Baptist Schloss, Sixteen Years discussed on The Rich Roll Podcast
So I feel like it always has something to offer about human folly about the nature of the divine. Whatever it is like I love the biblical text. I'm interested in how you found your way back. But I think in order to really understand that we need to like. Stand. Go to the beginning a little bit here. So you grew up in the church of Christ. Yes. It was called. So that's from what I understand very intense. Yeah, it's like Baptist Schloss. Right. And your parents were were pretty hard core in this tradition. I mean, it was just our whole lives. You know? I went to church three times a week for sixteen years. Yeah. People cannot wars your experience as a young person going to church three times a week. That's the thing about anybody's childhood. Is you don't know? It's weird until you meet other people in hear their stories, and you're like the weird, then, you know. So I didn't know it was weird. I mean, and there was beautiful things about it. There's something to be said about being raised in a community, and we did sort of carry through difficult times and celebrate and joyful times together and. And I was just I was so used to gather like you said showing up in a location every week with the same people doing the same thing. I was so marked by that that on some level. I've tried to recreate a healthy version of it my whole life. Right. So then what leads you? I was going to use the word stray. I don't know if that's the right word. But like you start exploring drugs and alcohol at some point like what happened. Okay. So what happened is that? I was really sick as a kid. So I had autoimmune disorder and one of the one of the things that happened is it 'cause fatty tissue to build up behind the bones in my face. So my eyeballs themselves were pushed forward out of my head. So they bowled really far out of my face to where my eyelids couldn't close, and you could see a lot of white around the entire iris. So they looked like they were falling out of my is very weird looking. And so I had that I disease from ages twelve to sixteen because they couldn't do all the surgeries to correct it until the bones of my face, stop growing. So it's like the worst years. Because a lot of people when they're middle school. They think they look like an insect. I literally did. And so I think I just always thought like one of two things can happen. If you have that experience, you can either maybe become like a diminished person who tries to disappear or alternately, you can go. Yeah. Fuck you. Right. And that's what I did. So I had this anger about how treated. That I'm really grateful for because it that anger preserved something it did protect something in me that remained unharmed. But it ends up. If you mix a lot of drugs and alcohol with that. It's not the best combination. So. I started using when I was fifteen then left the church, no sixteen and. Yeah. Just ends up. Like, I had that thing where you just don't have the off switch. Was it drugs alcohol? Everybody's like choice. I did a lot of drugs to lot of coke and a bunch of other stuff. But it never never kicked my ass. The way alcohol did so for whatever reason alcohol was the thing that if I had won the switch off, and I could not I couldn't stop. So. That's the thing. That was the hardest for me. Yeah. But you've got sober so young..