Honey, Soccer, NBA discussed on Parenting Great Kids with Dr. Meg Meeker

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That's a great suggestion. And they can do it online better than you can pair. What a wonderful way to eleven year old how much it costs to run a family today. Right. My encouragement appearances. Hey, you can do it. Just like your sweet mom and dad data the things that I say with parents. And I think this is what puts a lot of heat on their kids as that. Parents are extremely competitive with one another and in from what I've seen is this, you know, parents feel they need to have their child be the best soccer player. So that he's better than their friends. He needs they need to help him create a portfolio from the time is seven or eight. So he can get into the best high school get into the best college. And I think that sometimes kids feel overwhelmed with performing well enough for their parents. And even though parents will say, oh, yeah. Haters plays soccer for fun. The reality is he really doesn't. He he really feels that in order to please his parents he needs to hyper perform have you had a similar experience or something different redo. We're gonna. Food group a kid out of school truly short of eighth grade, graduations, we can play basketball again, it's Nayef greater and help them. Get the NBA. I mean, how stupid stupid I mean? It's amazing. The lengths the parents will go there highly competitive one of the things if people have followed Leeman books, I always underscore. If you want to be helpful to your kids, your family to your husband, your wife realized how I'm perfect you are and don't be afraid to share your, imperfection. Think of people. You're drawn to adults. Are you drawn to people who have all lives answered near back in their back pocket. Do you like down to earth people who taught like it is? Right. So I I air on the side of trying to make the complex simple. But I think life is a lot simpler Magda were making it out to be a man, I wholeheartedly agree with you in your book. You write about the top ten principles for handling life hurts. Well, can you talk about what some of those principles are very simple things. I don't have fun of me. That trio could've got on kissed my book within within reach. But they're simple things. Like, you know, teaching responsibility listening to children establishing that life isn't always fair. And there are situations in life people in life. That will hurt you. There's you know is just sort of a a bare bone approach. That is parents we give kids what I call vitamin E, which is encouragement, and we're brave enough to tell them. No, that's fight Amon. An and we have a balanced approach to rearing kids. And I think when you do that you end up, quite frankly with a pretty well, balanced kin who can face the the evidence Aries in life in the peer group. And I think what makes my books. Order unique is if you think parents are minute about what you would say to your kid when your kid is really hurting think of the words, you would say, oh Honey is going to be okay. Owning don't worry about it. Honey, sure, you're not imagining that Honey don't worry. I'll take care of that for you all those things are destructive with your kid. And so teaching parent first of all to listen to your kit when they're heard it because when you give him one of those old Honey don't worry about it. The kids thinking, wait a minute. I'm sharing my deepest feelings with these people who say they love me more than anything in this earth. And they just blew me off. And they're not the ones being called pizza face at school..

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