Doctor Frieda, Dr Feta Birnbaum, Saddle River discussed on Ken Broo

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Everybody knows that Saturday afternoon right to have you with us. Now, some of you, not maybe not you because I think you probably got a good handle on what life is all about. But there may be someone you know, maybe someone you love or close to you that just at this moment cannot enjoy the weekend because they're dreading going to work on Monday. The call it the scary Sundays, but for some people that begins on Saturday, where you just either because you don't like where you work or you don't like to work, or you just have some other things that you're dealing with that is causing you to do this. Maybe it's all of those things that has you dreading going to work on Monday. You can't even enjoy the weekend because of it. There's a new survey. That's out that says eight out of ten people get the Sunday, scary anxiety over going to work on Monday and it ruins your weekend. In fact, nearly half of those anxious over the work week that will begin for most of us on. Monday resort to drinking alcohol to try and somehow someway deal with it. That's never good thing, where you've got to resort to alcohol deal with anything, not a good thing. But what are the scary Sundays, how you can avoid them? And if you're not someone that shall we say, is hammered with your job on Monday. What can you do to figure out how to make this not part of your weekend, in ruin that we have had Dr free to on with as many times before? And we love Dr frito, because she's a woman of great knowledge and a woman of great sensibilities. In fact, she has all of those things, and it's one of the reasons why she's in high demand for a lot of shows around the country. So I feel absolutely fortunate that on this son, this, Saturday, doctor Frieda. Birnbaum is going to join us here on seven hundred wwl W and Dr frito, welcome back to Cincinnati. And how are you on this Saturday? I am great. Thank you so much. You'll always great. That's the time we have you on your great. That's why we love having you. On. Generous, thank you, all, I like to think I'm honest to. But here's the there are a lot of people that just absolutely dread work. They live for five o'clock on Friday and along about Sunday. One two o'clock in the afternoon. They fall into this phobia that they're absolutely apoplectic of having to go back to work now. Anytime there's something like that in your life, regardless of what it might be it means. You have a problem dealing with reality. But why, why do so many people have trouble dealing with this doctor Frieda? It's very scary. We have a few days off, and instead of really being in the moment on my goes ready to something that's anxiety, provoking and we can't really enjoy ourselves and the reality is that when we do go back to work. Guess what? It's not even that bad. And sometimes it's even good to get away from the kids and you get away from responsibilities, you know, mowing the lawn or whatever that is, you have to do we tell ourselves we give certain information, but we scare our selves, and we end up with anxiety, and we don't even know why you have to realize we need to look at. What is really going on writing down the event? What happens on Monday when you get back to work, wait a minute to bosses and so bad? I liked to connect to some of the co workers, I have some downtime as well. So we have to look at reality rather than a memories that we make for ourselves because we end up believing what we're saying, so Monday, can actually base something good. If you reinvented, and you write a down, and you see it for what it is actually rewiring your brain. And then, you know, they are terms that they call contrast affect which means. That if you think of things and the other way in contrast. And of course, you start believing that as well, such as, if you have pain, it could have been mild pain. Not so bad pain. If you believe that it was really bad pain. Then you think that, that's what you really had you forget the initial experience that we have to really know what it is? That is scaring us. You know, we talked about some of the percentages. But, you know, when you are living your life you should not let worries into fear, because they will turn into false concept and affect the weekend, as you know, with less sleep, a rapid pulsa being snappy at people around you and people will wonder, you know, what's wrong with this person. I don't want to be around him anymore. So it's important to really be in the moment to have friends to have social events to be able to even sit down and read. A good book. If you have that kind of opportunity and to know that what you are thinking about that, as horrible is something that you can set up during the week and say, wait a minute. What is it that I will be looking forward to doing on Sunday and really have that day Bessul rather than that day scary? It's like anything in life, doc, I think, is most things that you worry about in life or a logical. Now, if you have some sort of catastrophic illness, or if they're severe financial problems, and you're going through that those are real problems. But by and large most of the things that we get worked up about, for example, having to go to work on Monday and thinking it's just going to be dreadful. Most of it's illogical and I think that's what you're saying, just sit down and think about or put pen to paper and