BMW, Melt Bounds, Christopher Cross discussed on Experts on Expert with Dax Shepard


You okay. And now my favorite part of the show the fact check with my soul mate and Monica pad men. We don't normal setup. Let's just say that right in this quarantine life of ours. We don't ever normal set up at the attic where we can really find tune. Everyone's levels in their headphones cam. And now it's just kind of one size fits all right. You gotTa hear whatever volume. I'm hearing what's curious as we also are using headphones splitter so it is conceivable that you're getting more output than I am. Oh do you want to switch? Which is see if it sounds the same to us. Okay yeah it sounds the same. Sounds the same baider-meinhof who knows I had? I've had a lot of better. Meinhof experiences lately. Yeah I forget what they are but I've said it a lot. I noticed you three times in the last four days and I always makes me smile every single time you say I love it. It's really the only thing I've retained from. These fact checks is remind. The only fact I've remembered is the definition of baider-meinhof which is frequency illusion. If you hear something or see something then you start seeing our hearing examples you get a red BMW three series and you don't feel like you see those at all but the second you buy that car everywhere you go you notice. There's millions of them. You're not unique at all. They're everywhere. Everyone has a red three series. I don't know that I'd say that's the classic example but an example in relate to buying a car and then noticing that Asahara now everywhere. Yes before is invisible to you. That's the one I remembered was Attribution error. I love that one. That wants some me up so much. Remember that when we learned that from here what was that one that is when someone cuts you off in traffic and you attribute their behavior attribution to a characteristic of them are a character flaw right so that person's a selfish that person's impatient as opposed to making a a summation of them contemptuously. That there was some situation that caused their behavior. Either they had to swerve to miss a dog or they were rushing to get a kidney to the hospital right. You don't know which it is. Yeah I'm really prone to just say people are pieces shit and make a real big character assessment. I don't think I do that very much. Yeah you seem to be in the middle. Meet me in the middle. Well I mean yeah. Maybe I'm in the Middle Truth. Be told I'm just not thinking about that person very much so it's not like I'm even like I just get annoyed for three for one second three and one half second. Yeah and then. I don't think like well. Maybe they're going to have to talk myself out of like a duck off a waters asshole. You just let it roll right off acid analogy and I am. That's the I think the goal forget trying to figure out. Yeah they're going. Who Cares? Yes yes that. That's the dream. I just don't need to be worried about what that person's doing. I can. Just be annoyed for one second and then move on. That's the dream that's the rim what is interesting is sometimes people. Are you know? There's some extenuating circumstances caused their behavior. But I'd seen more often than not. I'm right so much impatient FRIK. Kirsten would always think it's somebody's going to save a life in route to a burning building and I'm like everyone's a monster. I think percentage wise. I'm more often right. Okay I think in some ways you're right. I think people are acting like assholes. I don't think they're on their way to whatever but it's probably because they had a bad day or something's happening with them is causing this. It's not just that they're a bad person right right. Yeah yeah that's true that's true. I'm both things so so quite often. Having children makes semi impossible to get out of the house. So I'm often late or I'm trying to make up now. You could go well then. Just keep backing up when you start the process which is great. That's legit but boy. You know you gotta feed them and this and that and the packing and the tantrums in the Melt Bounds. Wardrobe changes all of it. Leaves me probably on the highways going somewhere later than we should? Yeah and I'm entitled trick so both things are happening. If I cut you off in traffic both people are gonNA be right situational and it was an entitled Prick but just because you had a hard time getting out the door in your late doesn't mean you have to cut people off. You can still just say sorry. When you get to the place you got and not make more carnage on your way well. Yes Oh here's another thing. I think of quite often is 'cause I both do it and I'm the victim or recipient of which is I drive fast. I like to fuck and drive fast. Joy It yes on for me like it and I. I never understood why anyone is getting maximum. Not inconveniencing them. If I'm in the left lane I go by going ten miles an hour faster near going. It no sweat off your back. There's nothing happening to you yet. Occasionally people will flipping off Hong or do whatever they do and I'm just happily with a smile on my face driving to work quickly. There's no aggression on my and there's no anger. There's no malice yet. I'll be on the highway and for whatever reason I'm not in the mood to go fast. I'm just listening to a podcast and influence and someone will blow me and my first thought. My Brussel is like God. That guy's aggressive. You might be there. Smiling listen to Christopher Cross sailing there might be no rush into it but it's funny because it's the exact same behavior but when I do it it's peaceful and loving and you just like to drive fast but when someone else. They're aggressive and impatient and all these things. Yeah but it's also that people driving insanely fast. It makes other people scared. So it's it's fair to be like this person's driving too fast because if even if if you were driving next year driving super fast and I got an accident with you and if it was my fault even like the chances at one of us are dead is way higher. Well I don't think so to be honest with you. I don't think the difference between crashing at sixty five and eighty is a big difference. Just percentage wise if you hit. Oh let's say this if you hit a wall anything over forty five your debts or fifty five or something. There's a point where the damage is the damage now at skin. Accordion quicker something. But I don't think there's a big difference between crashing into a Wallet eighty-five and crash into all sixty five. I think you're a goner. Maybe I don't know I really don't know I'm going to do some experiments. I'm going to crash into a wall sixty-five and say how I feel. We're GONNA crush eighty-five. Yuck this is an episode. That is very mental health. Heavy talk a lot about mental health which I love And he was so open and vulnerable about his struggles. Yeah it's hard. It's hard to be happy it. Isn't it always begs