Babylon, ABC, Kyle discussed on The Babylon Bee

The Babylon Bee
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Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Babylon be best of coffee table book. I saw the notes right there. Oh yeah and it's pre-order it you can pre-order now. It's not out yet yeah just understand. It's not out for a while and it says preorder that means before order. You're like the person getting in line per star wars movie like months before it comes out. Yeah a lot of camping gear. Most people are mocking you. Yeah you're camping out outside the Babylon be online wine store and it will probably probably be out in the middle of this year but we don't have a firm date so yeah early summer issues were aiming for but who knows who knows nobody. God knows. And that's all that matters all right and now story one Kyle you speak. You cannot literally wrap your head around something you would get hurt. That's a good point surly smart very smart point that she did she try that did she want did she try to. I didn't read this. She yeah she demonstrated that you can't get confusing so we had a writers meeting yesterday and we were discussing how to attack this. AFC because because yeah we'll see it had this beautiful beautiful comment section. Thank you about bringing up the poverty draft and this idea of a bootstrap this idea and this metaphor of a bootstrap started off as a joke. Because it's a physical impossibility to lift yourself golf up by a bootstrap by your shoelaces. It's physically impossible. The whole thing is a joke. Speaks for itself mic drop. I just love that. She specifically mentioned shoelaces right after. You did that article about the shooter. Yeah that was the thing. We were all laughing so hard because we did that stupid. Our coach we already explained the joke. Maybe a two podcasts. In a row we talking. Yeah but You know the joke being anyway. I don't want to say it again but explain it. The third time wrangler sell their shoelaces. 'cause the articles so stupid actually playing Super Meta joke but anyway and then she said it's just an awesome that we write the absolute most over the top thing we can think of and the chief of fills it and it's just absolutely wonderful curious. where the etymology of lifting yourself up by your bootstraps? Like where does that come. It was the actual. I had heard that before that well. The point is that you can't you can't but you know any any idiom breaks down when you think about it. Yeah well yeah. We try to list off the other day wrapping your head around. Something was the best one. So let's get our wives opinions on destiny. What are what are your thoughts on? You may speak she represents all your interests now now my interest. This is nice because now that the women are attacking US see. Yeah it safer. It's no longer problematic that we're just a bunch of white males laughing about a brave woman of color except for it feels like we're commanding them to speak to. We are well. I personally get all my news from from the Babylon be because I know that it's it's real. It's serious anything I've ever learned about. AFC has been from the Babylon so in the Babylon beat. Tells me she's dumb. I'm like she's dumb. Just go deer. She's is like CNN on my turn like here's your news. Here's here's the news. You're allowed to watch a very well informed and intelligent wife Ethan. I'm like Kim Jong Il of the House. I have one new source. I love her uh-huh to see and then also when I speak I have a voice actor speak for me. The deeper booming voice. And there's all these myths about you that have evolved over the years sing songs about blowing missiles and my enemies one time dead wrestled a bear and killed it like this. Aw is like a song about it if the marching in with their guns the the Nicole Hassle Muscle doesn't interesting. It's wild you guys coats family. I have one compliment for ABC I really liked the way she does her makeup. But that's where it ends. She's eight people that call her ugly honest. Are you serious of all the people that are on TV for politics. She's one of the more attractive people. At least she's not ugly. Yeah but you know there's more to life we there's the saying so it's such a below the belt thing they drowsy gave her like a unit brown or teeth. Sticking out all snuggling Yes so you know denier Libertarians. And so we read a lot of like well. I smoke a lot and every day just getting other every other there are some really funny conspiracy. Theories about you see in one is that she is just like a stage actress that like memorize lines and stuff and I could totally see except that she like messes them up in her. Do that stuff again guy off stage with the script you skip. It belongs to the script Desi. What are your thoughts on? ABC's makeup. I do like her makeup. I think that whoever does it as a a very good job I do make too so she's looking for. Somebody knew I could do that or her hair. I do her hair as well. She has nice air. Yes this is. The commentary that matters just trots on. ABC's makeup. I have no comment. No Okay I just want to say that. You can't judge Roger put by its cover. That's idiot wait a minute. That's all you can get your book by. That's exactly if you look in a book you have to judge it by its cover. The whole the thing is a joke it all falls apart in. You can't have your cake and eat it too ethan. Kyle confuses me so much I know frank was Tommy. You flip it around and make sense of it and subsequently have can't be like hey I want to see this cake I got eight it. That's a good point missing seeing the forest for the trees and you may even be throwing out the baby with the bathwater. There's no forest within ten miles of here so I don't know what you're timing uh-huh desert form. Yeah we're missing. The forest is literally trees. I don't know how the desert for the missing of the buildings buildings for the desert for the sand the beach for the granules ocean all right. We took that one far enough. You No. It's the weirdest thing to me about this. I know at least for us being on the podcast here is like a total around like using my life is the way more talkative one of the two of us and now it's totally around really weird. This is very problematic with the three guys. That are on the mics. And we're just keeps nudging edging his mic in my direction. I'll keep taking away from me extremely problem. We gotta get way more expensive. Maybe when we get to one of these stories that that you guys will have some strong opinions on we can just back off and just put it in the air if you want to speak just just like in the Nicole House Speaker Rolling panics if you WANNA speak. That's what the wives have to do in Nicole Hassle permission. Move onto a second store. I have no idea how to say the Disney. Can you read the story. I don't know how to pronounce is again. Carney for tests introduces the Biden collection. I was good very convincing. How you pronounce it Garni Garni? So how is Brooke Teas. So is that a good brand destiny can you. Can you give us some advice on shampoos. That are good for our hair. My wife is a stylus Well it really depends on what kind of hair you have so if you have a lot of very dry dry hair you have course here. I like Basu products and while products or pursue products surface. Basu things like that. But this this Garnier and Pantene and Suave don't use it. This episode is brought to you by desert with Zero Salon. If you're in the southern California area you want but you hair down. I wonder if there's lawns in the area where you can get your hair done and then someone behind you just smells your hair for like a shoulder rub the by the whole my old man size they smell this. Oh this is what Joe Biden has been doing at these events posed like a little girl up or like someone like put his hand on their shoulder behind him and he'll do like this and you're like what are you doing. He lifts their hair with his nose. Kind of like a dog lifts your hand to be petted. And he likes Kinda SORTA Sniffen. You've made me this little kids do. It's a weird so I don't even like shampoo. I always accidentally I use the conditioner or whatever. Is there hand soap. I'm good with that. Hence the shower. It's whatever's around and grab I shampoo.

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