Soccer, Fred, Depression discussed on Addiction Unlimited Podcast | Alcoholism | 12 Steps | Living Sober | Addiction Treatment
Thank you for spending some time with me today and listening to the pod. I'm always happy to spend the afternoon with you. I know you guys are probably listening while you we're at the gym or driving in the car but if you remember later try to log onto apple podcasts and leave us a review reviews or super important in the podcast world so you can take. I don't know sixty seconds or so and leave us a review in itunes. I will love love love you for that so let's get into today's show you guys are GonNa love this. I know I always say that but I think it's usually true and it is today to we are talking to Daniel Henderson who at three years sober fell two hundred feet off a cliff while he was hiking in Utah. This is an incredible story and he he has remained sober and then of course has done all this healing from traumatic brain injury and broken bones and all stuff. It's incredible but the story is so good too because believe it or not Daniels twenty two years old in he is coming up on four years sober so I'm GonNa stop talking about him and I'm GonNa let him talk about himself for us. Daniel thank you so much for being here. Oh though probably more that have to do this okay six this experience so tell everybody of course I prefaced it a little bit but tell everybody a little bit about you and your story well of as you heard Dave's Daniel I grew up in Cincinnati Ohio of had a dad who is an Entrepreneur Oda Job Coaching Career Coaching Business Bob. She was worth a stay at home while she works part time but she pretty much stayed home with by brother. Die Great family played soccer lots of sports hiking backpacking backpacking family was huge outdoors especially by dad fighting off the beaten path spots like cool trails cool restaurants go a lots of cool adventures adventures of throughout the United States so I had a good childhood Ed upper middle class upbringing. The reason why I say that is because recovery even though everything appears great of the outside everything started fall apart at time of its side just because I from a decent family does not be I could not suffer from substance abuse disorder that the health issues with it. It's so true threw in you. I mean a lot of that is starting to change right because we have so many more people speaking openly about addiction so some of that perception China starting to change but it's still pervasive people still think like they have that visual when you say you're an alcoholic like they think you have to be homeless living under the bridge and drinking out of the Brown paper bag and it's like no people from all walks of life get this. You're exactly right. It does not discriminate the first part of alcoholics anonymous. The first step is talking about manageability. It does not have to be that you your life is so eventually end up under a bridge it could be that your life's imaginable to the point. You just gave a dido class or you catch show up to work. If you're going to work at your functional that that you're drinking on the job at its affected your relationships at work or with your wife or your husband so it. What does that have to be the person under the bridge right? I ended up under a bridge but prior to that I was. I was with a state state science fair. I was played high level club soccer baking the State Cup semifinals lots of Fred's girlfriend things of that nature plus Laissez was trying to start up a environmentally-friendly law crew at Cincinnati Ohio so I was extremely driven of everything could ask for cool vacations vacations it. You'd think with all that stuff why drink your braids out 'cause alcohol's vigil choice <unk> a lot of drugs but alcohol what always back to at alcoholism at other Substance Abuse Disorders are disease wait. How old were you when you realized sized that you're drinking was a problem seventeen? Did you have like a specific event like something that happened. That made you go. Oh Wow I need to look at this or like. How did it happen for you like I always talk about for me? I recognized that my relationship was doc with alcohol was different. I recognize like I wanted to spend more time with alcohol than my friends. Did you know like at the end of the night when the bar closed my friends were happy to go home and I would always be thinking. Why are they going home? When we could drink more like those are the first things I started to notice that that I just did it differently you know what was it for you as it any event or where was it small things? It was swallow things that lead to a big a couple big events but I took a heavy schedule schedule by junior year of high school outed of A._p.. Classes accelerate Spanish play club soccer her which was travel so we travel the play soccer. The first semester was pretty somewhat decent. I definitely partied but <unk> go. I got decent grades. I got like a two point five three point. Oh it wasn't style stellar. It was average but by the second semester of junior year I got really depressed issues that whole with parrots plus extremely hyperactive it alcohol calls as you doubt. I spoke the TATO eat. I was Kinda Hippie to sort of outdoors. I love the grateful dead. I love doors. I love fish love slightly stupid reggae Bob Marley so I definitely spoke to lead. That's of calls. We dowd takes edge off plus with all the stuff going on at home. We'll start us a lot more heavily. I started become extremely depressed. I was not thinking right. I started threatening to kill myself. I ended up it it with children's Hospital <unk> Ohio of those first one that was the sex bester junior year of high school at that it was off to the races says with mental health hospital stays from that one till the end of the suffer at the end of the summer of junior year go into Cedar I I had about fifty to twenty psychiatric visits at stopped showing up to school. I started drinking vibrate. Sell Smoke. We Lost Islah Fred's. I started forty checks right. Parrots Ed Call from stores. I don't know how did not get caught. We log a year to get caught but I still thought a stuff. I was dale eligible to play soccer because my grades are bad. Exciting wasn't showing up multiple suicide attempts at three by second semester of junior year so that takes me to senior the year. I was depressed <unk>. I lost two friends. No one really wants to be around me. Why fairly too much to do with they wanted me to get healthy but was refused to do anything he really a healthy <unk> higher drug so what day is solely parents credit card it for whatever reason I got really high drug with people people do got a hotel room at I said if I went to Seattle though it changed my problems so parents credit