not helping them. enablers are the kindest most generous people out there and they give money away to keep from facing difficult decisions in conflict. and you think you're helping them but you're not helping them because what happens when they can and if your money anymore they're not going to live like they live because they've never had the dignity of solving their own problems and so you're actually causing your children to be weak. and you're harming them with these expensive gifts and so while you think you're helping the actual irony is mom and dad you're actually bring great harm to them and I really wish you'd quit harming my brothers and sisters. okay and see if they hear that they probably want okay so in leaving with a copy of boundaries that's one option a better option even in that might be if there's someone that has influence with your parents that you could talk to that would be willing to sit down and talk to them about this for instance if they really look up to their priest you said they're Catholic if yeah if they're priest as a man of wisdom and would sit down with them and guide them in the US it and. truthfully if there are mass attending Catholics they probably probably would have great influence with them yes and and he might look at them and be able to say the exact same thing as you said but they might hear it from him where they didn't hear it from you because I powder Jr but. yes sure yeah and so but again he he may not be a man of wisdom he may not be a man of conviction and willing to enter into a conflict situation he might rather just stand back on the side and smile. and I don't know I don't know the priest some of our very tough and very wise in summer wimpy show RG like creatures right and so you know that at it but someone like that that would be in a position of influence with them that they could hear because they're harming themselves and their kids. and it's not devastating it's just aggravating for everyone involved and then if I were you are if you did those couple of different things I would just shut up. and just move off to the side and just love a mall where they are they just is where the is there is crazy in every family my brother every family if any of you think they're not crazy in your family out there it's because it's you Ashley is with us in Texas hi Ashley how are you. I'm good how are you better than I deserve what's up. so on the job I work for currently was recently her chest and my position in at the end of this year and the car I own. down about between five and seven thousand dollars yeah I need about three to five thousand dollars worth of work done to it I want to know should I get the work done on the cars and to kind of soda what was wrong with it. possibly need engine mounts and attempt the time temperature changes messed up I think possibly here what's this car worth. all fable from CarMax for twenty thousand dollars you don't spend three thousand dollars on a four thousand dollar car. okay you saw the car as it is and you go by another car. okay that's that's about four thousand dollars but that is a good car that hasn't got a best of timing chain or broken in motor mount. and there's lots of four thousand dollar cars in good shape good enough shape like that that'll work that way so what do you what do you do for a living. well my work in accounts payable making what kind of money. nineteen dollars an hour has your job hunt going. all other kinda sorry. HM. I'm sorry your honor. but. thank you select I did a really good interview but when I go into the interview like I get really nervous and hopefully better and people mention like in Hungary faster you know the amount I know it took best I'm working on it. another thing I can afford it should be an insurance doesn't cover that in like I'm also a contractor at my job so like I don't get a package one job in behind the saying need to get a job now. later okay here's the thing here's what's interesting you just talk to me. in front of seventeen million people and you weren't talking fast. I don't know why you are nervous talking from seventeen million people that's heartbreaking. Hey I think you can do this I think you can do this and I think you need to go get another job as soon as you can hold on I'm gonna give us some I can calm and stuff including the proximity principal book because that's what you need and then you can get this car straightened out once you get your job landed in because you're pretty scared right now hold on can help you out this is the Dave Ramsey show. let's say you're driving home today and I don't know where you get T. boned and you end up in the hospital in a coma.

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