say, hey, wait a minute. This is what's going to happen. This is an another call. This is one of frayed of maybe take it to work with you on Monday and just check off the stuff that that actually happens as opposed to the stuff in your head that you think is going to happen. Does that make absolutely no? And research has shown that belief or judgment about experience experiences. I can't talk today can be at odds with actual experiences. So example, if you go on vacation, you may have had a horrible time, but you come back and think hey, listen, so. Bad. You tell yourself that you had a good time. You know, driving a fancy car. You think you're having more fun in that car, not really. I mean research a show that is no different. But people tell themselves. Hey, I spend all this money. There must be some reason for it. I guess I'm having more fun. So we try to connect our experiences in our feelings so we can make sense out of our lives up at psychologically is a process and we create our own memories. When we do that. So when we looking at where we're going what we're doing if we don't work so hard at it. If we let go and let it happen, then the intensity will be less and the anxiety will be less. So what, what, what if your boss screams at you who cares? What? Should let other people dictate how you feel. I mean that's, that's the root of this. Right. The guy's going to scream at you. Okay. Well, let's him problem. It's only going to last for a moment, and like okay, well, he's a jerk, and I'm probably going to work for somebody else because of that. So I mean, why, why let other people dictate how you feel? Absolutely. You know, also research has shown that the boss is the one that has the left lease tension, even though he has the most responsibilities because he has the most control. When you feel your life is not in control. That's when it does get Gary. But if we discussed the fact that it doesn't really matter that much if it's in control, you don't have to hold onto that stress factor. You can just go ahead on Monday and see that Monday is actually very similar to Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday Friday, and I often say, doc, if you get by Monday, there's only four days left to the weekend. Anyway, that's why they gotta look at Monday get through this. There's only four days left your twenty percent on your way to the next weekend. That's right. And so Mondays if you're retired doesn't feel like any other day. But what if you are not retarded, and you have to go to work? What's the change of pace here, relaxing on Sunday or you're doing nothing? And for anyone even homemakers web to make the lunches prepared. The kids gets who have to go to school. Whatever that is once you in the mode, once you have that momentum, then we need to use it energy being productive is a very healthy part of life. If you're not productive, and you get depressed so to void that kind of depression, we all need purpose to get up in the morning, a place to go a place to make a difference. A place to make a living place that you're feeling that you are told you're doing a great job people like these kind of accolades, and even a student, a housewife someone going to work, we all need to have that in our life. So in reality, it's a good thing. That we have jobs that we have a place to go to Dr feta Birnbaum. She's whether she is a psychologist. She's been doing this for over thirty years back. No, no, no. You're gonna founder of the saddle river center for psychotherapy. I love saddle river, New Jersey. Oh, it's gorgeous country of their, you know, you're the, you're the rich kids. Right. So what I would do is like I grew up know, just in, like, in Newark, so we would go to saddle river, just to see what the other half. Look like up there and I love saddle river. It's, it's just a fantastic area, but I gotta ask you this. Dr a lot of people listening to this right now. Thinking just just get liquor up this weekend. I'll just start drinking alcohol and everything will be better. No forget about that. And then Monday. Oh, come and all right. Why didn't it didn't ruin my weekend? But alcohol doesn't make anything better for anybody to me. I mean if you're drinking because of something chances are it's not good. And the something needs to be addressed. Right. Alcohol is make anything better doesn't alcohol is very scary as well. Because you're not living your life. You don't know where the days went and what about the people around you g get angry? The people look into you to enjoy a social experience. You letting other people down as well not only yourself and going back to work. Not having been bef- rash. Not having that kind of downtime positive experience not only affects your work, but affects your psyche as a human being because then what else is there as you know, are you living to work? No, you work to live. That's what we really have to do. You know, today, we're working three days a week from our office at home. We're not even going into work, and taking the commute are the offices or anything that we used to so things. I really changing rapidly and we do have more playtime, we do have more downtime. You know, all these large companies Google, Amazon, whatever they're incorporating that into their daily work experiences. So if you're drinking, you're going in the other direction, completely you have no time to enjoy your life as well..

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