Andy, East Town, Naomi discussed on Couples Therapy

Couples Therapy
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Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Comedy show? Sure. Naomi and Andy. Absolutely. So she could try it every couple's therapy. It reiteration. Every option. Baby girl. Baby girl. Just saying what you got one foot out the motherfucking dough. Okay. And now you have to live with this person for a few months and you know you don't want to be with them no more, but you don't want to tell them because you got to live with them and you don't want it to be awkward as shit. And it's my fucking lazy. So they not watch the dishes. You already hate the bitch 'cause you don't wanna be with them no more. Everything they do annoys you anyway when the bitch breathe, you be like, why you gotta breathe, but your lungs like that, you raggedy bitch. And then washing dishes, they leave in the toilet seat up. They ain't never mopped the floor. Floor been unmarked for months. I get it. That's a lot, but since I'm gonna have to say, you can and I literally talk to this bell or this guy working at a hotel last night, we connected because he was from Pittsburgh, and he was saying he lived with somebody right now a partner for three months that they had broken up for three months. They've been broken up. So it's like if you're this amicable and you guys know the relationship is already on the Fritz and you know it's over. You don't have to pretend. I think it's better to just be like, look, these are COVID times. It's been a crazy time. We know we don't want to be together anymore. We gonna be roommates for a couple more months. Let's do our part, do our chores because right now you're in a gray area where you're tiptoeing around this person. And if you break up with them, then you can be like John, get your fucking underwear out the living room bitch. Okay, like, you know, you can just be more free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think? Definitely, you should break up. And make the breakup official. Because the long breakup is like the I just think the worst kind. And to be honest, the couple's therapist probably has something to say about individual therapy as well, because there's probably been there probably was a breakup point a few years ago and but like your wives are intertwined, ten years is a very long time. It's a small town. Yep, small town. It's like, this is clearly entering, if not already fully entrenched in messy territory. And I feel like the cleaner wherever you can get some clarity that is a positive. And I definitely think they need to break up. Even though it's like sad, yeah, obviously. It's like living together is sad. This is sad. The whole thing's already said. Right, right. So don't be worried about that part. Like, gotta clean up. Y'all clean up. You're already in mayor of east town. So you can as well. There's no coincidence it's always sunny at this point. It's so dark gloomy Philly. Also, once you make that choice, I think, to finally be done, that's when you can like do the fun stuff like start looking for apartment. You know what I mean? There are things that then you can just step into that world and you can start your life as a single person, maybe for a couple months living with someone. I will also say, if you're just a way for you not to live with him for the next couple months, that is feasible for you. I just think you should. There's nothing good that's going to happen in the next two months with him, but at the very least, if that's not feasible for you, at the very least, you need to break up fast, be honest about it. Just so that you can start the process of buying cute things for your apartment, finding a new place, like all that stuff is at least exciting, you know? Just open a Pinterest account of your dreams. You were whispering a little bit. Was he in the house? Oh, it was low. I know. I was like, you don't have anything. She was like, listen, I'm trying with this red. It was gluey. It was loose. Yeah. It was. But she could blame the cat. The cat was just sort of like reclined on the bed. It was kind of brutal. The cat do the shit with tears. In a way, it was like, I'm having the best time since this cat was like, girl, if you don't give me out of here, get the friskies, pack our shit up, and let's go. By the way, we are going to spend my life when you said that Catherine tasted like chips or the dogs think it's all I can think about now is tasting cat food. I'm not even kidding. It's all I can think about. Andy, you had a girlfriend in a long time ago where y'all had two or three breakups, right? Yeah. So that whole back and forth. What girlfriend? Huh? I said Andy, you had a girlfriend. I did. I did guys. He had many, and it's a very upsetting. So did you like, how did y'all finally what was the final straw to be like, we are broken up for real for real? Because it wasn't the fact that she didn't believe in evolution. That was another. I did a woman who was an evangelist. Oh, that's a different person. Okay, that's a different situation. Okay. Although we did break up and then get back together. But this first one, that was, I'm sorry, I'm trying to think of what I can say. It was we were past the statute of limitations. You can put this out there. No, I'm just like, we were physically compatible, but I don't want to hear that. I don't want to hear that. Who wants to hear that? Come on. I don't want to hear it now. At home tonight, I don't know what you're doing. I'm just saying that's why we kept getting back together because we like smooching. How's that? That's very sweet. But that's the issue about what you're saying too about living with this person because my whole thing is like, you're going to have accidental sex. You know what I mean? Like if you stay living in this house with this person you're like, 'cause she's like, I signed a lease already. She said she's on the leaves. And I'm like, does that mean the partner doesn't know? She did. She's running. It's giving me the least for another apartment. Well, 'cause she was like, I put a lease out, but because of the college town, the place isn't gonna be free until July. Like when the kids listen, but I'm like, does he not know or does he know and you don't understand anything like this? I'm like, what is up? I mean, he doesn't know. I'm in to say he doesn't know. Because if she signed, if I'm dating somebody, and we've gotten to the point where we move in and then I'm like, I'm about to go live by myself. That's something if you knew that you would know the relationship have to break up now. Yes. And they've been breaking up for a while. They need to live now. Figure out some sort of living situation. They have friends, if they have like, I don't even know if they can try to pool together something and split the money on Facebook or whatever some people have like a room or something. Crawl space. Crawl space. Crossing. I'll say you know who gets who gets custody of the cat? You got to decide that. And in the college town, you can usually always find some pretty affordable living. When I lived in Pittsburgh, I had a four bedroom two story apartment and it was $400 a month for four of us. Oh my goodness. It was cheaper than my whole rip by myself. I'm like girl, you can find you another place for a few months. Can all Airbnb..

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