card? I don't know why did take a flight but I bought a Greyhound L. Ticket to Seattle Washington from Cincinnati. which is I mean it would be dazed right? It was a day it was a couple of days agree. I was just played used by parents hurts credit card by hotels support myself. That's so screwed up by thicky was or sleep on the side of the road. Would you say you were you know the the majority of us with addiction also have some level of anxiety depression and typically A._D._d.. Right because it's the same area of the brain so for wiring is a little off off to have one of those things we usually have all of them and I say different levels because I think it's different for everybody like my depression has always been pretty manageable but I've had times that my anxiety is almost debilitating you know. Would you say because you were so young and you had all those psych hospital visits. Do you think that you were self medicating the mental health stuff with your drinking and smoking pot like it was it made you feel better. Yes that is exactly what I was doing. That's why with the mental health side. It's a lot more than just I can't stop. That was the real reasons as I was using plus. I was so energetic. It just called me Dell Right. It's interesting too because these are the conversations I love to have because a lot of us are different. Those details can be different and for me. I say I was almost an accidental alcoholic because I oh I didn't start drinking for those reasons right like when I was a younger person I didn't really start drinking tie was about twenty years old anyway and when I was in high school and stuff I was was a very well adjusted confident normal kid. You know what I mean. I didn't have anxiety then and I certainly was having depression. <hes> <hes> so for me. I started working in a bar and once I started working in a bar then I was surrounded by alcohol all the time like everybody drank all the time and it just became very normal to me to drink every day because everybody I saw drink every day so I kind of fell into it almost by accident but that's not a standard story either so I love to kind of highlight some of those differences too because we have so many listeners to whose stories are going to be different. You know yeah everyone's story who suffers from the diction is different. It's some people's work could bars star Dr Tricky. The restaurant industry is huge with you. Work hard definitely work hard that you have that work hard play hard attitude see work like a twelve hour day away. You go get drunk. You go at high whatever it is a lot of people who work at restaurants or young too so it's part of a lot of people party. That's completely fine it. I definitely had my fair share. I have a lot of friends that don't have a problem at party. They have fun but I just can't so that's why I don't do do it but with a restaurant kind of the atmosphere and a lot of those people have ended up having problems or work at a restaurant so you fall into to a place of people a lot of suffer from these issues so you watt surround yourself with your they say you're Fred's our future so so you have to be careful about who you surround yourself by specialists alcoholism addiction subsidies disorder at the health for sure. You really really be kerfuffle. It's so true in this is another piece. I think people struggle with often too when they get sober is people have family members that don't don't really understand the seriousness of the disease and they don't really understand that you can't have even a single drink you know or people with spouses says I've been dealing with this a lot. <hes> was some clients where having a spouse that still drinks because maybe they don't drink alcoholic right but they don't understand like why can't you have have one or two so it's such an important piece to get to that. Even more important that you surround yourself with people who nourish are issue in who you want to be because you have to have that support you have to have that acceptance. It's so important to have that acceptance to from the people that you love. I couldn't hang out with people that it only drank and I still have a lot of drinking friends and I love them dearly but I wouldn't be as healthy if I only hung out with drinking people all the time. I have to be around so for people to yeah. I completely understand that a lot of by direct obedient fairly those drake by Dad's as drake really at all or by evolve will have a glass of wine now dead but they're not drinking but by extended family drake's some of them understand it other doodo understand <hes>. I've had some friends even at sobriety we talk about Seraglio ourselves around people. We want to be by for a good future just because you're sober does stop by your healthy. It just feeds you're sober. It's so misunderstood I personally had to do. It's a type of therapy. That's really good which which changed my life with two years of sobriety treatment for travel televise stuff was breakup with girlfriends yeah that was odd treated in law theives <unk> interpersonal relationship issues parrots family issues stuff like that lot of times it sobriety people talk about it so that's what happened to be. I had underlying issue of <unk> <unk> personal relationship issues of P._T._S._d.. About was caused by the failure issues break up with girlfriends that was it plus had low self-esteem so lead us to your accident and falling off the cliff. How long were you sober? Where were you when it happened? Tell the listeners that story well. I just picked up three or sobriety by accident happened at Salt Lake City Utah. There's a lot of outs out. They're big <unk> outdoors community. It's beautiful. I love living there. It is beautiful. It's a beautiful city. I was hiking it Wa- Sach National Forest at Lisa Falls <unk> located which is like Alta Ski Resort Lot of ski resorts throughout their awesome place but I was hiking with Hi I don't remember it looks absolutely beautiful. I was hiking the trail. We are all the side of a cliff and I stepped on a rock in the middle of the trail. Add because of the side of a cliff was probably roughly around eight thousand feet. It just gave way it just broke like the whole ground under a your feet just gave out. Yes Ed. I fell with it. If Fred saw he was just watching Me Fall Thou- the Siva cliff of it was not vertical is about two hundred total but it was be hitting rocks trees creeks anything that was there. He watched me fall. All the way down at that is scary as one of my best friends still is today it plus. I asked him to go hiking. 'cause he was isolating. It was kind of pressed so he it felt like worse because I was trying to be a service ED. You know I've the one who felt the cliff. He felt awful so he made his way to be.