Jason Romano, Wounds, WBZ discussed on David Chadwick
News talk eleven ten ninety nine three WBZ welcome back to. This show and some of. You may recognize that tune from mercy me and. Martin lard one of the singers former see me. Is one of the ones who endorse Jason romano's book live to forgive Jason is my guest today, there's that voice Just so thankful Jason you're. With me today talking about your pilgrimage of forgiveness about your dad in his alcoholism you're talking about the steps. You went through to help. Free your heart From your bitterness toward him and let's talk, about the third step recovered the first two real quickly then go to number three yeah so, the first two steps were, feeling the pain acknowledging what's happening in. In in this situation evaluating the trauma and allowing yourself to create boundaries and recognizing what's happening in in your life not trying to suppress it but to acknowledge that. It's very valuable. And, then the third step, which we've got to talk about is transforming the. Wounds transformation is, is such a powerful word because it's really what takes place for us When we enter, into a relationship, with, Jesus Christ it's transforming our hearts transforming our lives bible talks about you know being. Conformed not being competitive is being transformed by the renewing of our minds so with the wound has taken place. In the reason that we struggle with forgiving someone. We, need to transform that world it's a process for. Conversion that kind of takes place and studying that course towards healing and forgiveness and for myself the. Transforming. Began when I started walking with the Lord but, again as I told you forgiveness is a, process and even forgetting my dad it took me gosh twelve years after I became a Christian, until I was finally able, to forgive him but that's really what. It's about is transforming that wound from a place of pain to a place of purpose so that's the third step go into the fourth yeah please do go ahead The fourth, step is literally what, the books called lifted forgive it's forgiving the abuser, it's kind of, obvious, step but that's really the place where you have to kind of finally combat climactic. Moment right where everything changes and you say you know what I forgive you for me what I forgave my. Father it was finally a place where I recognize. That, me Jason Romano there Dan father still father of my daughter the husband follower of Jesus was no different than my dad in the, eyes Jesus was and how he viewed us, you're saying is as great as his my son, was his greatest season is as great it's his because I was used, to, have my dad on a level towards the bottom of of what he was going through what I looked, at my life is this guy worked, at ESPN and had a wife who is a beautiful wife, and we had a nice house with cars and I. Have my daughter and everything looks great but then I looked at through, the lens of Christ and I realized, wait, I'm wretched center and as messed up in in terms of the same that I commit as. My. Dad the one that. Tap when that happened I, have something that I'd never have for my dad before which was empathy seeing it from? His point of view and that's, when I was? Finally able to go to that fourth step which was. Forgiving the news that's powerful Jason and somebody once said that forgiveness is Is giving up your. Right for the other person to hurt, as much as they've hurt you and, I'm always liked that because when you realize that. You are as great as center as the other person is how can you hope the other person will hurt like you've heard. You realize you deserve the punishment just like they do and you give up your right to retaliate you refuse to, operate in revenge and that sounds like where, you automatically ended up completely I mean CS Lewis, has this great quote there's to be a Christian means to forgive the, inexcusable, because God has forgiven inexcusable you and that includes myself you everybody listening that's what's happened here where we, ask for Christ into our hearts and, we ask for forgiveness of our says he's forgiving inexcusable and, us so we're asking for that to become Christ like. For that new nature to enter in us and we have to exude, the way that he is for giving, us, that unto others forgive as we forgive You know and, that's what I finally was able to come to a place where the person that had to change was me not my dad I had, to forgive with, me I didn't have to have my dad it or do anything different to earn that forgiveness it was something that. I was supposed to do again it was a process but that was where we ended up Reno Jason I have two other quick insights from my years of pastoral? Ministry in my own struggles in life with having to forgive one is, that you leave revenge to God Romans twelve. Nineteen that we don't return evil. With evil but evil with good and as you give. It to, God you trust him that he's, the one who's able to take care of it and that releases it within your heart, the second thing that, I've really learned. Is that as you learn to share in the sufferings of Christ, Jesus absorbed the pain and punishment for my, sin on the cross even. Though he didn't deserve that sometimes we have, to absorb the pain of other people's behavior even, though we don't deserve it because that's what Jesus did in his love operating within us, allows us to share Oh sufferings and that helps, ultimately to set us free as well It really does and it's such a great thing and. And remembering to forgiveness must be granted before it can be, felt I write down, a lot, because we need to grant forgiveness but it's a process you know, you hear trust the process a lot sports with certain, sports teams and that's really what it is the process of forgiveness something that we, start by granting, and then we enter into a place, of really I don't know just. Understanding that, it is a process. Not something that takes place instantly it's. A it's a daily walk almost like a daily dying to yourself like Christ caused us to do a daily process of forgiving the person who sort of the book. Is live. To forgive moving forward from those, who have hurt us Jason Romano my guest today, is the. Author Jason is soon people can get the book online Yes they can get an Amazon. Where we're books are sold everywhere books are sold in king my website just Jason bravado is my name dot com great well listen we've only got a couple of. Minutes left. But we would be remiss if, I didn't ask the question how's your dad today Well thank you for asking he's actually, doing very well the. Miracle and all this that he.