A highlight from Disenfranchised Grief II


Good morning good afternoon. Good evening wherever you find yourself in this entire world. I welcome you. So how are you doing. My friend my warrior. I certainly hope this week has brought you a little bit more peace. So i i wanted to thank you for all your support your notes of support for our new store the merrimack store. We've had listeners telling us how much they appreciate having something so special for themselves or as a gift for others who are grieving. We're especially excited to share that. We have t shirts not only for adults for children who are grieving and that was really important to me. And if you didn't know the mary. Max stores main intention is to help fund the foundation for grieving children which i established many years ago. I wanted something that would always plant dollars into the foundation for its work to benefit young people who have experienced the death of a loved one. So thank you for your purchases and your love and please share the merrimack store with all your family and friends. You can find it at mary. Mack dot info and look for the tab at the top that simply says store so today. In part two of disenfranchised grief. I like to continue with my thoughts on this subject to certain types of relationships. 'cause this complicated grief whether it's a boss perhaps who's married and who's having an affair with another married co worker. When he dies she simply can't openly proclaim her feelings for him and of course she needs to harbor her grief inside trying desperately to act as if nothing is wrong. How does she handle. This could also be a female. Mary co worker. Who dies and her married. Male colleague is great stricken or even one party was married and the other was not the point is that the survivor is heartbroken and needs desperately to act like the person who died which just another colleague to them even when a pet is killed. People make us feel. We're crazy for being so affected by their death. This was a for baby who made your life so wonderful. They were there for you every day when you woke up when you came home even when they slept with you they traveled with you and you loved walking them and suddenly they were taken from you. You're in shock. How could this happen and on top of it. Your family and friends really don't understand your pain and why you were so affected and can't stop sobbing. Sometimes you even endured the death of an adult sibling and people think it's normal for this to happen and you shouldn't be so sorrowful. why is that about. As i mentioned last week you might have endured the suicide death of a family member or friend. Maybe they overdosed on drugs or murder among others and you feel their judgment. Which stops you from sharing your feelings. The problem with suffering in silence is that you don't have the support when you need it. Most bottling up intense feelings often lead to a deep sense of resentment not to mention all the stress can take a toll on your body which can make you vulnerable to illness when you can express yourself openly. It's hard to move through the grieving process. Disenfranchise grave can produce anxiety shame depression insomnia misuse of drugs and alcohol and stomach pain. It can also cause problems with focusing on your work and everyday tasks and obligations emotional overwhelm and mood swings and problems in relationships. You might feel guilty for their relationship you shared and now you're feeling overwhelming grief. People may be wondering why you're having such reaction to their death. You might be walking on eggshells trying to show your pain if you can confide in others. Who already knew of your loss and pain then do so but if nine you can create rituals to help as well as these suggestions develop a box with all the cards gifts memorabilia that you share together to go back to later on. At least you'll know it's altogether in one place and safe. You might write a good bye letter which you can attached to a balloon or place in your special box. You might make a collage of photos that you shared and freenet hold a lovely memorial in a significant place for you plan to bush or a flowering plant or tree in their honor. Light a candle in a certain place in your home just for them. Visit the cemetery long after the funeral. You might also ask for what you need from others that you trust why you're feeling is natural and normal. All grief is messy. And sometimes in cases of disenfranchised grief it's even messier it's important to be wise whom you share this pain with so. Please be cautious. Let's look at a few other ways to help yourself if you want to attend a bereavement support group to express your pain. You can always find one several towns away where no one knows who

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