Like a ally and the dating rise. It's hard for me to actually date. Water sides well. Aquarius is an air sign. I know. I know. I was just thinking of water. Sense is scorpio. So i should be dating water signs not necessarily i mean you do have a lot of water in your chart but sometimes what happens when there's too much of the same element is that it gets kind of like especially with water. Gets kind of murky like for instance. I was on this podcast. Which was hosted by a cancer and a scorpio and it was all about how they're both perpetually single and how they are unhappy to be perpetually single and i was like you guys know that you're like enabling each other and it's like you are not going to meet someone if you are building your whole brand around being perpetually single and they're like whoa like never thought about it like that but that's like to water signs were like. I'm feels i'm in my feels. So sometimes i think it's really good to have different kinds of energy Activate different areas and yes. I'm obsessed with your areas mars. I'm so envious of areas. Mars my stupid ass virgo. Mars like is so meticulous is so like it has to be perfect. I can't do it. It has to be everything has to be right. An areas mars. That just like let's just go. Let's do the thing i mean. That's literally what you said. We started going. Let's just start recording. Let's go let's go areas mars obsessed with it and but also remember by aries mars than how like i also read about how arie's mars When it comes to love even though my passion and it just said like how. I like when ben to me and all these things and i'm like oh that's such an i am very unpredictable am very i kind of like my motto is asks for fruit. I rather like ask for forgiveness is kinda my motto liquor rather do something and then deal with the consequences later. That's always been hyman lifelike of always been a rebel growing up. And i still am right now and i feel like a lifetime even invading enthralled guys. Because i'm very unpredictable. And like i can be hot and cold. 'cause i feel like my signs or it's just my personality and then some areas will come out and they'll be like she just make out right now like we're late last through this and then i'll be like what if i made me and i'm like well right now. So let's talk about your saturn return a little bit If you can go back in time to late two thousand seventeen saturn would have just entered capricorn. It would have been exactly activating your natal. Saturn is zero degrees capricorn. So this december twenty seventeen january twenty eighteen that was like the crux of your saturn return. i would say two thousand seventeen was around the time that i publicly came out as daddy issues. That wasn't anonymous anymore I think so. Maybe that's where. Mike was changing a little daddy issues or was that when i got really depressed. Was it that all art. When i was reloaded us. Did i did battle with depression sometime into. It could have been. Actually when i was like my most depressed self without makes sense. Yeah it would. Yeah i think. I struggled like depression. I couldn't understand yet. Because i didn't understand my emotions yet fully. I think i battled depression and gain weight towards the end of the year. And that and i would say like like it. Took me a couple of months of figure out what's happening and then i finally like. He came out of it. Yeah i think actually not makes sense i have. I haven't episode of my podcast about depression. And i read a poem that i wrote and using the homeless that towards the end of two thousand seventeen and it was just about like i remember. I did not suppressed. Until i came home and i sat down in a row and then when i read the poem afterwards like the next morning i was looking at it and i was just like i recognize this person because this person sounds like so the price so suicide own is up like i was just like holy shale i in the press like kaieda now realize that and then i remember i told my mom about it and then once i told my mom and talked to buddy on my depression episode is because i hold everything in and a lot of people are that too with the minute you say something out loud. It's no longer inaugur prisoner that secret so say that's true that if three so i felt the press and i was holding all in once i said it to. My mother was like a relief late. Like i'm not a prisoner to depression. Depression and it doesn't have to be a part of anymore and then i I got better. Because i worked through it and that was probably one of the lowest times of being feel like i've had other low times but i i tried really hard to better understand. I i say that's where some of my capricorn aquarius. So my subbed goes like. I'm very i tried to under i need. It's actually mike warious. I need to understand the logical. Meaning of everything. I feel like i just like i get emotions but i need the logical understanding like i can't even even if i'm even sewn hurts me. I need to sit back and understand why they hurt me where it's coming from logically in order for me to get over it so the same thing with depression like one day sat down was okay. I need to do more research about it especially before i might to be crazy episode about depression. Like don't be sad anymore. That's donated episode. I think and it was like i did so much research and i stopped allocate. You can be you can feel you can be sad. You can feel depressed and then you can be the press so three different categories and now throughout my life after two thousand seventeen. I kinda now. Whenever i'm feeling down i will analyze myself to better understand. What am i feeling right now and might depress okay. Am i depressed. I get out of bed the last two days. Have i smile. Because it's like those little things that you think are not a big deal. They are because if you're very depressed you haven't gotten a bet like getting out of bed. Submissions like okay. No i have been like. I've been better lot but it has gone bad okay. How about last smiled at all. And then it's those way. I'd have last the last couple of days. Okay so i'm feeling the press. I'm not impressed. okay. There's more hope. And then i just go to being sad issue. It's just. I don't know so in two thousand seventeen when you.