the question? Why why is mental health pandemic level? That's what was the first question when the DSM SAM was created and they started being able to administer the standardized tests to millions of Americans. That conclusion was either. This test is too sensitive. And it's labeling too many people with mental health issues or there's a pandemic of mental health. I'm inclined to think it's the lack of mental health. You mean I'm inclined to think it's the latter that there is pandemic levels of depression and different issues. Yeah I think it's very very common so common definitely and then you start. You have to ask yourself why it was this. The mental state of Human Beings one hundred thousand years ago. I can't imagine I was thinking about this the other day watching an animal show and I was thinking. There's no way an animal is designed and has evolved to live in mental anguish. There's just there's no upside to and then I just started thinking. It has to be a result of like this weird life. We have that were that. Were not designed to have yeah. I think it's a result of life getting too big Which also leads to higher levels of thinking which is great and has a ton of positives but also comes with some lows. So I think it's one of those like you can't have the good with the bad yet. It's almost it's like one of the issues has to simply. Just be the amount information you have access to. So fifty thousand years ago you'd being tribe and you'd probably be aware of one or two other neighboring tribes and that'd be your full extent of the knowledge of the world so you want me finding out that there's some earthquake in Haiti and then a pandemic in China then the stock market crash in Germany. Like just all these epic problems. Yeah that SPAN THE GLOBE. That are all in your head. None of that stuff would have been in your head. Also like probably a sense of powerlessness. We have an anxiety. Because when you're in that group of one hundred members of you could actually enact a change you could control your whole world. Yeah and then the mix of crazy fast pace mixed with totally sedentary lifestyle as far as not being physically active sitting and everywhere you go. There's a lot and what's interesting is there's no going back clearly. We're not going back to the Stone Age. So then you have to be pragmatic about okay. Well then his we're GONNA have to get these medicines better and better and better so that they can augment what whatever things being displaced in her head. Something must correct for that. Yeah and is that the future where we're going to have to be medicated. In a way that makes our our environment jive with our reptilian wiring well and just more awareness probably more research about the brain and the chemicals and what releases dopamine. I've been there. I mean they're already is so much research but I'm sure that's going to continue and maybe there are things we don't know that can unlock some of that stuff. Naturally just like exercise now. We know there might be other things we don't know yet. I'm just a little pessimistic. When the solution is like a behavioral adjustment when applied to the seven billion people like like everyone can take a pill in the morning. Look at it in terms of like surgeries are Gen- I mean. They vary all over the body but like back surgeries. They're like fifty percents successful on average. It's such a low percentage yet. People refuse to do physical therapy and they know physical therapy like ninety. Plus percent of the time fixes a problem whereas the surgery only half the time fixed in that particular case in. So I'm just always so pessimistic about if there's a behavioral solution to all of it. Well people adapt it. It's kind of interesting that your pessimistic about it because you are a part of a group that has made a lot of behavioral change. Yeah and unfortunately. The success rate of that program is at its best estimation like thirty percent. Yeah so you know way. More people try it and don't achieve sobriety than try and achieve sobriety but alas there's no better solution so even the lower percentage one is still the best solution. That's true I don't know well it depends. I guess it depends on the person but we also more knowledge. It's like this this podcast. Talking about these things makes people feel not alone in that helps and so when we have people on talk about. This is what I'm doing and this helps me then. I think it encourages other people to make those changes to I. Also think like kind of like you say that in order to make a change your hair us to be on fire. You really have to be in trouble. I do think that's true. I think a lot of people once they hit like real low low they do start thinking. Okay what I'll I hope they do. This are thinking. What can I do to call this a bit? I mean even been on the lower end of the happiness spectrum for a bit and a few days ago I was like I gotta figure this out and I remember years ago when I had a ton of anxiety and panic I was doing stuff to get out of it like I was meditating and I was really good about exercising and I was seeing my therapist regularly and then I climbed out of it and I didn't need to do those things as stringently as I was and now I feel like okay. GotTa get back in those routines because those helped. I think it's like once you feel the benefits. You can tap back in a little. You sure I totally agree. I will also point out though. You're also someone who's not a procrastinator by nature so like thing for you. It took like three days of misery before you're like okay. I got to do something. And you're someone that doesn't push it off now. You just like extend that to someone who is a huge procrastinator and didn't do their homework which is a big section of the world and I just get a little pessimistic. I mean I do think I should have been more proactive a month ago. So it wasn't like it was three days. It was a buildup of three days of really low to get there. But I mean. I don't know. I believe that people can help themselves. I believe a lot of people can help themselves. Also hopefully all of this thought in conversation and research continues to go further upstream. I mean you like to hope that a good percentage of this is is childhood related and I feel like we could improve the childhoods. Yeah that's a lot of pressure on parents. Oh it is. I don't think parents I think there needs to be more systems in place to help children. Yeah you know I think like Child Care became something that we subsidize offered and then it had to have a lot of like emotional components to the training like you know if we actually invested in put some effort into giving little kids tools and yeah you like to think it would be a lot easier down. Downriver I agree okay a couple things. He said. Japan Colonized Korea in the early nineteen hundreds nineteen..

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