Charlotte Snyder, Engineer, Shar discussed on Kingdom Mom
Hakin demands. Welcome back to another episode of the Kingdom Mom podcast. I'm so excited for you to meet my friend Charlotte Snyder. We call her shower around here. But I'm so excited for you to meet her In the next three episodes we're going to get to chat with Shar. We'RE GONNA be talking first of all about her story so shards a little different on in the respect of some of the people that we interviewed because she actually did not become a Christian until she was thirty nine years old. But she's GonNa talk about kind of her journey and how that actually happened and if you are somebody who You know you're maybe trying to Disciples and people in your life Sorry that was like a Super Christian term disciple trainer. Earn influence with people in your life is how I like to look at it because you do have to earn influence I highly encourage you to listen to these episodes because Sharon I talk about how we actually both Were converted to Christianity. So let's just dive right in. Can't wait for you to meet her all right so we've already been laughing. I'm talking here with my good friend. Sure Snyder and we're kind of just talking about her story a little bit. I'm going to let Shar share. Shar share that's a tongue twister. But man girl. Okay so first of all if you don't know Shar Snyder. She is gorgeous. She often gets mistaken for a celebrity. I'll ever tell that story but sharp for those of you who don't know you and and really I feel like I haven't even heard this full story. Tell us kind of your walk your journey in your faith and how you got to where you are today from a faith perspective or are we just from your perspective or Mike Respective Okay. So I grew closer to leave it to beaver than the apposite. A very very rural on a farm we raise sheep. We had horses really really hard working family. My folks got a veterinarian and my folks own their own practice so we worked in the business when we were younger. Just amazing amazing humans. My parents were And it was almost like they seem to do everything right. They were kind loving generous. They were super hardworking. They absolutely had no face. They had been so hurt. Both of them personally as well as my grandparent's that they just they didn't they only stop paying from it and I didn't know any different pain caused from God's people not I got. My parents didn't know any different either but they dent at the same time. They never condemned. They never criticized an amid. They never judged anybody that was a fit so I was raised to accept and not reject fades. But at the same time that was not part of our lives. As a matter of fact they son us to A private Christian school because they had a better academic program and I can remember going thinking the civilly interesting because I always had to sit in the very back when we would go to church that day because I wasn't a Christian and I was always super ostracized by the system but I was never offended by because I knew I was different and I'm like well in different. That's okay it's interesting but but that's okay so fast for my life and I can remember like going with different friends. We take me to church and seeing different things but what always seem to notice was what I heard and what was taught seem to play out very differently and what my friends were actually doing or people within the community that I noticed the choices that they were making like okay. Those two things don't seem to match. There's not a lot of jiving going on but again it was just people so the underlying word that seem to occur with my family and with me was hypocrisy. He saw a lot of hypocrisy. And we personally felt a lot of judgement so I can see looking through my life that there're different choices that I made because I had no faith I didn't know it at the time but I poured my identity massively into whatever is in front of me so I'm a type of person that pours one hundred ten percent into whatever. I'm focused on putting my heart in zoo so I it was being a cleasing daughter so I did my best to live up to my parents expectations. I was a child. I paid every sport. I got the hardest undergraduate degree in college. I could think of to try to impress my dad and me as interested in it but it was you know. It was chemical engineering. It was no joke but Hammond a for myself into it. I dated a boy for seven years and was actually the engaged to him now. My husband's And I absolutely poured my life into pleasing him and my identity into pleasing him and then going from there accord it into my career working as an engineer and do my best to climb that corporate ladder and then I my husband and then I caught myself in a ham and then we had a baby and I became a stay at home. Mom Day that we have the child and that was not the plan. I was actually the breadwinner. I made really good money. I was working as an engineer. I traveled all the time I was in what they called technical service so I would take the products that we had. We were in personal care and I would go to something like a memorial and look at a makeup product that they were working on. And how could we make better? And how can we help them? And so it was like a lot a lot of brain power and I just remember. My pregnancy was tough. I was on bed rest for the last five months of it because I had spotting every single day and I was constantly at risk to lose the child and I remember having her and sitting there looking at her number one going him so unqualified. I didn't watch so like I didn't want children until I met my husband. I was going to be a total career woman. Bat was going to be my identity and I. I didn't anticipate the love that would happen in having a baby I had no idea and I just remember sitting there at homeless thinking. Oh my goodness in four weeks I need to go back to work and I realized I hated my identity aid worked so hard for it and I hated it and it was wrapped up in something that just makes sense and looking at her I was like I can't go back to work and I remember saying to my husband. Bless his heart. I I can't do. It can't thankfully he was like. Oh Kay gotshall figure it out and you know what we did. We managed and I will say me becoming a stay at home. Mom was one of the things that completely sabotaged. Their marriage is strained. That might sound because on the one hand I know it was right for our family but again I totally lost my identity overnight here I was. I will gorgeous suits traveling all over high heels relief case the whole nine yards using serious brain power on a daily basis. And now I need to do is Wipe Abud feeder every once in a while trying to get some sleep because she slept terribly and just make sure we're both alive and the house doesn't them by the end of the day it was just addressed exchange. Wow Wow and that's so true and I think a lot of MOMS can relate to that it's like our identity you know when we don't have our identity tied to where it should be tied to. I mean when it's when it's Abou our career when it's about or even the role of being a mob like when our identity is so wrapped up in what we are doing every single day. It's like a crisis is a crisis when that changes so okay so now what happens. So now you will go from powerhouse. Career Woman Chemical Engineer to wife Butts every day. So whether they'll look like yes totally an I again. I put myself into that foote finance sinker so I didn't have any faith. I didn't know that there was a god to turn. My mom became my best friend. Not My husband. My mom lives amazing like she should. She should have been anyone. That's run which the alignment was incorrect. And I didn't know that at this time so I became the woman that solely focused on my child and because of it I completely push my husband onto the picture. He didn't know how to feeder right. He didn't know how to change her right heathen he just. He didn't do anything right. Just let me do it. And if pushed him away so badly from her end from me as well and it caused a lotteries mind you. I didn't know this at the time. Trust me I was so justified and self righteous in all this because what he started doing because of it is working ninety to one hundred hours a week. He was never home so then. I was justified in Matt. He's not helping me N- he's now pulling his way in doing his heart but then he get caught in this dichotomy of. Yeah but I'm also not providing to the income of the household. So there's it's like there's this constant fight within my soul that was going. He's not telling me I'm doing all the work but I'm not contributing financially therefore he doesn't have to and it was a constant back and forth battle within me in what happened. I mean that's at it just used and then we had another child and then we had a third child and it just it got worse and worse and worse to the point where Seven years ago. This may my mom. She passed away and it was quite son and she like just phenomenal woman. I am blessed to have generation really in credible women.